"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Literally no time for each other

Effington

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I'll try to keep this short, I finally made a move on a girl this weekend that I'd had a thing for, and am very glad at the results. We've been very good friends for years (she moved away for a time, but recently returned) and in that time I grew a pair while managing to stay out of the "friend zone". I'm actually really into her and I am pretty sure it's mutual.

The problem is, I work full-time 9-5 with grad school 4 days a week 6pm-9pm, and she just got a job working 7 days a week, she also lives 90 miles away. Literally, she has two days off until January 1st: Christmas with her family, and New Year's eve, with me. For a new thing to actually progress, that is not very much time together. I call her after class a couple times per week, but she gets up for work at 4am, and besides, at that point it's 10pm, I haven't ate dinner or attempted to study.

Think it's worth it? The night school for me will be a long-term thing, I will be in school for at least 2-3 years more, and I know once she pays off a note she had for school, she will re-enroll to finish her degree, so I don't see the time factor getting better very soon.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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joekerr31

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you can't have a relationship with a woman who you can't even find the time to go to a movie with.

sounds like things just weren't meant to be right now - as hard as that is to hear.

best thing to do might be to put her in the friend zone. tell her that you'd like to be friends and to pursue something more if your lives ever allow for it.

i mean, theres no point fooling yourselves that you are something more when you haven't been dating and you only see each other once a month or something.
 

aliasguy

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PlasticSurgeon is a surgical resident. He's got EXCEEDINGLY limited time. And HE seems to be able to generate some smoke.

Get her over at your place after you two are "finished" with whatever you have to do. (I don't think that, even in grad school, that you have to work on stuff EVERY evening.) Work out some time. There is always enough time for you to do what's important to you.

Do it or don't. (Do HER or don't.)

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STR8UP

Master Don Juan
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I feel ya man. It sucks to be always either busy or tired. Add a crazy schedule on the other side and it's tough to get to know someone.

But 90 miles away? That's an LDR.

Chick I am seeing lives about 30 miles away and that's far.

Like Joe said....if you can't find time you can't have a relationship.
 

Mr.Positive

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If you are seeing her on New Years Eve, give her a New Years to remember!!

I say go for it, you only live once. Don't get emotionally attached, but you will regret down the road thinking "if only I had the time..."

Life's short, tap that @ss. Even if it's only once a month, that one night a month would be worth it, IMO.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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