Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Looks do matter on men

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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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asa_don

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You bet they do! Any guy who thinks different is only fooling himself. All the PUA and c&f stuff ugly men try to do only goes so far.

It is looks and the financial stability of a man that attracts women and that will keep women by your side long term.

If you don't believe me....look at all the average (looks, money) and ugly men that can't get a woman.

If looks didn't matter ugly gys would have a tons of chicks to pick from and would be getting laid all the time and wouldnt be looking for new ways and awkward tricks to get women.

Looks matter!
 

TDH

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Who cares u shouldn't look for things to blame because its not much u can do about look. I do agree it matters though it makes things easier but EVERY unattractive male I know that puts effort intogetting chicks gets them. While Im on the attractive side women would get at me but I can't keep em attracted or escalate because I have no game -_-
 

ralphpetersen

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probably does. But look at Neil Strauss. Bald and skinny but with a solid game he gets the girls.
 

PapiChulo

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I ve been called cute and it has got me nowhere. I don't know what I would do with myself if I were ugly, perhaps work at something else that much harder.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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betheman

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of course looks matter, stupid debate, its a question of degree and of who is judging, one woman could think you are a 5 another could think you are a 7, trouble is most men downgrade themselves which limits their own sense of worth, always go with the higher value and assume she is interested.
 

sambwoy

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Defy chicks though.

I have never thought of myself as a cool or awesome person because of how the world sees me, and think I have it bad, and would like to find how I can become one.

Sometimes you have to accept that your eventual girlfriend might not be as attractive as you’d prefer.

These ‘hotties’ can pick whoever they like, and 'hot' guys can get another woman to fall back on- after all society builds them up, and are like ‘hey well you’re hot, you have the world at your feet....et al’, even if in reality they may be stupid and cruel and ignorant and retrograde, but hey ho, life sucks.
 

zekko

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PapiChulo said:
I ve been called cute and it has got me nowhere.
Cute is one thing, hot is another.

I remember a time when this thread would have been deleted. That was back in the day when more people bought into the pickup guru myth that looks don't matter. People seem to have a more realistic view on the topic now, although maybe the pendulumn has swung back a bit too far. Looks will never be as important on men as on women, because men have so many more ways to attain high value.
 

JdelaSilviera

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Yep, Zekko has the most balanced view here. I can attest that to myself, always been considered cute, but when I started being very skinny females disappeared.. After some hard gym work, they are all back again...
 

nismo-4

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Looks matter. No sh*t Sherlock.

asa_don said:
You bet they do! Any guy who thinks different is only fooling himself. All the PUA and c&f stuff ugly men try to do only goes so far.

It is looks and the financial stability of a man that attracts women and that will keep women by your side long term.

If you don't believe me....look at all the average (looks, money) and ugly men that can't get a woman.

If looks didn't matter ugly gys would have a tons of chicks to pick from and would be getting laid all the time and wouldnt be looking for new ways and awkward tricks to get women.

Looks matter!
Don't you all realize that women love value, thus hypergamy is high? Damn any woman feels entitled to a top 10% man, and that the growing number of men using PUA methods is only inflating their "value." Flaking is at an all time high for men, and women have the say on whether or not to choose you. Women tend to date up, while men tend to date down.

The people who claim looks didn't matter are "PUA gurus" that try to sell something. What women care about is the status of your body and bank IN THE NOW. Not the future. No woman knows what a future millionaire or future hunk or future male model looks like.
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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bish0p

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betheman said:
of course looks matter, stupid debate, its a question of degree and of who is judging, one woman could think you are a 5 another could think you are a 7, trouble is most men downgrade themselves which limits their own sense of worth, always go with the higher value and assume she is interested.
Thanks for this post, man. Repped.
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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PapiChulo said:
I ve been called cute and it has got me nowhere. I don't know what I would do with myself if I were ugly, perhaps work at something else that much harder.
"Cute" in general does NOT mean attractive. It is often female code for "not sexually attractive".
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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zekko said:
Cute is one thing, hot is another.

I remember a time when this thread would have been deleted. That was back in the day when more people bought into the pickup guru myth that looks don't matter. People seem to have a more realistic view on the topic now, although maybe the pendulumn has swung back a bit too far. Looks will never be as important on men as on women, because men have so many more ways to attain high value.
After decades of feminism, women are the new men.

Looks matter as much or more to MOST women now. You need to flush that decades old philosophy, "that yeah a man's looks matter, but we are more harsh on women". Nonsense. 20-35 year old women are pickier than you could ever imagine when it comes to looks.

Yes in the 40+ year age bracket, looks matter more for women. But other than that, women judge men more harshly.
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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ralphpetersen said:
probably does. But look at Neil Strauss. Bald and skinny but with a solid game he gets the girls.
1) The above is not really substantiated in any meaningful way. Who knows him well enough personally to vouch for that statement in an objective way?

2) Not all girls like meat-heads. Being skinny is not unattractive for all girls, some girls really like it. I can tell you in my area HB8+ asian girls LOVE skinny white guys. Love them.

3) Some women have a HUGE thing for bald men. It is not unattractive in the eyes of all women.

Initial attraction is looks and always looks. Game only determines how long you can keep them depending on your level of attractiveness to her. The more attractive you are, the less relevant game is in keeping the girl. It takes little effort when she thinks you're pretty hot.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sambwoy

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TillTheEndOfTime said:
After decades of feminism, women are the new men.

Looks matter as much or more to MOST women now. You need to flush that decades old philosophy, "that yeah a man's looks matter, but we are more harsh on women". Nonsense. 20-35 year old women are pickier than you could ever imagine when it comes to looks.

Yes in the 40+ year age bracket, looks matter more for women. But other than that, women judge men more harshly.
I used to have girls at 18 laugh at me, just for existing, when I was at college, and really had such low self worth and unsure about my decisions and marketability to women and subsequently decisions in my life, that I feel incapable or powerless to achieve anything. I posted earlier about how I think that women are 'against' me is down to low self-esteem, but they can be very cruel, well that definitely applies here.

I have struggled breaking the ice with women for years and your theory shows it wasn't for nothing.
 

JoeMarron

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Its a simple formula. The lower your looks the more game, status etc. you need and vice versa.
 

rrrrr

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I know of a hot girl, say a 9, 8 at the very least. She's 25. She's going out with a gangbanger looking dishwasher at the restaurant she works at. I didn't spend much time with him but I get the sense he's a confident dude. A real controller type. He rides his bike to work cause he doesn't have a car.


I know of another guy that I work with that girls say they can't stand the way he looks but he also has an outlandish personality. He's banged 2 hotties where I work and one night we were at happy hour where a hot girl he was banging was like "we're going out right?" Nervously. He just played it cool like he didn't want to talk about it.

Both these guys were small and thin. The Mexican dude not sure if he was attractive it not but both if them were getting chicks based on being assertive men i. believe.
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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rrrrr said:
I know of a hot girl, say a 9, 8 at the very least. She's 25. She's going out with a gangbanger looking dishwasher at the restaurant she works at. I didn't spend much time with him but I get the sense he's a confident dude. A real controller type. He rides his bike to work cause he doesn't have a car.


I know of another guy that I work with that girls say they can't stand the way he looks but he also has an outlandish personality. He's banged 2 hotties where I work and one night we were at happy hour where a hot girl he was banging was like "we're going out right?" Nervously. He just played it cool like he didn't want to talk about it.

Both these guys were small and thin. The Mexican dude not sure if he was attractive it not but both if them were getting chicks based on being assertive men i. believe.

Every girl has their own taste in men and what they find physically attractive. What is hot to one girl might be relatively ugly to another girl. The point is what THAT GIRL finds physically attractive.

Not you.

Not her friends.

HER.

And women have the ability to be as damn picky as they want in society these days. They will always have a flock of men to choose from.
 

floydb25

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Word... But they don't guarantee ****. Girls used to call me very complimentive things in regards to looks, and were very interested in getting physical, but I couldn't sustain attraction for ****. These are two very different things, but still intervined (ie, looks required FOR attraction). If you come on too strong, show too much interest, present no value or challenge, aren't assertive or confident, act like an asexual frog, come off as weak, desperate, insecure, and undesirable, etc, you're not going to last for ****. They might still be turned on by you, and have sex with you, but there will be no sparks, passion or excitement. FWBs and placeholders are common. Certainly no respect or value will be given, or placed upon you.

This works both ways, too. "Hot" girls who showed too much interest, revealed too much, were too "nice" (not being kind or sweet), easy, etc, weren't as exciting or interesting as those who didn't give a ****, had lives, other options, held back, etc. Everyone likes a challenge; something to fight for, and someone of value.

I think its a combination of looks + emotions. And this is for both genders.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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