"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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maintaing attraction without presence (question)

governor

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attraction without presence?

Hey everyone.
I've been in a relationship with a real catch (9+, killer personality) for a couple of months. She's practically in love with me, but not in the creepy, stalker sort of way! she's off to Italy for a year, and we live in New Zealand. i'm wondering if it is at all possible to maintain attraction, without me being there physically. obviously we'll be emailing etc, but is there a way i can go about keeping her interested?
i wouldn't mind starting something up again when she comes home.
some responses would be greatly appreciated!
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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governor

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ahh...an option i had not thought of! thanks! haha.
but seriously ideas from knowledgeable djuaners?
 

Dante1a

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Well, the best thing to do is move on with your life (as I'm sure you know) and when you talk with her, be C&F and every now and then say something shockingly romantic to her.

If she meets a guy there and stops calling you for a little while..that's actually good...because you're not a friend, your a romantic interest.

Here's an example of a text I sent a girl that I'm kind of in the same situation with.

She wrote "I'm so glad monday is over!"

I wrote "Don't look now, you sound like a corperate automaton. But you are still as beautiful as a day in spring."

Guess who she called when she was drunk that night. lol..then I just laugh it off and make fun of her.
 

governor

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yeah man, sounds good.
but i (stupidly) forgot to mention that she has been a very good friend for like 3 years before we decided to go out. it wasnt a LJBF thing, we were interested in other people. then she tells me she's liked me for ages so i think 'why not give it a try?' so we did, and it's been going real good.
what i mean is, when she comes back, we are still going to be good friends, but i wouldn't mind being where we are now.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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