Okay, say you screwed up and some chick LJBF'd you, but still you think to yourself "if I don't find someone I like better, I'd like to give it another go with this one." It's a common strategy to cut off contact with her for a while so those friend-feelings she has for you die off. How long should you wait? Is 4 months good? How likely is this strategy to get you a clean start when you try her again? I'm not asking how likely it will be that you'll bag her next time, but how likely it will be that the friends issue won't be in your way.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
LJBF and cooling off period
- Thread starter Kron233
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Well, the old advice is to "Go Find/**** Ten Other Women". If you start pursuing other women and have other women in your life, she may come to rethink her original opinion of you.
Realistically, though, if she LJBF'd you directly, the cooling off period is probably going to be more like 6 month to a year. That's enough time for you to grow enough so that she might see you in a new light. That's been my experience anyway.
Realistically, though, if she LJBF'd you directly, the cooling off period is probably going to be more like 6 month to a year. That's enough time for you to grow enough so that she might see you in a new light. That's been my experience anyway.
Yeah, right, I definitely will be pursuing other women. I'm just contemplating how long I should wait before giving her another shot. It would be immensely satisfying to me to turn things around with her, even if it didn't work out, since she made it seem like there's no hope. Just the knowledge that I pulled it off would be SWEET and fulfilling. I'm into the challenge aspect, but I don't wanna go back too soon and blow it permanently.Telos said:
By the way, she didn't always think of me as a cuddly plush-toy. I'm pretty sure she didn't when I was coming in her ass using only a little saliva as lube.
Sounds painful man. She must have a pretty big, gaping ass.
Waiting around for a woman is not something DJ's do. Don't wait. But I will say that since you have had sexual contact with her in the past, she may not view you as innocuously as a plush toy, it's more likely that she is just quite simply no longer attracted to you. Give it a few months and try again, I guess.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
LMAO, but nah, it took me about 6 tries to get it in and she complained that it hurt for days after. Oh well...Telos said:
I certainly don't disagree, but the girl lives in another city and I might be going there for another reason sometime in the not too distant future. It's not urgent though and I wanna time my trip with when I'll be able to try getting with this girl again.
Yeah, I think that's it. You see, I wound up taking her for granted and I didn't do any of the stuff I would normally do to keep someone interested. I believe she found her general experience with me to be pretty "blah." Being a typical woman, she thinks there's something unalterable about how she feels about me, not realizing that the reason she views me as she does is just because of how I acted and if I wait long enough for her to loosen up just a little, I can change her mind. She seems to think of "clicking" with a person as something magical and mysterious or some BS, as opposed to the reality of the situation which is that it has everything to do with how I behave. I just want there to be a day when I'm telling her about how it was destiny that we'd cross paths again or some nonsense and watching her eat it up.
Trajhenkhet01
Don Juan
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I've tried this before and all I got for my trouble was a kiss and one make out session.