"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Low IL or shyness?

T

Tantric

Master Don Juan
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I'm writing this thread for a friend as he doesn't have a CPU.

basically, a girl who he met was interested in him...yet she had a BF. Nothing happened between them, and soon she introduced him to her close friend.

He ended up really liking her, but not sure how to pivot from girl #1 to her best friend.

Anyway, he asked girl#2 out for coffee and she said she would love to go...then she asked if friend #1 could come. I guess she didn't know it was a "date" type thing. He clarified, then she smiled and again said, "yeah...i'd really love to"...

They were supposed to hook up at 5 pm last night and she flaked. Then around 7 pm, friend #1 called, and invited him out with them both...okaaaaayyyy????

He shows up and they are with all of their co-workers...so it was about 6 people. The girl he likes sat next to him, but pretty much ignored him all night. She didn't talk about anything with him and pretty much acted like he didn't exist. After a while when they were out smoking, she approached him and said, "i talked it over with friend #1 and she said it was okay that you and i go out for coffee...she has a BF anyway, so i had to set her straight on that too..."

After that, again, they sat down...no communication. he treied talking to her but she seemed to be in "girl-talk/gossip mode". He stepped out a few times for a smoke, and after the last time, when he got back, they were gone...yeah they were drinking, but not enough to NOT say goodbye, or say where they were going.

I personally don't think he was dissed completely yet, but it seems her IL low...if it is, then why ask freind #1 if it was okay?

hmmmm....

thoughts?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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S

SOLDIERM16

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Bone #1... then Bone #2..... then Bone her friends.... then #1 & 2
 
B

blienk

Master Don Juan
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Not only low interest, but why does he still want this girl? They left without even telling him? That's just disrespectful.
 
S

Seraph

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He ended up really liking her, but not sure how to pivot from girl #1 to her best friend.

Anyway, he asked girl#2 out for coffee and she said she would love to go...then she asked if friend #1 could come. I guess she didn't know it was a "date" type thing. He clarified, then she smiled and again said, "yeah...i'd really love to"...

They were supposed to hook up at 5 pm last night and she flaked. Then around 7 pm, friend #1 called, and invited him out with them both...okaaaaayyyy????
---------

Boo. He would have been better off declining and saying that since #2 didn't show up at 5, he made other plans.

He shows up and they are with all of their co-workers...so it was about 6 people. The girl he likes sat next to him, but pretty much ignored him all night. She didn't talk about anything with him and pretty much acted like he didn't exist. After a while when they were out smoking, she approached him and said, "i talked it over with friend #1 and she said it was okay that you and i go out for coffee...she has a BF anyway, so i had to set her straight on that too..."
-----

Boo x2. Talking to some of the female co-workers would have been a nice try. At least try to make the best of a situation and get a number (or try to) from one of them.

After that, again, they sat down...no communication. he treied talking to her but she seemed to be in "girl-talk/gossip mode". He stepped out a few times for a smoke, and after the last time, when he got back, they were gone...yeah they were drinking, but not enough to NOT say goodbye, or say where they were going.

I personally don't think he was dissed completely yet, but it seems her IL low...if it is, then why ask freind #1 if it was okay?

hmmmm....

thoughts?
----------

Yeah, he got slammed. I don't see how this could seem like anything other than a complete lack of respect. The best thing to do would be to move on, not deal with either of them anymore and take this as a lesson learned.
 
J

JJMcLure

Master Don Juan
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1) She flaked on him to get drunk with her girlfriends.

2) If she was interested she would have wanted to talk to him right there, rather than wait for some date in the future. Instead she ignored him.

Low IL.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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