Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Message to all smaller dudes or minority dudes out there gaming women

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,079
Reaction score
3,460
In the United States, almost none until you are a mid-40s guy only looking to date women close to your own age. Dating women close to your own age when you are 35+ is not ideal.
I'm in my mid-forties.
 

Paper Crane

Banned
Joined
Mar 6, 2021
Messages
269
Reaction score
258
Age
28
Nearly every time I see the significant other (monogamous) of some really hot girl...

He looks nothing like the stereotypical "alpha" guy that's portrayed on this site.
One of the hottest girls I've ever knew dated this short dude who looked like the epitome of drunk mexican uncle.. In fact, I knew the guy way before I met his chick. I think the reason she liked him a lot was because he was always in a good mood and funny as sh.t. he reminds me a lot of this one comedian I forgot the name of.. some stoner guy who looks like he eats pizza nd plays video games all the time. anyways, yeah different girls value different things. not all women are superficial.

9/10 times women give more attention to the guy who is havign a blast at a party, than any hot chads. the chads become an after thought or a fantasy when the girl wants to get laid.. but when she thinks about the guy she would love to know and be close with, its usually that dude who compensates for being average as sh.t or below average by having a blast anywhere anytime

people who are superficial usually have egos, and people with egos usually are insecure about a lot of stupid sh.it and often emotionally unstable.

But yeah man, I want to start doing zoom calls or something to help others out and also learn some stuff myself. I realized whenever I get too involved with talking about my own life, things end up kind topsy turvy like a bad jenga move. I rather put my energies toward helping others. Plus people have always told me I give good advice lol
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,495
Reaction score
2,772
Age
28
A lot of anecdotal stories being thrown out. I know plenty of guys that were able to get girls above their league, buttttt there was always a catch/back story and I would never want to be one of these guys. You can go out and public and see an ugly guy with a hot girl, but not know what’s truly going on in the background. Bottom line, don’t worry about what some other dude has.
 

Guy69JackBlue

Banned
Joined
Apr 5, 2021
Messages
1,213
Reaction score
587
Age
43
A lot of anecdotal stories being thrown out. I know plenty of guys that were able to get girls above their league, buttttt there was always a catch/back story and I would never want to be one of these guys. You can go out and public and see an ugly guy with a hot girl, but not know what’s truly going on in the background. Bottom line, don’t worry about what some other dude has.
Give an example of a backstory.

You mean like he's paying most of her bills in the relationship?
 

Guy69JackBlue

Banned
Joined
Apr 5, 2021
Messages
1,213
Reaction score
587
Age
43
true; agree that hot girls are not often married/ltr with alphas. one reason is that there are many more hot girls than alpha men.

What do you see, how do the guys usually look? what are the common attributes if any?
Common attributes = wimpy looking liberal guys that look like they don't mind taking a subordinate position to the woman.

Now I know the reflex response of this forum will be "she secretly hates him, she's cheating on him with Chad/Tyrone, she's just waiting for a real man to come along".... But let's not lose site of the fact that these couples are married with kids and these girls have sex with this guy only.

They might also make a lot of money. I don't really know. I can't tell that from the surface.
 
Last edited:

Guy69JackBlue

Banned
Joined
Apr 5, 2021
Messages
1,213
Reaction score
587
Age
43
Common attributes = wimpy looking liberal guys that look like they don't mind taking a subordinate position to the woman.

Now I know the reflex response of this forum will be "she secretly hates him, she's cheating on him with Chad/Tyrone, she's just waiting for a real man to come along".... But let's not lose site of the fact that these couples are married with kids and these girls have sex with this guy only.

They might also make a lot of money. I don't really know. I can't tell that from the surface.
When I added the last paragraph ("They might also make a lot..."), I initially meant it like I might be underestimating them by first appearance. But now I see that as even more beta.

Don't get me wrong... Making a lot of money is very alpha, but giving large portions to one female is pretty beta. Unless you want to have kids, I guess. But I don't have an answer for that one.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,241
Reaction score
10,502
In the United States, almost none until you are a mid-40s guy only looking to date women close to your own age. Dating women close to your own age when you are 35+ is not ideal.
I'm in my mid-forties.
Most single men in their 30s and 40s are dating women close to their own ages.

Really? How many cashiers have you picked up from the store? I mean if its as easy as you are saying, you should get a cashier to put her phone number on the receipt when you are leaving the store if she's hot right?
I've never seen a cashier, waitress, or female bartender do this.

Now I know the reflex response of this forum will be "she secretly hates him, she's cheating on him with Chad/Tyrone, she's just waiting for a real man to come along".... But let's not lose site of the fact that these couples are married with kids and these girls have sex with this guy only.

I can't tell that from the surface.
It's difficult to tell what goes on with established couples. Couples are good at making things good look great to the outside world. Anonymous surveys and other forms of research are the best information that we have about what occurs in relationships that are not our own.
 

Guy69JackBlue

Banned
Joined
Apr 5, 2021
Messages
1,213
Reaction score
587
Age
43
It's difficult to tell what goes on with established couples. Couples are good at making things good look great to the outside world. Anonymous surveys and other forms of research are the best information that we have about what occurs in relationships that are not our own.
True. I think many of them met initially when both putting on their best faces. Then there's a honeymoon phase, then maybe a bunch of boredom after you've seen everything the other person does.

They may just stay in the relationship because it's easier than trying to find something new.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,241
Reaction score
10,502
They may just stay in the relationship because it's easier than trying to find something new.
Plenty of people do that. I have a male friend who has been with the same girlfriend for 7+ years. Around the 5.5 year mark (before the pandemic hit), he told me that the relationship had peaked 2-3 years earlier. Why stick around a meandering and mediocre relationship now for 4+ years and counting.

A lot of relationships survive on inertia for many years. It is a royal pain to try to establish a new relationship. Lots of bad first dates, lots of ghosting, lots of swiping/texting, lots of late nights in the bars, lots of meaningless social events such as singles mixers, etc. These are all things that happen to people when they try and find a relationship.
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,495
Reaction score
2,772
Age
28
Plenty of people do that. I have a male friend who has been with the same girlfriend for 7+ years. Around the 5.5 year mark (before the pandemic hit), he told me that the relationship had peaked 2-3 years earlier. Why stick around a meandering and mediocre relationship now for 4+ years and counting.

A lot of relationships survive on inertia for many years. It is a royal pain to try to establish a new relationship. Lots of bad first dates, lots of ghosting, lots of swiping/texting, lots of late nights in the bars, lots of meaningless social events such as singles mixers, etc. These are all things that happen to people when they try and find a relationship.
It’s similar to accepting dead end job you hate. At the end of the day, most people are lazy and will settle for the path of least resistance.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,241
Reaction score
10,502
It’s similar to accepting dead end job you hate. At the end of the day, most people are lazy and will settle for the path of least resistance.
Despite the feminist mantra of "Never Settle!", a lot of women end up settling in mediocre relationships, though more women are choosing the carousel over mediocre to subpar LTRs.

Most men are beta too and pick a mediocre to subpar LTR over swiping, visiting the bars, etc.
 

Guy69JackBlue

Banned
Joined
Apr 5, 2021
Messages
1,213
Reaction score
587
Age
43
It’s similar to accepting dead end job you hate. At the end of the day, most people are lazy and will settle for the path of least resistance.
I don't see it as being the same as that. Because if you're in a dead end job, then if you get motivated, you can find a better job as the reward.

In a bad/stale relationship, there's no guarantee that a better relationship is out there. And I think many people get tired of relationships in general as they grow older/more experienced. To them, maybe being single/independent/divorced is the reward.
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,495
Reaction score
2,772
Age
28
I don't see it as being the same as that. Because if you're in a dead end job, then if you get motivated, you can find a better job as the reward.

In a bad/stale relationship, there's no guarantee that a better relationship is out there. And I think many people get tired of relationships in general as they grow older/more experienced. To them, maybe being single/independent/divorced is the reward.
well if you’ve been in a job for more than 5 years with built up vacation days, salary increases, and just being comfortable and you’re only option is to spend your free time looking for another job that will risk at a temporary pay cut(potentially) or go back to school(you better have savings and be single), most are going to stay at the job lol. And save the damn story about your friend that was able to quit his job and get a pay increase. You’re friend was extremely lucky good for him. That **** might work when you are already being underpaid in the first place, but when a company is overpaying you and giving you benefits, that’s what im talking about.
 
Last edited:

Guy69JackBlue

Banned
Joined
Apr 5, 2021
Messages
1,213
Reaction score
587
Age
43
well if you’ve been in a job for more than 5 years with built up vacation days, salary increases, and just being comfortable and you’re only option is to spend your free time looking for another job that will risk at a temporary pay cut(potentially) or go back to school(you better have savings and be single), most are going to stay at the job lol. And save the damn story about your friend that was able to quit his job and get a pay increase. You’re friend was extremely lucky good for him. That **** might work when you are already being underpaid in the first place, but when a company is overpaying you and giving you benefits, that’s what im talking about.
True. There must be something good about the relationship or they never would have got into it in the first place.
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,495
Reaction score
2,772
Age
28
True. There must be something good about the relationship or they never would have got into it in the first place.
I just had to overcome a stalling relationship and job situation to what I just described. Trust me dude, it wasn’t easy and I understand why people choose mediocrity over a part of resistance because it takes fighting energy
 

Paper Crane

Banned
Joined
Mar 6, 2021
Messages
269
Reaction score
258
Age
28
Honestly this has turned into something I did not expect: a lot of assumption based stuff about relationships and monogamy.

The point of this thread was simply to let dudes who are smaller in size/frame and stature as well as ethnic minority dudes who may be struggling know that you can do great with women.. It can become super easy to fall into the ideas that "its hard" for certain types of dudes.. but thats just a scarcity/victim mindset that the men that have little to no game have been pushing to validate their lack of success as well as other men who want to make themselves feel more like Chad's by convincing themselves dudes have disadvantages to them based on certain traits.
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,495
Reaction score
2,772
Age
28
Honestly this has turned into something I did not expect: a lot of assumption based stuff about relationships and monogamy.

The point of this thread was simply to let dudes who are smaller in size/frame and stature as well as ethnic minority dudes who may be struggling know that you can do great with women.. It can become super easy to fall into the ideas that "its hard" for certain types of dudes.. but thats just a scarcity/victim mindset that the men that have little to no game have been pushing to validate their lack of success as well as other men who want to make themselves feel more like Chad's by convincing themselves dudes have disadvantages to them based on certain traits.
I'm over hearing about how great Chad is lol. He has his problems too and he if he doesn't get his **** together he will end up in divorce court, fat, and sterilized like the rest of men. Yall need to realize that every dude simps for the girl they actually want.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,936
Reaction score
12,147
Location
DFW, TX
One of the hottest girls I've ever knew dated this short dude who looked like the epitome of drunk mexican uncle.. In fact, I knew the guy way before I met his chick. I think the reason she liked him a lot was because he was always in a good mood and funny as sh.t. he reminds me a lot of this one comedian I forgot the name of.. some stoner guy who looks like he eats pizza nd plays video games all the time. anyways, yeah different girls value different things. not all women are superficial.

9/10 times women give more attention to the guy who is havign a blast at a party, than any hot chads. the chads become an after thought or a fantasy when the girl wants to get laid.. but when she thinks about the guy she would love to know and be close with, its usually that dude who compensates for being average as sh.t or below average by having a blast anywhere anytime
Whomever it is might not be "compensating", they might be really enjoying themself and not overly focused on females.

people who are superficial usually have egos, and people with egos usually are insecure about a lot of stupid sh.it and often emotionally unstable.
That's alot of folk.

But yeah man, I want to start doing zoom calls or something to help others out and also learn some stuff myself. I realized whenever I get too involved with talking about my own life, things end up kind topsy turvy like a bad jenga move. I rather put my energies toward helping others. Plus people have always told me I give good advice lol
Helping others can help yourself.
 

Paper Crane

Banned
Joined
Mar 6, 2021
Messages
269
Reaction score
258
Age
28
I'm over hearing about how great Chad is lol. He has his problems too and he if he doesn't get his **** together he will end up in divorce court, fat, and sterilized like the rest of men. Yall need to realize that every dude simps for the girl they actually want.
No disrespect but when you argue about "Chads" it only makes you a fool, in the sense that Chad never exists. It's an internet stereotype/character. Any logical person knows that just because a dude is tall, handsome, has a lot of money --it doesn't buy him the key to every girls ***** or heart or mean that he has it made in the shade and that life is perfect for them. To find a tall handsome dude that's completely well rounded is rare. Ask any sociable extroverted person who's met and spoke to thousands of people in their life. Everyone has their flaws man. Its just a part of life.

Does it help to be tall and handsome in the dating scene? Of course it does man! That's what most girls want.. It's just like a lot of dudes want that beautiful 10/10 with big natural breasts, a slim waist, and a bubble butt. Does that mean that's all we want or would settle for? Nah not at all. Even if you have those things as a man, it doesn't buy you perfection. It doesn't help you overcome your flaws or any other issues you might have.
 
Top