More confidence in your 30's Than 20's?

[yellowstoneman2012]

Any other mature don juans feel this way? In my twenties I wasnt established in my career and wasnt really making a decent salary.

Anyone else feel more confident early, mid to late thirties,than they did years ago?

You getting more attention from the ladies?

 

[Buddha_Mind]

At age 27 I'm 10x more confident than I was...I think 10 years from now I'll be 10x more confident than I am now...it's all upwards and onwards towards something better...

I was a complete sh!t with women in the past. I've got things to work on no doubt, but I'm LEVELS above where I was even 2 years ago.

@OP -- are you in MT or WY?

 

[Desdinova]

Hell yes. In my 20s, I had moved back in with my parents, trying to pay off debt, dumped on my ass by my fiancee. Now I'm in my 30s, I own a house, have a kick ass job that pays more and gives me more 'me' time, and I'm in the best shape I've been in years.

The confidence is really showing too. Women are naturally drawn to me and clients are delighted when I show up to do work.

 

[zekko]

I think the career thing is huge, honestly. This is something I didn't really get together until my late 20s/early 30s. Before that, I was kind of floundering around. In my early 20s, it seemed to me that most people I knew made money than I did - that gave my confidence a huge hit at the time. By my early 30s, that situation had reversed.

I know this goes against all PUA teaching, but I really think that a man's confidence comes from his work - from his ability to support himself and stand on his own two feet. That's the way I was raised, anyway.

Of course, pickup gurus will tell you that if you make money, girls will view you as a beta provider type. I truly believe that is garbage they make up to peddle thier techniques to average guys.

If you are successful, girls may view you as a potential provider, but it's the PUAs who throw the "beta" part in there. Pickup gurus will lead you to believe girls only want to have sex with poor badboy types. Sorry, that doesn't make sense. I've felt enough wet panties in my life to know that isn't true.

 

[yellowstoneman2012]

Thanks guys. I live in jersey....but going to yellowstone in a few weeks

 

[samspade]

It's not an ironclad rule but experience helps give a man a more measured perspective and calmer approach. That boosts a quiet confidence that women love.

Men in their 20s can be confident of course, but it's often (not always) caffeinated or immature. Not saying it doesn't attract women - it does. It's just that women can tell when a man has experience. I would say that moreso than adding years, adding experience with different women is what gives a man that aura of self-certainty.

 

[bigneil]

As long as you stay on course in your career it keeps getting better. The older you get the more is expected of you, but if you are on par then you certainly gain.

Age 41 was my best year so far. 27 was the first great year - you hope to maintain yourself after that age.

 

[Eternal_water]

Well I hope so cos I need something to swing my way.

I'm just getting stared now hunting down a career.

 

[pdx1138]

my 30's have been WAY better than my 20's for damn sure.

 

[marmel75]

Yeah absolutely. I know I would give any girl the fvcking of her lifetime, and that few could handle me based on experience. I go out of my way to try and find these young sh!t talking chicks used to making dudes blow their loads in 5 minutes and make them beg for mercy...
As Style says to tell them if they ask how old you are,
"Young enough to do it often and old enough to do it right"

 

[Trump]

I wouldn't say more confident in the 30s, I would say caring less. In your 20s all you can think about is girls girls girls, you fight friends, you fight enemies, you miss work, you backstab, you steal, all because of wanting to get action.

In your 30s you start to mature, and you realize its about you have to offer. And most of them want a guy with money after they've had their fun with the bad boys, so you have the upper hand.

 

[bigneil]

On average they say a man is his most handsome at age 35 (or older if you still look 35 - my mom always said mid-40's was the most handsome age for a man).

But make no mistake, hitting age 36 = 18 * 2. You suddenly become their Dad.

And I just turned 42 = 21 * 2. I've been old enough to drink... long enough to drink!

 

[ilikecharlene]

I would yes.

Speaking personally, over the past 5-6 years, I've started to think "**** it, I am who I am, that's it!" and just roll with it.

 

[Zerro]

Looking back it's amazing how much my life has improved in the past year alone, a lot of things turned around for me between 29 to 30. I'm doing better now in everything than I ever did before.

Yeah absolutely. I know I would give any girl the fvcking of her lifetime, and that few could handle me based on experience. I go out of my way to try and find these young sh!t talking chicks used to making dudes blow their loads in 5 minutes and make them beg for mercy...

It's well worth it to see the shock on their faces when they realize that you've been screwing them for an hour straight. I got a girl in her mid-20's now and she's so damn pleased to finally have a man who can just keep going and going.

 

[floydb25]

I was more successful with stupid, shallow women in my mid-20s, but have a LOT more confidence overall in my early 30s. I don't base confidence or success on women or getting laid. Maybe that's the reason. Used to be obsessed with women, and felt worthless whenever I got rejected. Plus I was crazy and dysfunctional.

Nowadays, I'm pretty content. No worries. Stopped caring about a lot of **** that doesn't matter. Society is definitely not what you should base your life on. Too much disappointment, and way too many stupid people out there. I have no interest in status, being cool, getting laid, having hot chicks, etc. Doesn't matter to me. Never really did. Just went with the crowd, and what society deemed as "successful". Ha. **** society. :nono:

The biggest change is not doing things to appease or be accepted by other people. I no longer care about what they think, and avoid the status crowd completely.

I still get attention from women, but actually have standards, and no longer associate with losers. They can **** right off. I try not to be as loud or out there as I used to be, either. Trying to attract decent people, and working on being the same way myself. It's a lot different when you're not a douche bag *******, or chase the equivalent / avoid them like the plague they are. The quality improves, but definitely not the quantity. Unfortunately, that just means there's a lot of losers out there. :trouble: Plus moving to a new state and blah blah.

Really, just no time for that **** anymore. I'm old and lazy. :rockon:

 

[Rubirosa]

upwards and onwards towards something better you say, well I think that's true to an extent, like, your confidence gets better, but girls don't wanna bang 40 year olds. a lot of dumbasses on this forum think age isn't a turn off to women no matter what.

yea, your confidence gets better as you get older, but there's still the aging effects of getting older, and the two are battling against eachother, girls don't like the wrinkles

Because of my age, me simply responding to your post makes me look like on I'm on the defensive, but I'm not.....I simply want to enlighten.....

Let's get one thing out of the way first....
Unless a tragedy or terrible disease gets you early, you too will be my age someday, or even older, so don't have such a negative view of age, because it's your future as well. However, when I was 23, I had the exact same attitude as you.

Notice I said "age" and not "aging". There's a big difference. There's guys in their 20's who are fat, out of shape, and an overall physical mess, and there are guys that are in their 50's, who, despite some wrinkling in the forehead and crows feet around the eyes, rock six pack stomachs and big guns. Would you want to bang a 25 year old fatty, or a 40 year old cougar that has implants and lives at her zumba class ? I don't think a few wrinkles figure that much into the equation here as much as body shape. I think that chicks judge an older guy on where he is in life. They will like his experience and wallet, but will not be thinking long term if they themselves want to get married and have kids someday. Yet an older guy at a young nightclub will always look out of place, unless of course the chicks saw him roll up earlier in his Gallardo.

This thread is about confidence, and everyone is different. Hopefully as you get older, you will gain valuable life experience, and this experience MAY translate into confidence. Again, everyone is different and has a different life, so confidence arrives in different packages.
I guess I just want to say that there are variables to every situation, so don't be so quick to judge....

 

[Silvertip]

This is just my experience, but here goes:

In my early 20's, it was mostly false confidence and the fact that a 20-24 year old male can act like an idiot and it's winked at. I may have been brash and bold, but had nothing to back it up.

In my late 20's my confidence dipped, or I was just more in tune with reality. Most younger people have the expectation of having things handed to them, and if you have that mindset, things will come crashing down very quickly.

I'm currently in my early 30's. I've righted the ship and I have taken responsibility for my actions. I have enjoyed a lot of success, but this was a result of having worked my a$$ off for it. That is what gives me confidence. It may not be to the same level as it was 10 years ago, but the little things don't affect me as much and I have my past and present successes to pick me up.