"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

LJBF Help

DJBilly

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
Need LJBF Help

Background: I met this girl at homecoming and found out she is an exchange student from Norway(Hottie) I knew the moment that I initially talked to her I wanted to get to know her more, and possibly form a relationship with her. I slowly eased my way into her vision and started to talk to her/txt her/ and walk with her in the hallway at school. I really felt something there, but did not know what she felt at all. One time when we hung out, I made the move of cuddling with her and going for a kiss, i got a positive return of her kissing back but it followed with a " Oh god i can't believe i am doing this". What she said stuck with me for awhile, as our relationship progressed and as we got to know each other and get closer I asked her out. This is the area where the road got rough and now that I look back i know my mistakes. We were in the phase of dating/getting to know each other more intimately, I made the mistake of saying I liked her, and I made the mistake of taking about how she feels about other guys and how she feels about me. I brought the conversation to her, not her to me. Fortunately our relationship and bond ship stuck together, but with a twist, she began to open up to me and told me that before she came to the United States(for only a year) she had a boyfriend that she broke up with because she left, this obviously was frustrating for me and I felt bad because she still had some feelings for him. I told her that she should give me a shot in a relationship and see how we would work out, she kind of agreed with what I said with the fact of me talking to her a lot and telling her that I was there for her. Our relationship got some what closer intimately and we could easily laugh together, her host parents really like me, and she said that she had some feelings for me. We hung out and I became closer to her. She began to tell me how she felt like she was living two different lives, she had her life back home in Norway, and a completely different culture, social life, family and set of friends here in the USA. I kept telling her that I was here for her and that I will talk to her any time(EMOTIONAL TAMPON MOMENT:( ) We hung out three days ago during the weekend and watched a scary movie together, she was clinging to me during the scary moments and I felt that I was the one protecting her. Before I left to go home randomly out of no where she told me that she needed to talk, she continued with telling me for the past week that she wanted to LJBF, i was completely bummed and hated myself thinking I had done something wrong. She told me that it was not my fault, and that several things were going on in her life with, living two lives, having some feelings for her ex, and being caught up in many things. The next day I was alright, I usually do not have trouble getting over girls, but I felt this girl was special and very attractive. I talked to her on the phone about the situation and told her I really disliked the situation, and she told me that we just need to see how we are as friends, I told her that I will all ways be her friend, even though I want to be more. I asked her if there is a possibility of being more then friends ever again and we both agreed that time could only tell right now, but not to get my hopes up(Basically saying NO!! in a nice way). Recently she told me her ex is going to move to another city in Norway and he told her that if she has any other guys or wants to move on she should, she said that she feels he is still kind of her guy, and that she still has feelings for him. I am not in a F****d situation, i want to be more then friends with this girl, and want to know what i need to do to make that possible, right now I am trying to ignore her slightly, it is very hard to accomplish that when i share a class with her, and see her in the halls. For example, i was walking with her in the hallway, but i wasn't acting my I like you self to her, and she kept asking are you okay?, Is something wrong? I know this may be a good sign, but I am not going to rush back to her, I want her crawling to me. I hope i can take this LJBF situation and turn it completely around to be better then what we used to have as a relationship.

Main Questions:

2)What do I do about this girl, do i continue my plan, add something to the plan, or do i just forget about her?
3)How can I change myself, to begin my path towards PUA or DJ.

Update: what should i say when she asks me "what is wrong?" or something of that sort, do I leave her in the dark completely by avoiding all the time or do I talk to her sometimes, if so what do I talk to her about. Also when is the right time to reconvey my feelings to her or take a sexual approach.
 
Last edited:

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Max Power

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 29, 2007
Messages
338
Reaction score
4
DJBilly said:
Before I left to go home randomly out of no where she told me that she needed to talk, she continued with telling me for the past week that she wanted to LJBF, i was completely bummed and hated myself thinking I had done something wrong. She told me that it was not my fault, and that several things were going on in her life with, living two lives, having some feelings for her ex, and being caught up in many things. The next day I was alright, I usually do not have trouble getting over girls, but I felt this girl was special and very attractive. I talked to her on the phone about the situation and told her I really disliked the situation, and she told me that we just need to see how we are as friends, I told her that I will all ways be her friend, even though I want to be more. I asked her if there is a possibility of being more then friends ever again and we both agreed that time could only tell right now, but not to get my hopes up(Basically saying NO!! in a nice way). .
End this situaton now as it will not get better and you will only continue to hate yourself more because of no fault of your own. Why do you want to be friends forever with someone who won't meet your needs? What will happen to you if she starts having sex with someone here in the U.S.? If you continue this pattern in your life you will become like a battered woman who keeps going back to your abuser. This woman is making you hate yourself and you're going back for more.
 

jophil28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
5,216
Reaction score
278
Location
Gold Coast. Aust.
DJBilly said:
Recently she told me her ex is going to move to another city in Norway and he told her that if she has any other guys or wants to move on she should, she said that she feels he is still kind of her guy, and that she still has feelings for him.
^^ Do you understand what actually took place here ?

No? Here is what happened...

She was willing to flirt with you UNTIL her ex told her that he was moving to another city and told her that she was free to date other guys.That statement triggered renewed attraction for him in her because she felt him pulling away and tossing her away in one movement. He is moving on to another city ( which gives him the opportunity to date a whole lot of new women) Her competition anxiety was also amped up . Keeping him is now her focus.
You, on the other hand are "in the bag" , BUT she also knew that you would eventually want to fukk her. That would be too risky and too guilt promoting, so she stuck you in that harmless place called the FriendZone.
That way she can still exploit you "as a friend" without the drama of having you as a rival
for her B/F.
-------

The womanspeek translation of, "..he is still kind of her guy .." is this " ..I am still kind of his girl.."

Dude, you were valuable to her in several ways . She is a foreign student in a strange land and you acted in the role of entertainer, substitute B/f, hang out friend, local tour guide and so on..
This is one woman who will NEVER reverse her decision to LJBF you as long as her EX is still on her mind. IF you continue to be her "friend" on her terms, you will wind up with a mountain of resentment, and the bluest balls.

Save what remains of your dignity and stop explaining to her why you are unhappy with the LJBF deal. SHe is not interested in your feelings. Better still stop talking to her at all.

Toss her back.
 

DJBilly

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
I agree with what you guys said, and I can tell she still feels for him. Thank you for the insight about her wanting more even tho she said it made her feel better about a possible relationship. I am freezing her out now, with the occasional hi if she says anything because I don't want to be a complete as*. I am sticking with I don't give a **** about her attitude. I acctually have another girl lined up, hopefully I am succesful. I picked her using some DJ tips, I did notice my mistakes which will thin out with practice. Thank you guys again.
 

Badmannaz

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2005
Messages
782
Reaction score
18
Location
entering the 4th quarter....
Hey my man..this scenario was similar to mine....i had a girl from class but she wasnt foreign exchange...she was just a transfer from another college like me....and i ended up playing the role of "Entertainer" i.e "F*ck Buddy...after class was over she was living another life doing other things (i wont speak on them) but basically she wasnt the girl i hooked up with and wanted more from..

so from my experience and you going down an extremely SIMILAR PATH

HEED MY WARNING....STOP THINKING ABOUT HER...DONT SAY HI UNLESS SHE SAYS HI BACK....AND DONT EVER GET BACK WITH HER...NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TOO...

just move on my man....i promise you....its gonna save you a lot of mental stress that you could be using to find a HOTTER SMARTER COOLER chick who's into you...and the truth is...YOU WILL!!

thats if you havent found her alread ;-)
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

DJBilly

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
If she says hi to me or what's up, what should I respond with? Keep in mind I don't want her to get the idea that she is alpha or I am her Kleenex box for emotional moments.
 

jophil28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
5,216
Reaction score
278
Location
Gold Coast. Aust.
DJBilly said:
If she says hi to me or what's up, what should I respond with? Keep in mind I don't want her to get the idea that she is alpha or I am her Kleenex box for emotional moments.
AS difficult as this is, you need to come to accept that she is still emotionally attached to her ex B/f, her actions say so. THis one just did not work out for you.
When a woman puts you in the FZ she is saying to you that she has no emotional, romantic or sexual feelings (of any significance) towards you, BUT she likes having you around for her CONVENIENCE, but there is little reward for you.

THis is an unacceptable deal(or it should be ) for a man, but probably not so bad for a douche. You need to make a conscious decison - which am I ?

IF you decide that you are a man, then your path is clear. You act cool but polite toward her. You may like to exchange brief greetings occasionally but you always walk away first.
Be smart enough to respect your own value and stop giving your thoughts and hopes to a woman who is not doing the same to you.
 

DJBilly

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
Even tho it ****ing sucks because she is a HB9, I just have to be a douche and make her realize that I don't care for her b.s.(her ex) I am only 17 so I have many years to practice and make my game better so a situation like this doesn't happen. Thank you for your input jophil.
 
Top