Kailex
Master Don Juan
That's right, you read the thread title 100% correct.
I've read the Don Juan Discussion forum for months and after seeing a few solid, golden threads from some of the senior members, it's finally dawned on me what the #1 mistake a lot of guys in here make:
- They don't want to make mistakes, in fact, they will go out of their way to avoid making mistakes.
Why?
It seems no one really wants to take the time anymore to actually experience life and what it has to offer. There used to be a time when trial-and-error meant something, but in this day and age of technological excellence, it seems that everyone wants that magic pill of the dating world. They want the answers now. I've seen a few of you post up a thread asking things like, "How do I respond to this text? When should I call? What should I do next?"... and if 15 minutes go by and no one responds to your posts, you immediately become enraged that no one would dare take the time to respond.
This is what we've come down to. We want the answers NOW, without realizing that in the past, it took EXPERIENCE, TIME... and yes, MISTAKES to learn from this dating game and become progressively better.
I know that sometimes a lot of us seem to come across as simple characters... caricatures of our real selves, but even most of the forum users from the Mature Men section can agree... we evolved through our mistakes.
I will admit that there were many times I committed a huge number of mistakes, but I've learned from them. I know that there are simple rules that are stated in the DJ Bible that are guidelines for some of us to follow, but sometimes, the best guideline is your own experience. Yes, there's a "two strike rule", but sometimes you have to strike out three times just to realize why there even is a two strike rule. And once you strike out twice, maybe you get so good at striking them out, that you'll develop your own "one strike rule".
But you can't do it without experience.
You can't do it without spending time in the field.
And you definitely can't do without making mistakes.
Stripped from the very core of game, status, and looks... we are all human beings and as someone once said: To err is human.
We WILL mistakes and anyone who says that they have never made a mistake with women... SOMEHOW... is lying. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is. We're not perfect, we WILL make mistakes, but the key is not to be afraid of making mistakes, but to embrace the idea.
I'll never know when the perfect time to call a woman back is, but I know when the perfect time is for ME. I'll never know what every woman likes in a man, but I have an idea. I'll never know whether a woman likes the same sports I like, but with time, I'll eventually find out.
And if I sit here and try to psycho-analyze every way to NOT fail, then I'll never move forward and never learn.
It HAS to happen. At some point we WILL make mistakes, and that's the beauty of it all... we get second, third, fourth chances... maybe not with the same woman, but we get a chance to learn and re-learn, evaluate and re-evaluate. So many times we get caught up on the search for the "ONE" before realizing that there is no such thing. For every woman you see that is beautiful, there is more than likely another one that is even better looking. For every woman that you think is perfect, there is probably another one out there that is even "more perfect".
I think it's time for a lot of us to stop kidding ourselves. You can't learn from a forum, 100%, and then be ready to game it up on women. It can't happen that way. Yes, you can learn C&F, but as my colleague Atom Smasher stated recently, it can be overdone. But how are you going to learn WHEN is too much unless you make the mistakes? How are you going to learn how to talk to women if you sit at a forum and try to learn from us? I think it's grand that this forum is designed to help us avoid a lot of bad decisions, but sometimes, those decisions needs to be made in order to progress.
Don't get me wrong, there are certain situations that you must certainly avoid, but to use a metaphor:
You could read up on camping, you could buy all of the camping equipment, you could look up forums to read up on tips to camp, but trust me, nothing will prepare you more for becoming a camping expert than actually putting those skills to the test. I've gone camping and the first time I went, I was clueless as to what I was doing. Now, I'm a pro, but it's because I took the time to get the experience and I made mistakes along the way.
Just like dating.
And as a disclaimer to this message, there is definitely one mistake I hope no one ever makes:
- Getting her (whoever she is) pregnant.
That's a mistake you DON'T want to make. But other than that, anything within the logical realm is fair game. Go ahead, go out there and get rejected a few times. Call a woman at an inappropriate time. Use too much C&F. Make a few mistakes, learn a little, IMPROVE. Any mistake you make is an opportunity to learn, to adapt, to evolve... so why not make a few mistakes instead of trying to learn the magic way into a woman's pants?
Why not? We get thousands of chances to literally make mistakes and learn, but more importantly to improve and become better at this. Do remember to keep a positive mindset, remember to keep it fun and remember, no mistake you can make on a simple level is a mistake that can keep you grounded as long as you don't allow it to.
Game on fellas.
I've read the Don Juan Discussion forum for months and after seeing a few solid, golden threads from some of the senior members, it's finally dawned on me what the #1 mistake a lot of guys in here make:
- They don't want to make mistakes, in fact, they will go out of their way to avoid making mistakes.
Why?
It seems no one really wants to take the time anymore to actually experience life and what it has to offer. There used to be a time when trial-and-error meant something, but in this day and age of technological excellence, it seems that everyone wants that magic pill of the dating world. They want the answers now. I've seen a few of you post up a thread asking things like, "How do I respond to this text? When should I call? What should I do next?"... and if 15 minutes go by and no one responds to your posts, you immediately become enraged that no one would dare take the time to respond.
This is what we've come down to. We want the answers NOW, without realizing that in the past, it took EXPERIENCE, TIME... and yes, MISTAKES to learn from this dating game and become progressively better.
I know that sometimes a lot of us seem to come across as simple characters... caricatures of our real selves, but even most of the forum users from the Mature Men section can agree... we evolved through our mistakes.
I will admit that there were many times I committed a huge number of mistakes, but I've learned from them. I know that there are simple rules that are stated in the DJ Bible that are guidelines for some of us to follow, but sometimes, the best guideline is your own experience. Yes, there's a "two strike rule", but sometimes you have to strike out three times just to realize why there even is a two strike rule. And once you strike out twice, maybe you get so good at striking them out, that you'll develop your own "one strike rule".
But you can't do it without experience.
You can't do it without spending time in the field.
And you definitely can't do without making mistakes.
Stripped from the very core of game, status, and looks... we are all human beings and as someone once said: To err is human.
We WILL mistakes and anyone who says that they have never made a mistake with women... SOMEHOW... is lying. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is. We're not perfect, we WILL make mistakes, but the key is not to be afraid of making mistakes, but to embrace the idea.
I'll never know when the perfect time to call a woman back is, but I know when the perfect time is for ME. I'll never know what every woman likes in a man, but I have an idea. I'll never know whether a woman likes the same sports I like, but with time, I'll eventually find out.
And if I sit here and try to psycho-analyze every way to NOT fail, then I'll never move forward and never learn.
It HAS to happen. At some point we WILL make mistakes, and that's the beauty of it all... we get second, third, fourth chances... maybe not with the same woman, but we get a chance to learn and re-learn, evaluate and re-evaluate. So many times we get caught up on the search for the "ONE" before realizing that there is no such thing. For every woman you see that is beautiful, there is more than likely another one that is even better looking. For every woman that you think is perfect, there is probably another one out there that is even "more perfect".
I think it's time for a lot of us to stop kidding ourselves. You can't learn from a forum, 100%, and then be ready to game it up on women. It can't happen that way. Yes, you can learn C&F, but as my colleague Atom Smasher stated recently, it can be overdone. But how are you going to learn WHEN is too much unless you make the mistakes? How are you going to learn how to talk to women if you sit at a forum and try to learn from us? I think it's grand that this forum is designed to help us avoid a lot of bad decisions, but sometimes, those decisions needs to be made in order to progress.
Don't get me wrong, there are certain situations that you must certainly avoid, but to use a metaphor:
You could read up on camping, you could buy all of the camping equipment, you could look up forums to read up on tips to camp, but trust me, nothing will prepare you more for becoming a camping expert than actually putting those skills to the test. I've gone camping and the first time I went, I was clueless as to what I was doing. Now, I'm a pro, but it's because I took the time to get the experience and I made mistakes along the way.
Just like dating.
And as a disclaimer to this message, there is definitely one mistake I hope no one ever makes:
- Getting her (whoever she is) pregnant.
That's a mistake you DON'T want to make. But other than that, anything within the logical realm is fair game. Go ahead, go out there and get rejected a few times. Call a woman at an inappropriate time. Use too much C&F. Make a few mistakes, learn a little, IMPROVE. Any mistake you make is an opportunity to learn, to adapt, to evolve... so why not make a few mistakes instead of trying to learn the magic way into a woman's pants?
Why not? We get thousands of chances to literally make mistakes and learn, but more importantly to improve and become better at this. Do remember to keep a positive mindset, remember to keep it fun and remember, no mistake you can make on a simple level is a mistake that can keep you grounded as long as you don't allow it to.
Game on fellas.
