Bullbearpig
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2018
- Messages
- 111
- Reaction score
- 59
- Age
- 50
Hey guys, Im new here, I came across this site from reading The Rational Man. Heres my deal...First off let me say Im 43, I honestly dont have much experience with women, Ive only been in 2 real relationships my whole life. One was for a few months and the other for about a year. Im actually a very good looking guy, I get checked out by women everywhere I go, and Ive had some damn hot ass women throw themselves at me more than once. But I blow it in short order. Ive had many "situationships" That I wasnt into because I didnt feel attraction, and Ive got a few girls now that really want a LTR from me, but Im not physically attracted to them so its a no go. Any way, I had a recent experience that really makes me ask myself whats wrong with me. Ive been at my job for about 8 months now. There is a woman who works there that I thought was pretty hot, but shes married so I never tried to pursue anything. Ill call her Lisa. Well one night my coworkers and I were out at a bar after work. Up to this point I hadnt gotten to know anyone really well and one of my coworkers asked me If I was married and I told her I was single. She said she couldnt believe I was single because of how handsome I was. As soon as Lisa heard I was single she Was litterally all over me...rubbing my chest and shoulders, she told the other girl that we were gonna make out and asked me if I wanted to feel how nice her nipples were, so I put my hand down her shirt in front of all our other coworkers. I was a little shocked at how strong she was coming on, but I played it cool and just remembered she was drunk. Well a few weeks later we were out at another bar after work and Lisa told me in her car that she wanted to "jump my bones". I put my hand behind her neck and pulled her in and kissed her. We drank and flirted and just had a good time. After the bar closed she was giving me a ride to where I left my work van, and after we got there, we made out like mad and I fingered her in her car. That was it, I went home and jerked off.
So heres my issue...I didnt have any other women in my life and I was getting pretty lonely and frustrated about that. On one hand I wanted to bang the **** out of her, But on the other hand I knew it could bring about regret and future consequences for ****ing a married coworker whom I didnt even know at all. Add to this that I thought it was really reckless of her to come on so strong, she didnt even know me and she did it in plain view of our other coworkers. That made me question what kind of woman she was and If I really wanted to get involved with her. I was having an inner struggle. I was unsure about the whole situation and myself. I should have just manned up and did what I knew in my heart was the right thing to do... told her no and left it right there. That would have kept our work situation uncomplicated and her attraction would have grown for me. I should have treated her like a spinning plate. But instead I did the most beta thing I could have done...Told her I wanted to be friends first and see if it could develop. We would hang out and make out, but that was it she wouldnt let me go any further. Long story short, I demonstrated lots of scarcity mindset without even realizing it. I thought I was building attraction but she lost all sexual attraction for me in short order, while mine for her became greater. She played me like a fiddle and I let her.
After a couple months I finally stopped being her "friend" and now we just dont talk, and I never ****ed her. After reading The Rational Man, I see all the mistakes I made in our short situationship. All the things that I was doing that I thought were "alpha" were actually beta as **** and I feel like a complete idiot. Im 43, I should be wiser than this. I know the key is an abundance mindset, and Im working hard to try to get an abundance in my life, Im gaining the courage to cold approach women in grocery stores, and places like that and Ive gotten some good responses because of my looks, but at my age my choices are alot narrower that they used to be. Women in my age range are usually married. I got the number of a pretty hot 29yo nurse the other day, but its too much of an age difference. Im not gonna lie about my age either, Im done with that kind of stupid ****. Im taking a good hard look at myself and Im seeing patterns of mistakes and I could really use some advice.
'
So heres my issue...I didnt have any other women in my life and I was getting pretty lonely and frustrated about that. On one hand I wanted to bang the **** out of her, But on the other hand I knew it could bring about regret and future consequences for ****ing a married coworker whom I didnt even know at all. Add to this that I thought it was really reckless of her to come on so strong, she didnt even know me and she did it in plain view of our other coworkers. That made me question what kind of woman she was and If I really wanted to get involved with her. I was having an inner struggle. I was unsure about the whole situation and myself. I should have just manned up and did what I knew in my heart was the right thing to do... told her no and left it right there. That would have kept our work situation uncomplicated and her attraction would have grown for me. I should have treated her like a spinning plate. But instead I did the most beta thing I could have done...Told her I wanted to be friends first and see if it could develop. We would hang out and make out, but that was it she wouldnt let me go any further. Long story short, I demonstrated lots of scarcity mindset without even realizing it. I thought I was building attraction but she lost all sexual attraction for me in short order, while mine for her became greater. She played me like a fiddle and I let her.
After a couple months I finally stopped being her "friend" and now we just dont talk, and I never ****ed her. After reading The Rational Man, I see all the mistakes I made in our short situationship. All the things that I was doing that I thought were "alpha" were actually beta as **** and I feel like a complete idiot. Im 43, I should be wiser than this. I know the key is an abundance mindset, and Im working hard to try to get an abundance in my life, Im gaining the courage to cold approach women in grocery stores, and places like that and Ive gotten some good responses because of my looks, but at my age my choices are alot narrower that they used to be. Women in my age range are usually married. I got the number of a pretty hot 29yo nurse the other day, but its too much of an age difference. Im not gonna lie about my age either, Im done with that kind of stupid ****. Im taking a good hard look at myself and Im seeing patterns of mistakes and I could really use some advice.
'
