"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Married With Question

DaedalusXXX

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Moralist need not answer. I seek solutions, not criticisms.

I am married, have been for a while, and I value the relationship and the stability that it brings on one level, and on another level I have a desire like any man to express himself sexually with other attractive women.

Now, I have noticed that as I get out into the "dating" well, sneaky dating scene, that I have become hesistant in my game. For example, I have two hot girls now that I met, they became interested, they called, we went out, then I stalled. One of them lost interest, the other is still hanging on while I am still stalling. There are two others who dig me, but I haven't really laid the true ground work "express myself sexually".

The thing is, I KNOW, that all three of these women I could have sex with, but I am have been really hesistant to push those buttons and assert myself that way.

Here are my questions:

1. Now that I have stalled so long that some have backed off, (probably because they thought it was a lack of interest) should I just cut them off completely, or should I see if I can restroke the fire.

2. If you think I should restroke the fire, how do I do that.

3. Do you think I am just in a slump, because this has never happened to me before.

Before you answer, to provide you with a little more background, I have recently taken over a company and have a relatively high profile job. I also am going to start a weekly television show soon based upon my job. Do you think I am simply fearful of exposure?


Thanks for the response.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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MackJr

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Without getting too deep into morals, you may be relcutant to deal with the consequences an affair would entail. I'm not condemning you, just saying that we tend to have natural inhibitions regarding things that could cause us trouble.
 

Reflex

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Originally posted by DaedalusXXX

Here are my questions:

1. Now that I have stalled so long that some have backed off, (probably because they thought it was a lack of interest) should I just cut them off completely, or should I see if I can restroke the fire.

2. If you think I should restroke the fire, how do I do that.

3. Do you think I am just in a slump, because this has never happened to me before.

Before you answer, to provide you with a little more background, I have recently taken over a company and have a relatively high profile job. I also am going to start a weekly television show soon based upon my job. Do you think I am simply fearful of exposure?


Thanks for the response.

Awesome news about the TV show. Wonder what it'll be. Anyway, there is a good quote that you should abide by. "Strike while the iron is hot." Is this a matter of you afraid to escalate to the next level or are you just afraid for the fear of rejection. A good way to "rekindle" the fire is to set up a meet with the girls one by one and just hang out with them for couple hours. Get them comfortable with you, just talking, and escalate so you're both comfortable touching each other. Then you can go from there.
 

DaedalusXXX

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---

I don't know man-

What I do know is I AM NOT AFRAID OF REJECTION

Maybe it is a fear of being caught and the potential repercussions of that.

Iono, it is kind of odd because I set up all the circumstances for steamy hot sex with sexy women, and then I let it hang there.



Kind like a premature ejaculation.

:(

I really want to bring these fires back up, but my time is limited, Any suggestions on doing it quickly?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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WaterTiger

Master Don Juan
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So we won't look at it as a moral thing. We'll look at it strictly business.

You entered a contract with all your family & friends as witnesses, that you would only "do business' with one company. Now you feel that you are not getting the service you deserve and want to "do business" with other companies. If you're caught "doing business" with other companies, the original company will sue you. You should get a lawyer and negotiate OUT of the priginal contract.

Then you will be free to "do business" with other companies as you feel the need. This also frees your original company to go find a new supplier that can better meet her needs.

On the bright side....if they are making a TV show about your job, then a messy divorce will really drive up the ratings!
 

SDBmania

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Hehe, nicely put WaterTiger.

It's like a contract. Although, usually contracts have to run out and then you don't have to renew it. So actually, I guess it's not really like a contract. Umm, wait, never mind. I've got myself confused now!
 

MackJr

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I'll say one more thing. Your judgment is what has allowed you to get the fancy career, tv show, and even made you attractive to hot babes. If it's telling you to hold back, I'd listen to it and find another outlet for your desires so that you can keep the other things you earned. You'll still be a whole man even if you don't have Ivana Trump hanging off your arm.
 

DaedalusXXX

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Thank You Mack Jr.

You have a relevent answer...

The moral platitudes of some individuals always amuse me...

Potential it becomes a matter of perspective...

Hell I will write a post on it...
 
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