Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

Men Paying for Dates Pros and Cons (Please Watch)

Sega Genesis

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2024
Messages
1,075
Reaction score
831
Guys please watch below video not just respond to thread title :D, it's only 7.5 minutes. It discusses men paying/not paying for dates, including first dates, and pros and cons of each.

On the pro side of men paying, it advocates men being strong Leaders; as such demonstrateling to the women he is or will be a good provider for the family. Which is masculine, strong, demonstrates Leadership and an immensely attractive quality to most women.

Pros also discuss weeding out women who are ungrateful and unthankful who don't thank you for paying and feminist boss babes who want to he treated as an "equal" versus submissive and feminine that you guys apparently want.

The guy on the pro side also asserts that masculine men should Lead and should actually be turned off if a woman offers to pay he thinks to himself "oh your one of those feminist types who wants to be treated like a man, a boss babe who prefers to NOT be Lead but instead will attempt to lead herself and take charge."

He states men need to be better than this and not tolerate that nonsense. It's why relationships have gone to shyt and no one knows what to do anymore.

The cons are it saves money for the man and demonstrates kindness and thoughtfulness on her part and lack of possible entitlement thinking.

Thoughts?

 
Last edited:

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

BaronOfHair

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 14, 2024
Messages
5,653
Reaction score
3,104
Age
37
@Sega Genesis "On the pro side of men paying, it advocates men being strong Leaders; as such demonstrateling to the women he is or will be a good provider for the family. Which is masculine, strong, demonstrates Leadership and an immensely attractive quality to most women"

At this point, paying for the 1st "date" is a custom less susceptible to eradication than is gang r-pe in prison showers. Shelling out a few bucks on coffee, in and of itself, doesn't demonstrate much
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
3,912
Reaction score
2,591
@Sega Genesis "On the pro side of men paying, it advocates men being strong Leaders; as such demonstrateling to the women he is or will be a good provider for the family. Which is masculine, strong, demonstrates Leadership and an immensely attractive quality to most women"

At this point, paying for the 1st "date" is a custom less susceptible to eradication than is gang r-pe in prison showers. Shelling out a few bucks on coffee, in and of itself, doesn't demonstrate much
I dropped $300 on our fist date years ago to take her bowling and have a good time. Best $300 I've ever spent.
 

Sega Genesis

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2024
Messages
1,075
Reaction score
831
Shelling out a few bucks on coffee, in and of itself, doesn't demonstrate much.
You might be surprised how important that one small gesture is to a woman though.

As the leader of the discussion states (the late Charlie Kirk), many men don't consider how the woman might feel and view the gesture. They are only viewing from their own male lens/ perspective.

As one man even admitted "it's not a big deal."

CK responded "try putting yourself in her shoes, it's a massive big deal."
 

BadBoy89

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
2,430
Reaction score
2,723
The guy on the pro side also asserts that masculine men should Lead and should actually be turned off if a woman offers to pay he thinks to himself "oh your one of those feminist types who wants to be treated like a man, a boss babe who prefers to NOT be Lead but instead will attempt to lead herself and take charge."
Or he thinks to himself "oh you are one of those feminist types who wants to be treated as an independent woman, a boss babe who will tie me up during love making and give me the night of my life"

He states men need to be better than this and not tolerate that nonsense. It's why relationships have gone to shyt and no one knows what to do anymore.
And whose fault is that?

Women told men "We don't want it to be the 1950s. We want to be independent, we want education, we want freedom, and above all: we want to be equal." OK, fair. Men gave them all that.

But when it comes to spending money, women told men "We want it be the 1950s"

The issue isn't men paying for the dates. The issue is woman want it both ways.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Sega Genesis

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2024
Messages
1,075
Reaction score
831
@BadBoy89 did you watch the short 7 minute video? What you just posted IS a valid argument but CK explained why unfortunately it's become this way in the video.

Agree it's a big problem as well.
 

BadBoy89

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
2,430
Reaction score
2,723
@BadBoy89 did you watch the short 7 minute video? What you just posted IS a valid argument but CK explained why unfortunately it's become this way in the video.

Agree it's a big problem as well.
Yes I did.

He is confusing a woman's natural desire with the laws. Men actaully prefer paying for everything everything, as long as the woman takes care of the home, raises the kids, and has no economic, legal, financial, or social power.

When a woman has that power, men don't want to pay.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
17,037
Reaction score
19,407
It also depends WHERE you are in the world. If you do this in Scandanavia, it is seen as insulting and as if you are saying the woman is beneath you.
 

Sega Genesis

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2024
Messages
1,075
Reaction score
831
It also depends WHERE you are in the world. If you do this in Scandanavia, it is seen as insulting and as if you are saying the woman is beneath you.
Many women in the US feel this^^ way also. Some women feel insulted when a man holds the door for her! And other such gestures.

The argument is if you encounter a woman like this, expect her to be a boss bytch type in your relationship/marriage too.

OTOH if you only see her as a casual plate, then obviously that's different.
 

Sega Genesis

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2024
Messages
1,075
Reaction score
831
i think that in general how someone responds to kind gestures tells a lot about themselves
Agree with this^^. Which was precisely my point.

How she responds gives you a lot of information about her IF you're paying attention and give a f*** other than simply banging her.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Prepostereax

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2025
Messages
241
Reaction score
298
I'm in the camp of "the dude should lead, and be prepared to pay"
The first time at least

But first dates don't have to be, shouldn't be, expensive to be enjoyable

I get that some guys have high volume and even small expenses add up
I suspect the lotharios I know irl don't really do "dates"

One oft-repeated complaint I overhear from the OLD carousel fillies at work:
"Guys don't date anymore"
I assume they are just smashing after drinks or coffee, and the girl doesn't classify that as a date
 

Sega Genesis

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2024
Messages
1,075
Reaction score
831
One oft-repeated complaint I overhear from the OLD carousel fillies at work:
"Guys don't date anymore"
I assume they are just smashing after drinks or coffee, and the girl doesn't classify that as a date
^^If that keeps happening then she needs to take responsibility as well, for agreeing to it.

Imo she can't agree to keep smashing after drinks or coffee but then turn around and complain "guys don't date anymore."

Yes they absolutely DO date. I met my bf at a party, met for coffee two days later and he took me to see Phantom of the Opera and dinner the following Friday and we are still dating.

We teach people how to treat us.
 

BaronOfHair

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 14, 2024
Messages
5,653
Reaction score
3,104
Age
37
@Sega Genesis "As the leader of the discussion states (the late Charlie Kirk), many men don't consider how the woman might feel and view the gesture"

CK-if memory serves correctly-married and started fathering kids while still in his 20s, and claimed to have not dated much prior, on account of his religious beliefs. Had he done so, he might've recognized:

Attractive young women are surrounded by men who aren't hesitant to splurge on them. Such an act therefore is nothing she isn't already accustomed to, and thus any sap who does so isn't demonstrating value, leadership, etc etc

Hate to speak ill of the dead, nonetheless Ol'Chuckie, in this instance anyway, was the equivalent of someone who'd engaged in one scuffle back in junior high "teaching" self-defense to folks in the slums of Chicago
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
17,037
Reaction score
19,407
lived in Stockholm for like 1 year, even there girls will appreciate you paying for drinks, at least for the first time if they like you

They just do not like if it comes with expectations or if you do it all the time
Gamla Stan was so freaking cool...also I could not believe how many hot women were there...the ratio of hot women is extremely high.

It was kind of funny tho, I was getting looked at like a freak because of my muscularity and build and I actually had a woman come up and grab my arm and tell me I looked strong like a Viking in front of her, I assume boyfriend, who didn't look too pleased. :lol:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

plumber

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
1,033
Reaction score
885
i have had some women that really want to pay; as a gesture of high interest... and they always followed that up with same day romance. they knew i could pay... but wanted to be seen as different. ultimately for me the pay or not pay was not really in my calculation and i did not really appreciate the gesture as much. i learned later that in come cases it was really expensive for them...

money is part of smv. if she clearly has more than me its a negative. in most circles the men have more than the women, so it means i will have competitors that likely are difficult for me to compete with. its not a death sentence but its something to note.

my preference. i pay, it is assumed, she is happy to be with someone that takes care of her. if she wants to take charge then its not a good fit for me and i can wish her good luck. i have to compete with men, i don't want a mate that i have to compete with.
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
6,578
Reaction score
11,626
If I am asking a girl out then I am paying. Its really not a big deal. If you can't afford to date then you should probably spend your time working so you have more money, not playing. He who has the gold wins anyways.

Screen good enough ahead of time and you won't waste your money on some wh0re looking for free drinks/food. A chic trying to dictate or change the location of the date is always a sign. Simply find someone else to take out if that occurs.

It was rare that I asked a chic to dinner. Dinner leads to full stomachs, less-friendly breath, and smelling like a restaurant. This is not conducive to seduction.
 

Mertz09

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2024
Messages
299
Reaction score
167
Location
Houston Tx.
I agree with Charlie Kirk. 100 %. As he says, the man should lead in the relationship.
 
Top