"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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making the first move

JoeBlack

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I got a feeling that I already know the answer to this one, but hey I am going to be a chump and ask it anyway ;)

There’s this girl I kind of like. I'm not all going to get one-itis, don't worry it’s not like I really, really like her. Put it this way, I'd like to get laid and have some fun with her.

We talk when we see each other a fair bit, some joking banter, and we know each other through friends. She is kind of flirty with me; though I got a feeling she is a bit naughty anyway ;)

I am stupid, because I should have asked for her number last night but didn't. Hey, I am a recovering AFC, so give me a break!! I WILL get better at this.

Anyway....

So I now have 2 options.

1. Wait till we bump into each other again and be more confident and ask her out.

2. Get her number of a friend, and make contact. Her number is easy to get through a friend and I don’t think she will think it too weird. To be honest I was going to send a text message and write something funny so she knew it was me and ask her what night she is going out with me next week? Just be super forward like I don't give a ****.

I have to get to that stage, where I am so confident I just don't give a **** what happens.

What’s the worst that could happen from me getting her number and getting in contact?

She might think it’s a touch weird I got her number and blow me off. It’s not like its going to have a negative impact on my life lol. It will just feel like awkward for about a minute the next time we speak. I’ll just shrug it off and make a joke about how she missed out on a great evening instead and I had to call my second choice up lol

Anyway… What do you think?


1 or 2?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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mad_monkey59

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Do it!!!

You might not see her again, or she might have a b/f or she might turn gay waiting for you to make a move. lol

Mate the one thing I've learnt is never to wait, just do it.
 

sapphire

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Boy is mad monkey right. You have to do it before its too late. Don't overanalyze. Just like when you know the water is cold, you jump in the water without thinking.

I say this with experience. Most recently I was flirting with my bank teller for two months and I never asked for her number even though she was giving me the signs. Just when I gathered the courage to ask her out, I find out she no longer works at the bank and I have no way of finding her.

:( :(
 

cave dweller

Master Don Juan
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do it........

Hey,

I agree, contact her.

Ask her out.

If she blows you off---It is her loss. NEXT

cave dweller
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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uniassign

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DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT go ahead with your second option. It makes you look desperate, needy and creepy. Girls hate that stuff because it shows that you do not have the guts to ask them for their number in person.
 

DeathDealer

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Originally posted by uniassign
DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT go ahead with your second option. It makes you look desperate, needy and creepy. Girls hate that stuff because it shows that you do not have the guts to ask them for their number in person.
Bzzzt wrong. Have you even tried this or are you theorizing? I've tried this recently and I've been going out with this girl for 3 months.

My story is very similar:

Hung out with this friend who also brought along other female friends. I liked this one girl but didn't get her number (DAMN!) but then next week I hung out with another group of friends who knew her coincidentally. Got her number, called her right on the spot, we hung out a week later and then we're still dating.

Desperate? What's so desperate about getting someones number from someone else, if a girl that liked me did that and I like her too but didn't ask me or I didn't ask but she got the number from my friend - I'd give her the time and day.
 
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