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Loosing my mojo for hobbies etc.

andy87

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Good day folks, Im looking for advice regarding not having much motivation for doing anything regarding hobbies etc I'm 34 in good shape a scratch golfer and have a good job, I'm not sure but I think having a LTR girlfriend for the last 3 years is dragging me down, we don't stay together but I have my own place and she's stays regularly, she's been it me the last few months regarding moving in etc, has anyone experienced this with a LTR?
 

svencandy

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Yes.
I used to snowboard, surf and hike regularly, taking random trips whenever the dumps were happening, surf was pumping or the weather was good.
These are all last minute chases.
The ability to be spontaneous reduces dramatically because you have dinner plans or some other ****. Which is enjoyable.
Basically you trade ***** for your hobbies.
 

Kotaix

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Things change. Some hobbies are more compatible with being single. When I was single I was able to do a lot more impromptu hikes and bike rides, but now that I'm in an LTR I do a lot more international travel and less hiking/camping.

I still sail, ski, bike and go to the gym, the only thing that has really changed is the ability to do it at any time of day because I had no one to tell me otherwise. Now that me and the gf are playing the "home game" I've adjusted to other hobbies like woodworking and learning to grow food. My gf supports me in this, but I do sometimes lament the loss of some of the freedom I had.

You have to be willing to compromise, or jump ship if you're burned out. You're still younger so I think it's different for you.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Good day folks, Im looking for advice regarding not having much motivation for doing anything regarding hobbies etc I'm 34 in good shape a scratch golfer and have a good job, I'm not sure but I think having a LTR girlfriend for the last 3 years is dragging me down, we don't stay together but I have my own place and she's stays regularly, she's been it me the last few months regarding moving in etc, has anyone experienced this with a LTR?
Maybe you could literally tell her "I need more time to myself to do my own things (projects/hobbies/goals etc)" and leave it at that.

I think trying to have hobbies for their own sake is a bit silly, but I get your predicament. Sounds like you have lost zest for life. Doesn't have to be a hobby, can be any purposeful or meaninful action in pursuit of goals.

You might also want to look into your T levels, from what I know LTRs can lower T levels quite a lot.
 

2Rocky

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Your Dopamine source has changed. When I was stuck in a bad relationship running miles of trails made me feel great Because I wasn't getting any validation from my relationship.

You are in a Comfort Trap


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