"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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snoop8

Don Juan
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ok, well NOW! the new problem wit my gf, whever we talking we start all cool and stuff and like in 10 minutes we starts getting really quiet and it kinda annoys me! so i need to find a way to get her to talk more, cause ive tried the conversation starters at the bible, but they dont even work! they work for just a lil and she stops talking, all she says is ok, ok. soo yea i need some help at that, and i dont want to get another girl! i really like her, but i just need to fix this problem! thanks
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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True Wolf

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Why are you talking!? Why aren't you screwing or making out!? Just talk with her enough to set sh*t up, then have some fun. Simple, almost no talking needed.

And to get around to why she isn't talking much, this sounds like a problem on your part. From all of my experience it shows that women are hard to shut up, not to start talking.

What are you talking about!? Does she even know?

If you want help, we need details.
 

Jerky Boi

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First off, calm down man. You don't need to have a nervous breakdown just because one of you (or both) have poor social skills. I used to have this problem, especially while talking on the phone, but after a while and some good practice in real life, I began to really understand how to make your conversations better. Just picture a conversation with anyone as a big giant tree w/ hundreds of branches. Start talking and pick whatever branch you want to go off of. For example, if she starts talking about when she went on vacation to Hawaii last spring break, try something like this:

Her: Yea, my family and I went to Hawaii last summer
You: Really? I've always wanted to go there.
or
You: Where did you visit over there?
or
You: How long did you stay?
or
You: What all did you do when you got there?

The options are endless. And believe me when I say they are really endless. I almost crapped myself when I finally realized this. Makes me kinda wonder how I went all those years not knowing what to say to girls.
 

snoop8

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we talk bout random stuff! and its actually like when we talk on the phone or IM, so we cant make out like that! lol but we were talkin about her teaching me how to dance and shes like no and i just kept asking her y but she didnt told me y. i also told her to sing to be but she didnt wanted to, cuase she cant sing, and thats it
 

True Wolf

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First off, jerky boi, i if you where directing those opening comments to me, i do not appreciate it.

Second, it sounds like this goes beyond having a convo with this girl, it sounds more like you need to learn how to carry a convo period.

Third, my point in my first post was that you do not need to talk to communicate.

one last thing, do you ever hangout in person?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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snoop8

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not a lot since her parents make her go to work wit them and they still dont let her have a boyfriend, i go to her house like every one or two weeks
 

True Wolf

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Is that what you want out of the relationship? If so stay, if not move on.

Odds are that things wont change much.
 

snoop8

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yea i wanna stay wit her! and theres sometimes that we have long conversations out of nowhere! like after i posted a lil after that, we kept talking for a long time!
 
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