lost my girlfriend because i don't have a lot of money

[Don Israel]

she once told me if it was up to her, she'd be going out every night.

Wow, missy seems to think a real man would be able to tolerate that behavior...ha.

I just wish my love was enough for her.

Well, if you genuinely believe you gave her an honest and truefelt love and she STILL ditched you for not being up to her 'standards'...let her get a middle-aged sugar daddy. No young man should ever go for this type of female.

She makes me feel like less of a man for not being able to provide her with those things.

Remember one thing : she wanted you to feel guilty.

Who the f*** does she think she is. Not even a "sane" family member would expect you to provide more than you possibly can within your limits. Shame on her.


---------------------------------------------

 

[jophil28]

She responds with, "It's not about needing it, it's about wanting it. i want to give our kids new cars and i want to be with someone who wants the same."

i couldn't believe she said that.

But she did , and she meant it. The bell was rung at that point.

Interestingly, she then confirms her obscene materialistic aspirations here "..and I want to be with SOMEONE who wants the same."

"SOMEONE" meant you, but only if you were willing to make your life's work the satisfaction of an endless presentation of her whims, whining and childish wants.
Make no mistake, if you married her and failed to deliver a silver service life of indulgence to her approval, you would have been fired, dumped and replaced in a week by another "someone".

 

[L B]

OP made the right decision to not be with her.

One of my close friend was financially destroyed by this gold digging girl. We used to work together and become great friends. He started to date this girl that he said had a lot of game and challenged him like no other (no sh!t because she was a professional gold digger). He made good money at the time but all of a sudden started asking me for money. Then I found out that he spend all his money buying her stupid things that she didn't even need. She just wanted things to show others that she had it all.

When I tried to talk some sense into him, she banned him from seeing me. He just vanished. Won't return my phone calls. A year and a half later, I saw him at a restaurant. I thought the mofo was dead, but he was still alive. Basically during the time that he as MIA, he lost his job due to spending too much time with her. Lost his entire savings to satisfied her wants. She dumped him when he ran out of money. He was too embarrass to talk to me after that.

 

[omkara]

I was on a date on time with a girl and it later came out that the point where I lost the seduction was when I said "All I want is a 25K a year job so I can support my band to go out and play music." I actually meant that I would be happy with that for right now. I do have ambitions beyond that, but I don't see the point in broadcasting them. She told me 25K is s***. This is a girl who makes over 50K dealing cards and having old guys look at her cleavage. She told me about how she wants to travel and how she's going to Puerto Rico for her birthday! Wow! And she actually said it like it was a big deal.

Anyway yeah, basically the same thing, a total disconnect in values. It is actually a great gift to be able to appreciate the simple things in life. That way you can be satisfied with small things. Those who are so acquisitive will never be satisfied.

There are so many cute, decent girls who would be happy to go out with a guy who has a stable career at 25. If you want the 9s and 10s though, then you will probably start running into this thing again. But then maybe that is over-acquisitiveness from our side--unless you are the kind of guy who can pull those types without too much effort. Personally I would be happy with a 7, and just forget about the rest. I think beyond that point it just is more trouble than it's worth.

 

[(JJ)]

dave chappelle on the issue

start watching at 6:40

"a woman's test in life is material. a man's test is a woman...

if a man could fvck a woman in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house."

there's definitely nothing wrong with your mindset man.

 

[Jariel]

I went through the same thing last year. My business went under and I found myself having to work some manual labour job for minimum wage. My gf of 5 years b1tched and complained, blamed me and eventually left me over it.

It left me feeling like crap about my life, but time went by and I learned a really good lesson. She is a low quality, selfish piece of trash who never deserved a guy like me. My biggest fault was not losing my business, but lowering my standards and accepting someone like that in my life.

Once she was gone, I learned to accept my situation. Times are hard, people everywhere are losing their jobs, their businesses and struggling to make ends meet. Meanwhile, I'm doing what I can to get by and I've learned to enjoy my job. It's low pressure, I work with some great people in a sociable environment and it's good exercise. It's like a time out from the rat race. So what if my car is old, it works and it's good enough for me. I don't have to impress anybody else.

Meanwhile, I hit the gym 5 times per week, I spend time building my portfolio, seeking freelance jobs on the side, learning new skills and improving myself.

What's more, after experiencing rejection, after losing everything, I no longer fear either. I've emerged with more confidence than I ever have and for the first time in ages I can accept things as they are. I've been out with plenty of hot women this year and have met someone who likes me for who I am, not what I have. She's leagues above the ex that left me and I can see now that my ex did me the biggest favour I could ask for!

So if you meet a girl who b1tches about your income, get rid of her straight away. She's trash and will drag you down!

 

[Altair]

As a good friend of mine would instantly point out, there's very little value in the "Eat, Sleep, Work, Consume, Die" way of life, a lifestyle which she seemed to expect of you. You really did dodge a bullet here man.

Honestly, this sounds like a low quality girl and you can easily find a higher quality one. This wasn't a problem on your end, it was her ignorance.

 

[Kailex]

Caution to the wind:

This is why you must sh!t test your girlfriends to no end.
You NEVER know what will slip up from her mouth over the course of your relationship.

Another reason why I advocate condoms.

You imagine if the OP would have had a son/daughter by this girl and THEN found that out?


OP, beating a dead horse here, but you dodged a major bullet.
Sadly, this woman will end up in a bitter relationship or completely single and wondering what happened by the age of 40.

She does not have the makings of a quality woman.

And you just gained a mountain of experience throughout this ordeal.

 

[Bratt2230]

..

I was almost shoket from reading this..

She is not worth it! and you are definatly NOT something to be a shame of?

I am, and at your age, will be in a worse economical situation than you are. but it does not borther me, because as you say, i do not mind sitting around at home one night, just taking a break and saving some money..

For sure you are NOT the problem, she is. But i guess many women/girls in that age and until 25 is superficial wanting a guy with a lot of money - and as you said it - wanting a life just like in "Sex and the city"

 

[thegenerousjew]

I think it's highly encouraging that your question was more about what the situation says about values and the measure of success in ones life. Thats very mature thinking. Kudos!

If you're prepping to be in education its something I have something I have tons of respect for and it reflects in the charities I contribute and donate to. People like you will hopefully ensure that everyone doesn't turn out like your ex.

If she tries to get back with you, as tempting as it may be, don't.

I have my own version of this, I was with a girl for a year, [after a year of her pursuing me]. I was crazy about her and on the way to getting married [her request], things fell apart in just a couple of months when she realized that it would take a while for me to establish a financially stable career since I was switching industries. Inspite of the fact that by the age of 25 I had sold off my first venture for a $100k!

Yeah people are different. Sometimes we realize that when its too late. In your case in the long run you'll be glad you realized it before you made any bad long term life decisions.

 

[f283000]

She sounds like an average American woman.

Like I always say, don't take any woman too seriously.

 

[OldbutSTRONG]

Honestly, she just sounds like a typical young North American woman who knows she's in the prime of her life and wants it all before she shrivels up and can't find a sucker to fund all her causes.

I don't blame her for her entitlement. She's doing all she can before the wrinkles set in.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

I dated this girl a year ago, she sold me newspaper advertising. She was just a very cute, girly-voiced, flirty little thing. When I picked her up, she lived with her parents, though in a separate house on a 150 acre horse farm. Found out her dad owns a huge auto group in the area and they are loaded.

The thing is, I'm not from a poor family either, but my own ventures had yet failed to gain any steam at the time. Like many others, my lumberyard failed in 2008. It was a ****ty feeling, I got the impression I should've been further along. But not so much from her, I just thought "I'd rather have a better story to tell, running with a crowd like this."

Fvck it man, just take your licks and keep moving forward. Don't get snagged on stuff like this - "Fvck the dumb sh!t", as they say. Stay positive, keep searching for your place in the world, and learn how to invest or start a business. You don't need revenge on anyone else, and you don't need to do this for anyone else, but you must do these things for yourself.

 

[nismo-4]

Quite a long post, but it was worthy of reading.

You dodged a bullet. She ain't worth it. Your princess is in another castle.

She wanted to settle down with you provided you got the money to provide for her and her kids. She dictated her lifestyle and it goes to show you that most hot babes want a guy with money to provide for them and will have a handsome hunk f**k them. Seeing as how she only saw faults in you, I would've long got rid of her ass. But it was good that this ended. This does kind of remind me of Sex and the City and she's trying to find a successful man before her looks fade.

Just consider this a closed chapter. Imitate Toyota and keep moving forward. Sometimes God removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

That's my ruling.

Case closed.

 

[highconscienceness]

This post puts me in the mood for some too $hort. Fvck my car. :crackup:

Who the **** said teachers can't make good money? Look at Mystery, David DeAngelo, Styles. That broad would make a bad mother, I wouldn't want her to have my children.

 

[mustfirstregister]

next

 

[j0n24]

She seems like sort that will blow all the money in the savings account, max out the credit cards, and then lose the house to the bank.

She probably already has a bad line of credit as well as a few maxed credit cards. I DOUBT she even has a savings account with anymore in it someone like this doesnt think about the long run.

Personally I dont understand how she can actually think she can sustain this lifestyle when she still has to pay off her student loans.

Then again like he said she's spoiled so her parents are probably keep her afloat.. once they are gone you can probably bet it will be a huge spiral downward.

Also OP dont call her a "Good Person," She doesnt know the definition of a good person. She left you and made you feel like cra4p because you didnt make lots of money.....how selfish does someone have to be to leave someone for that?

 

[Frisky]

OK, so there's several things that come to mind for me here:

1. I'm not seeing much about mutual support from her to you. All I get is her wanting financial support from you.
2. She has aspirations to a lifestyle which clearly you are not in a position to offer right now.
3. Yes a woman DOES want a man with ambitions, a man with a purpose in life otherwise she feels she risks becoming that purpose, which is potentially threatening.
4. IMO you have a very realistic and pragmatic approach to your current cirumstances, and if I were your lady I would appreciate those qualities in you. I would know that you are financially sound and responsible.
5. One characteristic of the very wealthy is that they are FRUGAL. Spending money on new cars is wasting money...maybe it would be better to invest that money to get your kids a deposit on a house?
6. You think long-term. She thinks immediate gratification.

She may be a lovely lady in many ways, but in the long run you and she are not remotely compatible. I suspect she will end up always broke, always wanting more, and probably unhappy no matter how many material things she has.

You value the qualities in people, yourself and what you care about.

Go well and be proud of who you are and what you stand for. I wish more people had your insight and wisdom!

 

[everywomanshero]

Some people are very stupid when it comes to money. They end up in all kind of debt and then their day to day lives are even affected because they can never get to the point of even paying on the principle due to finance charges, late fees, and then any credit they get from that point on is sky high interest even on things they really need (housing, cars). Some people even get to the point that no one will rent to them without thousands of dollars in security deposits. I've known women and men like that,and they will be looking for someone to bail them out. If you end up married or sharing housing to someone like that, it won't change them, they will just ruin your credit too.

 

[Darth]

But there still is a huge disconnect between what it costs to legitimately afford a lifestyle like that, and just "pretending".

That's right. I say, don't live above your means. Your ACTUAL means. I'm really sorry about this man. The girl is clearly a jerk and has her priorities wrong. You're a very wise person to realize that buying new cars and trying to compete with everyone else in the ratrace is not what life is about.

YOU are the normal one .

EDIT:

she even insulted my chosen career path of being a teacher because they don't make a lot of money. when i told her it wasnt about the money, it was about making a difference and inspiring young people, she told me i was naive.

How stupid. You are better off without her.