Learn from Women's Own Tricks

[Sergio]

Five stars from me.

 

[Ofus]

ump bay

 

[The Main Event]

Originally posted by seloifter
What did you ever get in return for being overly helpful to a girl? A smile? A hug? And how *excited* were you to get it? Pretty damn happy, right?

USE THIS! Make women do things for YOU! Ask THEM to go pick something up from McDonald's for you, make THEM carry your ****. ---Just remember not to do this unless you've already created at least SOME interest beforehand, otherwise they'll just get irritated with you and think you're a lazy jerk ---. And when they're done serving you, reward them with some tiny insignificant thing, and see how much they appreciate it!

This part is worth emphasising.

I used to think that doing favours for people earned you big points. I'm sure that back in your AFC days you did, too.

Fact is, the opposite is true. Getting someone to do favours for you is the best way to establish a permanent pattern (and a good way to keep a woman interested).

I'm sure there's a theory out there that makes some sort of sense... whether it's a case of her rationalising her own behaviour or of submissive behaviour being a turn-off or whatever. The important part is that I've had consistently good results getting girls to do favours for me, and I've had consistently bad results when I've done favours for them.

And when you think about it, that's really not a bad deal at all.


I am
The Main Event.

 

[XANEUS]

great concept! It is definitely true, and it applies much more broadly than you imply. It can be used on as small a thing as specific lines, and as big a thing as the entire frame of the relationship, and I've found it effective virtually 100% of the time...

cheers
-X

 

[seloifter]

I'm surprised to see this post bumped after 5 months, but I wanted to comment on The Main Event's post, about why "getting others to do stuff for you" creates a pattern......

I read an article somewhere (I forget where) about "investment" (with dating)...... where the more you invest in a relationship (this even applies to friendship!), the harder you will work to keep it strong. That's only logical, of course.
If you had your life savings invested in a small store (I don't know why you would, but work with me here), wouldn't you do everything within your power to make sure that store became succesful and didn't die?

Well, when you've invested alot in a relationship (not especially money, could just be working hard), you don't want that investment to go to waste, so you will try a little harder to make it work. At that point, you've invested even more! It's a terrible cycle......

Just my two cents about a possible explanation for this phenomena......

 

[seloifter]

futhermore, about submissiveness being a turn-off...... that's obvious because women have instinctive desires for the "alpha male"...... they want to be slapped around like *****es and have a real man controlling them (I say this very loosely )

 

[The Main Event]

All that's true. I was simply throwing a few explanations up and mooting which one was dominant. But the bottom line is, this stuff works. It works for women, and it works for us, too.

Once again, a phenomenal post.


I am
The Main Event.

 

[Acrylonitrile]

Re: Re: Learn from Women's Own Tricks

I used to think that doing favours for people earned you big points. I'm sure that back in your AFC days you did, too.

Fact is, the opposite is true. Getting someone to do favours for you is the best way to establish a permanent pattern (and a good way to keep a woman interested).

I'm sure there's a theory out there that makes some sort of sense... whether it's a case of her rationalising her own behaviour or of submissive behaviour being a turn-off or whatever. The important part is that I've had consistently good results getting girls to do favours for me, and I've had consistently bad results when I've done favours for them.

And when you think about it, that's really not a bad deal at all.

Women will like doing favors for you because people need to be needed.

Women will not like you doing favors for them because people do not like to feel needy.

I believe that the appropriate way to handle things is to create an effective balance between the asking and giving of favors. Asking for excessive favors makes one a burden--giving excessive favors makes the recipient feel needy. Therefore it is important to both give and receive -- by receiving you let a woman know she is needed, and by giving you let her know that you have something to offer in return.

Acrylonitrile

I am NOT
The Main Event.

 

[Evil-Rom]

I like this post ALOT. Everything said applied to me.

BUMP!

 

[The Main Event]

Re: Re: Re: Learn from Women's Own Tricks

Originally posted by Acrylonitrile
Women will like doing favors for you because people need to be needed.

Women will not like you doing favors for them because people do not like to feel needy.

Undoubtedly true, as a principle of general human interaction.

What we're discussing here is the consequences of favours in the context of romantic interest. Women don't like to feel needy, that's true. But more importantly, they like boneless supplicants even less.

I believe that the appropriate way to handle things is to create an effective balance between the asking and giving of favors. Asking for excessive favors makes one a burden--giving excessive favors makes the recipient feel needy. Therefore it is important to both give and receive -- by receiving you let a woman know she is needed, and by giving you let her know that you have something to offer in return.

It so happens that I can think of plenty of other ways to demonstrate value (that is, "that you have something to offer"). After a quick glance through the archives, some of them will suggest themselves to you.

As far as doing favours goes, I found out a long time ago that a woman subjected to such behaviour puts you firmly under the heading of "chump". And that's true regardless of what your motives are.

She's had to put up with so many guys doing exactly this that it triggers an almost automatic reaction. It lumps you in firmly with the "I fantasise about being with you but I'm not brave enough to come out and say it" brigade.

It's a case of the bad 99% of kiss-asses ruining it for the remaining 1%.

Acrylonitrile

I am NOT
The Main Event.

Well, of course you're not. I am. You shouldn't let that stop you from trying, though!


I am
The Main Event.

 

[Ofus]

Originally posted by seloifter
-"I think she likes me!!" Remember thinking that? When a girl, in whom you had NO interest in whatsoever, started to show interest, suddenly your mind burst with wonder. Just because you THOUGTH SHE LIKED YOU, YOU STARTED TO LIKE HER!
I have had this happen to me countless times. About 95% of the girls that I had crushes on, I only had crushes on them because I thought they had crushes on me in the first place! However, the most important thing is that I THOUGHT they had crushes on me. I wasn't SURE. And this drove me crazy. I was suddenly incredibly interested in her, and tried my hardest to make her like me. Already I was her puppet.
USE THIS! Make women think "He's interested in me!" and then make them think twice "or is he....?" by the time they're wondering "or is he?", they've already started to be interested in you. However, this interest will fade the MOMENT that they are CERTAIN you are interested in them -- unless you play your cards right. Timing is everything, mistery is even more.

I agree. Thinking a girl is interested in me has always tended to make me interested or more interested in them. But now that I am no longer AFC, I know it is my role as a man to lead. And when I'm interested in a girl who acts into me NOW, I go for the # close.

Wouldn't you say that a girl knows for certain you are interested, once you get her #?

 

[The Main Event]

Re: Re: Learn from Women's Own Tricks

Originally posted by Ofus
Wouldn't you say that a girl knows for certain you are interested, once you get her #?

It's a huge hint, but there's still an element of self-imposed doubt. I can tell you that as someone who's spoken to his female friends on this very topic.

In fact, I was talking to a friend of mine, Samantha, just last week. She had a dinner date with a boy she'd met recently who had asked for her number. You don't have to tell me that a dinner date is a bad idea... hey, I'm just recounting the story!

When I referred to it as a date, she played the concept down. No, they're just friends. Yeah, he'd asked for her number, but that doesn't mean anything! People exchange number all the time. I know "exchanging" numbers is lame... hey, I'm merely the narrator!

Fast forward to yesterday. I spoke to Samantha again, and she's now officially "dating" this boy. Well, I could have told her that almost ten days ago, and I'm sure she had a fair idea he was interested, too.

But she wasn't certain. She wasn't certain enough to tell her friends about it, and she wasn't certain enough to view it as a sure thing. Because she doesn't want to tell everyone that he's officially interested in her and then face the remote risk of turning out to be dead wrong, she imposes an artificial layer of doubt.

It's when things get physical (or you get chumpish) that she's left with no doubt whatsoever. But she still doesn't have a proper appreciation of the magnitude of your interest...

...and if you play your cards properly, it will be a long time before she does.


I am
The Main Event.

 

[Digital Mastermind1]

seloifter i am going throught his right now i guess its because i havent had it for a while( 5 years) and thanx forn helping me see this otherwhise i would not of realized how canniving women can be and how crude and dishonest they can be too .


im still learning .....

 

[Lt dan]

ive been doing this for a while but my cause and effect have been somewhat messed up. im constantly getting chicks to do stuff for me but i always just thought that they were doing it cuz they were diggin me. they are, but i didnt know that it actually made them like me more. thats cool

 

[astrojaevko]

BUMP!!!

 

[dookie]

Dude, kino is killer... A girl used it on my (the right way) recently and even tho she is not like a 9 or something, I was thinking about her... sexualy not romantically. I think it would probably be the other way around for most girls if you used kino on them. Back to the story, so I'l talking with a friend, and this girl comes into his department. Says hello to him. In a condacenting tone, I said, where is my hello? She look at me, said, hi!... I like your shirt. She turned around, I said, I like your pants (with a smile). She started rubbing her ass in circles and said Thanks! (Its so much easier to interact with girls who are flirty). During end of the shift, we are standing in line, she is done turning in her items. As she walks by, we make eyecontact for about 2 secs. She runs her hand lightly down my arm and she said Byyeee with a sexy smile. Instant boner... hehe. I wish we weren't in presense of other coworkers, else I would have used some stronger kino...

 

[jiza101]

Does this mean the girl has to be an AFC since when we were afc only us fell for it, and not the real men. Arnt women natural players ?

 

[fbplayer06]

Pure player. The correct reactions to common feelings within growing DJs.

Thanks!

 

[Jariel]

Fantastic tip and so well explained!!!

5 stars from me and I'd like to nominate this tip for the Bible!

 

[muttley]

BUMP!!!

this post is SOLID GOLD... read it read it read it!! everything explained here has happend to me...time to switch it!!
great post :woo: