Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Long Distance Relationships

Paradiddle

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2017
Messages
102
Reaction score
53
Age
31
Why is it a big 'NO'? Not a single member on this forum approves of it and I just wanted to know the reason.
 

Warning!

Do not subscribe to The SoSuave Newsletter unless you are already a chick magnet!

The information in each issue is too powerful for most guys to handle. If you are an ordinary guy, it is not for you. It is meant for the elite few – not the unwashed masses.

image

If you think you can handle it...

If you already have girls calling you at all hours of the day and night, showing up at your door, throwing themselves at you everywhere you go...

Then sign up below.

But if you're just an average Joe, an ordinary guy, no one special – and wish to continue being so – then skip this. It's too much power for you.

oldmanofthesea

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2018
Messages
846
Reaction score
1,249
Age
44
Why do you want to see this girl who lives a long way away from you when you could see another girls who lives closer and who you can see all the time?
 

highSpeed

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2011
Messages
1,041
Reaction score
902
I had one years ago. LDRs cause you sexual frustration, i tell you. One of both is going to cheat.
So does marriage, that's why you avoid both of them like the plague.
 

Augustus_McCrae

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 3, 2012
Messages
821
Reaction score
829
Why is it a big 'NO'? Not a single member on this forum approves of it and I just wanted to know the reason.

-Augustus-
 
Read the 22 Rules for Massive Success with Women. Everything you need to know to become a huge success with women. And it's free!

Jager

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2019
Messages
245
Reaction score
287
Age
28
Why is it a big 'NO'? Not a single member on this forum approves of it and I just wanted to know the reason.
A long distance relationship is only valuable to a woman when she’s unable to nail down a guy for her sexual strategy (a cuck). Maybe she’s 300 pounds, or looks like she fell off the ugly tree with every branch coming down. Whatever the case. She’d never have to see him, so it’s a win-win for her, and she’s ashamed of her body and what she’s doing.

Aside from that, the guy never has sex, or rarely does. He devotes himself to somebody that isn’t even there on a consistent basis. A weak man becomes even weaker, and the relationship serves only one purpose - her validation. That’s the only reason she may even want one.

Plus, there’s no way to verify someone’s identity, much less the gender, in a LDR, because it’s usually online. It’s just a bad situation all around, man.
 

lamath

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
2,528
Reaction score
2,382
Age
38
Location
Canada
Imo a women consciously or subconsciously sees a man in a LDR as man without abundance. So a man accepting to be in LDR lose value/SMV in her eyes.


And lets not forget about the lack of sex this happens to bring.
 

rjc149

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2019
Messages
78
Reaction score
66
Location
NJ/NYC
LDR's fail due to degradation of attraction. The lack of physical intimacy will weaken the emotional bond and cause the degradation of attraction. If the woman is even somewhat attractive, she will have her pick of local dating options which become more and more appealing as her attraction for her long-distance partner inversely falls further and further. Women are emotional beings, and if there is a weak emotional connection, her attraction will be weak as well.

As posted above, men who commit to LDR's subconsciously place their woman on a pedestal, which communicates lack of abundance and low SMV. This is obviously case-by-case, and doesn't really apply to close relationships which get temporarily split up by life events.

LDR's where both partners have relatively low SMV have the highest probability of long-term success.

If you have a strong, close relationship with her, and the distance is a temporary situation (less than 1 year) with a definite end date, then it's not a total no-go. Just understand that the distance WILL degrade the attraction and if she's attractive and gets male attention, you're setting yourself up for some hurt.
 

Paradiddle

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2017
Messages
102
Reaction score
53
Age
31
I reckon there are two types of long distance relationships then? One's where both have only met online or met for a couple of times and then got separated by distance yet have been talking online, sharing feelings and all. Another one; both in a relationship for a remarkable time and then had to live in different places because of their circumstances. I'm asking about the latter. Me and my girlfriend have been now together for a year already. I've come to somewhere to pursue my career and she has gone somewhere to advance in her studies. We have said that we will be together after 2 years because at this pace things will sort out for sure. That's what I'm asking about. We are giving it our best to keep in touch. But do you guys still think that this may NEVER work out? Thank you for your repsonses though.

P.S. One thing I've learnt from my friends regarding LDR is 'Don't tell, don't ask' which means that there will definitely be cheating involved just to satisfy the physical needs for some time only but don't doubt and ask if she's been sleeping with someone and don't confess that you have been doing it as well. How true is this? Any experiences?
 

rjc149

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2019
Messages
78
Reaction score
66
Location
NJ/NYC
It's going to depend on how frequently you can see each other, and whether there is a definite reunion date in the future. I would say once a month minimum, and up to a year maximum.

As for having a 'don't ask don't tell' open relationship, that really depends on you and her. Would you be okay if you found out she was cheating on you for sexual release? Let's say you have a dry spell, would you be cool talking on the phone with her in the evening, knowing in all likelihood that some dude is on his way over to her place to bang her when you get off the phone? While you sit alone thinking about it? In other words, if the emotional attraction in your relationship is low enough to not mind, or where you are actively pursuing other women for sex, then is it a relationship?

If you are in a committed exclusive relationship with her, and you believe there will definitely be cheating, the honest and correct thing to do is to break it off with her. This will leave the door open for a future reunion. Cheating tends to shut that door.
 
Read the 22 Rules for Massive Success with Women. Everything you need to know to become a huge success with women. And it's free!

Fireballs

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 13, 2008
Messages
578
Reaction score
302
Location
Australia
I reckon there are two types of long distance relationships then? One's where both have only met online or met for a couple of times and then got separated by distance yet have been talking online, sharing feelings and all. Another one; both in a relationship for a remarkable time and then had to live in different places because of their circumstances. I'm asking about the latter. Me and my girlfriend have been now together for a year already. I've come to somewhere to pursue my career and she has gone somewhere to advance in her studies. We have said that we will be together after 2 years because at this pace things will sort out for sure. That's what I'm asking about. We are giving it our best to keep in touch. But do you guys still think that this may NEVER work out? Thank you for your repsonses though.

P.S. One thing I've learnt from my friends regarding LDR is 'Don't tell, don't ask' which means that there will definitely be cheating involved just to satisfy the physical needs for some time only but don't doubt and ask if she's been sleeping with someone and don't confess that you have been doing it as well. How true is this? Any experiences?
She will call you everyday at the start, then that will change to a few times a week .. then you will find yourself calling her all the time and she will be busy a lot not return your calls then you will find out she’s bangin a new dude

LDR’s seldom work..
 

LARaiders85

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 4, 2016
Messages
7,741
Reaction score
6,897
Age
35
Any woman that looks halfway decent has way too much temptation, and no woman is going to feel safe and protected long distance.
 

rjc149

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2019
Messages
78
Reaction score
66
Location
NJ/NYC
Yep. The key value-add components that a relationship offers a woman's life (physical companionship and closeness, day-to-day intimacy, safety and security, and oh yeah, regular sex) are missing. Your presence in her life is primarily a phone screen and a date in the calendar for your next visit. The LDR provides little value other than an emotional connection which is also starving and dying from lack of physical contact.
 

Paradiddle

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2017
Messages
102
Reaction score
53
Age
31
It's going to depend on how frequently you can see each other, and whether there is a definite reunion date in the future. I would say once a month minimum, and up to a year maximum.

As for having a 'don't ask don't tell' open relationship, that really depends on you and her. Would you be okay if you found out she was cheating on you for sexual release? Let's say you have a dry spell, would you be cool talking on the phone with her in the evening, knowing in all likelihood that some dude is on his way over to her place to bang her when you get off the phone? While you sit alone thinking about it? In other words, if the emotional attraction in your relationship is low enough to not mind, or where you are actively pursuing other women for sex, then is it a relationship?

If you are in a committed exclusive relationship with her, and you believe there will definitely be cheating, the honest and correct thing to do is to break it off with her. This will leave the door open for a future reunion. Cheating tends to shut that door.
Makes a lot more sense to me now. Thanks
 
Last edited:

Paradiddle

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2017
Messages
102
Reaction score
53
Age
31
Thank you all for your comments and advices. This will help me, I'm sure. Cheers.
 
Read the 22 Rules for Massive Success with Women. Everything you need to know to become a huge success with women. And it's free!

DEEZEDBRAH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 24, 2017
Messages
3,346
Reaction score
2,348
Age
29
Why is it a big 'NO'? Not a single member on this forum approves of it and I just wanted to know the reason.
Zero steady sex. Sacrifice of your biological strategy being, soread the seed, access to abundance of women. Meanwhile she's getting her **** pushed in.
 

Suave88

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 23, 2019
Messages
390
Reaction score
119
Age
40
I had 2 long distance relationships in my life. One was overseas and 24 years old. Nice looking girl I wanted to marry. I met her thru friend because his wife knew the girl. So she did not come out of a bar or overseas mating website. On my first night, we went out. She kissed me and we hooked up and that was pretty much what happened that night in the back of the moskovitch the first time. I later took pictures of her and left the country. I was 29 back then. We wrote back and forward for a year. The year end came and I went back to meet her. The action began on the first night I saw her after my return. She was alone at home and we started to talk in the living room. Then, she said let's come to talk in my bedroom and grabbed my arm and pulled me in. In bed, she wanted to chat, but I knew what she was actually wanting was my cuck. So I started to kiss her and toar her thong to put my spear in it. The rest you all know. For two weeks, I bangged her. While this time, she tested me hard. The testing was so hard, I thought I was being shot at with machine gun fire. I had to be low low low to pass the wire. Anyway, left the country and started to write her back, but then I started to test her in retaliation and she became upset. So the relationship went down. She married and now she is 36. I doubt she is not divorced. I was a member here in the past and that was how I was able to pass of her testing. I learn a lot. This happened back in 2007. The other girl is 13 years younger and she looks good, but she was a former inmate. I wrote to her for a long time. We finally met this year, but she started to ghost the relationship. I needed her help and she ignored me. We were connected on facebook and she unfriend me because I was rude to her. She was ignoring my texts and calls. Plying hard to get. As a result I applied the 90 days rule and it worked a little. Still, I don't know what will happen. I am also looking at new chick I met last year and she is 36. This one is local. Last time I call her, she said she will call later. Today is Saturday and we chat last Sunday. Nothing, no call and no text. Bytch. Sorry, I apologize for my writing. I have very little time to edit my comments.
 

Mauser96

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2012
Messages
4,888
Reaction score
1,903
Why is it a big 'NO'? Not a single member on this forum approves of it and I just wanted to know the reason.


Because they never work out. The inconvenience is too great. One party must move to the other within months.

Been there, done that, never worked out.
 

2Rocky

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
317
Reaction score
227

Your mileage may vary.

I think if you came into an LDR while dating new women frequently it would be really difficult to adapt your mindset. An LDR requires delayed gratification, and I think the hedonistic pursuits of many of the members here don't allow for that sort of thinking.

I'm trying to think about what it was in my life that made it WORK for me. Maybe it was the time apart that allowed me to work on my self and my projects. Maybe it was a feeling of abundance in my dating life that I didn't NEED to get the quick and easy layup. Maybe for both of us, we didn't feel we could "do better". All the same things that make an LTR work.

But I would say in the majority of cases I would not recommend a long distance relationship. Now that we have closed the distance I couldn't go back to long distance.
 
Top