"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Long distance communication

Pinkerton991

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All,

I'm new to this board, so bare with me if I don't get all of the lingo yet (acronyms and such).

I met this girl through the internet (match to be specific) a couple weeks back. We were exchanging messages for 2-3 weeks before we finally met two weeks ago. The reason it took so long was a combination of holidays, my work schedule (70-80 hour work weeks), and her finals schedule (she's a grad student at a local university). We are both 25.

I saw her one more time at a party she threw to celebrate finishing her finals and so forth. I made it a point to talk to all of her friends, didn't follow her around, etc. I would say that things were going well. She flew home the next day and doesn't fly back until mid-January '10. Home is also literally across the country.

Where I am hoping to get input involves communication between now and when she gets back into town. Basically what I am trying to achieve is a balance of communication where her interest stays high, I don't appear eager, and I don't fall into the friend zone. I am trying to limit e-mail communication because I feel its very impersonal. I normally have a fairly effective system for this situation, but the distance variable basically throws everything off.

Any help is appreciated. Thanks in advance.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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vitor

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Hmm I would maybe email or text once a week to keep in touch, maybe a merry xmas, or happy new year text and then around a day or two before she is due to come home call and ask her out. Just control yourself dont fall into her call me, email me, text me trap..
 

Pinkerton991

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vitor said:
.....dont fall into her call me, email me, text me trap..
She's actually tried that a couple times already without success. Most recently, she sent me 5 texts this past Saturday night and I didn't respond to any of them, mostly due to a personal rule I have with responding to "potentials" when I have been drinking (i.e. I don't do it).

I guess I'm also trying to balance this so I don't lose her interest. It was sky-high when she left and it would be nice if I could keep it that high through her flight back....
 

vitor

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The more you say without seeing her the less she will want you and you will say/do something that bothers her more than likely. I am not one to lie but make up a few reasons why you are so busy and how much fun you are having, your skiing, going to a bunch of xmas partys, blah blah blah MR excitment, you are not at home watching DVD's looking at porn waiting for her to come home..
 

Pinkerton991

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Yeah that's what I figured. I haven't really talked to her much since she left, short of two or three texts and an e-mail that I sent Saturday, which was basically geared toward sending some pictures of the recent east-coast snowstorm more than checking in.

My inclination was to basically let her contact me up until she comes back but I wasn't 100% sure that was the right move. You confirmed it. Thanks.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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