"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Losing my DJism: How do I get it back?

WestCoaster

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OK, just got out of grad school a few months ago and moved to a city where I know NOBODY.

A brief summary: I was a somewhat older grad student but gained a lot of confidence there with the career change and reading this site. I was never really an AFC (well, a long time ago) but I was just kind of bland. Read the DJ site and started dating lots of nice (and much younger) undergrads and grad students. The DJ stuff worked like a charm. I was cruising.

Well, reality hit, which is called graduation and getting a job. Moved to a new town some 500 miles away from my grad school haven (and heaven) and now I not only know nobody -- I'm losing my frickin' DJism! (Perhaps R.E.M. could do a song.)

Yep, joined some activities, tried with no replies on the internet dating scene, and my job has me in a small, semi-seculeded office with not much connection to women.

So with no positive feedback like I was getting in grad school, how did I get my DJism back?
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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ProQD

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Your DJ skills are probably not lacking, you're just no longer in a target rich environment as you are used to. I moved to an area where I didn't know a soul so I took a part-time job working as a bouncer/security. That's a great way to get some connections.
 

Julian

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Sounds like your life fell into the white collar nine to five office hell. Sucks for you man, i suggest a change in careers.
 

WestCoaster

Master Don Juan
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Actually the job isn't bad ...

... I work in higher ed and like it, and yeah, hotties are often in my office -- it's not my job to hit on them, that could get me fired. And there will be more hotties on campus real soon, most a lot younger than me. It's not really blue collar hell, but right now my dating life is hell and I'm trying to upgrade it.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

WestCoaster

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Thanks player; simplicity is sometimes the best answer

Thanks player, I seem to have forgotten a lot of my DJ skills since I was so preoccupied in making sure my new job goes OK, that I have a good place to live, etc., that I neglected some of the DJ stuff.

Simplicity is a good answer.

I think the deal with grad school is women are right at your fingertips -- undergrads and grads -- and even a guy somewhat older can meet dozens of women if he's just nice, funny, and outgoing. The so-called "real" world is a bit tougher, but I appreciate the advice! Thanks.
 
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