"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Letting her down easy

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These ladies are college aged.
Haha nice. and good for ya! Noticed you said you were looking for a LTR in another post. Also looking in that same age group? In which case, yeah def need to be careful haha

and @AttackFormation .. no doubt man. Sorry if I came off the wrong way.. Just kinda pet peevish for me when I see people make statements that generalize all women the same.. It's kinda like a PUA mindset ..

You go to a diff country/travel a bit.. You realize all women are not like college chicks/ sexually active chicks in AMerica lol
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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wifehunter

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Haha nice. and good for ya! Noticed you said you were looking for a LTR in another post. Also looking in that same age group? In which case, yeah def need to be careful hahal
Yes, I have my wits about me, not drinking or anything. I'm completely clear headed and sober, and with plenty of time to think! I also have friends in high places, as it were!
 

BeExcellent

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There is always the little white lie approach. You could say to her "you're very sweet but I'm seeing someone" or "You seem like a nice person but I'm more interested in someone (insert qualifier here that she does not have)", or something like that. Let's say she's 21. Just say you are really more interested in someone closer to your own age. If she flirts and asks why, tell her you really want someone with similar years life experience as you. Something she can't overcome.

It's less in what you say than how you deliver it. I'm the same way frankly. If someone is not my cup of tea I am very sweet about it but I smile and tell them gently. I make it a habit never to discourage someone from approaching me as I wish to reinforce the confidence to approach someone else (and I think being ugly to someone who has paid me the compliment of being attracted and making the approach is inconsiderate.)

I am gentle but direct myself to handle this sort of thing. Maybe that is more your style if you don't want to tell a little white lie.

The thing that I will most often do is smile sweetly and say "You are so sweet to notice me. I'm sure you are a lovely person. I'm just not feeling it...but I really do appreciate the compliment" I am caring and genuine when I say this to a man I am not interested in. Men have complimented the way I handle this repeatedly and some have told me that they appreciated my honestly and the way I treated them with kindness, courtesy and respect. It's still a rejection. But it's a gentle rejection that appreciates the other person's humanity.
 

wifehunter

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There is always the little white lie approach. You could say to her "you're very sweet but I'm seeing someone" or "You seem like a nice person but I'm more interested in someone (insert qualifier here that she does not have)", or something like that. Let's say she's 21. Just say you are really more interested in someone closer to your own age. If she flirts and asks why, tell her you really want someone with similar years life experience as you. Something she can't overcome.

It's less in what you say than how you deliver it. I'm the same way frankly. If someone is not my cup of tea I am very sweet about it but I smile and tell them gently. I make it a habit never to discourage someone from approaching me as I wish to reinforce the confidence to approach someone else (and I think being ugly to someone who has paid me the compliment of being attracted and making the approach is inconsiderate.)

I am gentle but direct myself to handle this sort of thing. Maybe that is more your style if you don't want to tell a little white lie.

The thing that I will most often do is smile sweetly and say "You are so sweet to notice me. I'm sure you are a lovely person. I'm just not feeling it...but I really do appreciate the compliment" I am caring and genuine when I say this to a man I am not interested in. Men have complimented the way I handle this repeatedly and some have told me that they appreciated my honestly and the way I treated them with kindness, courtesy and respect. It's still a rejection. But it's a gentle rejection that appreciates the other person's humanity.
Actually, thats on the money... I'm seeing 6 plates... I should be honest and tell her I'm exploring all my options.
 

grayclif

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If she's 40 I'll tell her I don't date women over 35. If she's 35 I'll say 30. Whatever fits the situation.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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wifehunter

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If she's 40 I'll tell her I don't date women over 35. If she's 35 I'll say 30. Whatever fits the situation.
Thanks, I would rather be honest, or keep my mouth shut.
 

grayclif

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Thanks, I would rather be honest, or keep my mouth shut.
You want to be honest but you won't tell her you're not attracted to her. If you would've just been honest and told her you lacked attraction for her from the get go you wouldn't have had to post here to find a workaround for being honest.
 
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wifehunter

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You want to be honest but you won't tell her you're not attracted to her. If you would've just been honest and told her you lacked attraction for her from the get go you wouldn't have had to post here to find a workaround for being honest.
I was just looking for different angles/perspectives.

It's complicated (isn't it always with the ladies)... But thanks anyway!
 
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