So my ex had a bad day yesterday. We texted back and forth throughout the day, she's telling me how crappy her day was. Apparently she's been fighting with her mom too. So at 11:45 at night she texts me, what are you doing? I reply that Im just watching TV before bed. She says she's sitting in the parking lot of CVS and is debating whether she should go home? I call her to see what's up. So she tells me briefly about the fighting with her mom. I tell her tomorrow will be better, don't let one day get you down, etc. Then she proceeds to tell me ok, I guess I'll go home. Talk to you later and hangs up. Very strange? No? Something tells me she was fishing for something else.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Late night text from my Ex
- Thread starter bignick79
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
That was my impression and that's exactly what I didn't want. Just what I need to get dragged back into her drama. At least from the outside I can keep my distance if need be. I'll be her friend, because we were always there for each other and listened to each other, but getting back together, or even just sleeping together, there is always a price to pay for that!
If she had at least come out and said that she wanted to come talk or even if she said I want to come over and bang the hell out of you, at least I would have respected her honesty. Half our problems were started cuz she doesn't open up about what she wants. I have to guess, constantly having to guess whats on her mind. She's willing to tell me all these other problems and such, but not anything about us. She ended it with me, so if she is thinking about getting back together, it's my feeling it should come from her. It's not for me to say I'm thinking we should try again. She made her choice, if her mind has changed, she needs to suck it up and spit it out! No pun intended! Lol
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
bignick... couple things here:
1) Don't expect women to come right out with what they want. A huge part of game is learning how to read women and know what they want/expect. You are gonna deal with that with every single woman you date/hook up with. This case here was pretty easy to decode. Whether she wanted to come over, or wanted you to meet her out somewhere, that was as easy as it gets.
2) Don't give her the power. You say "if she is thinking about getting back together, it's my feeling it should come from her". You need to take the lead here. If you want to be with her, make the move. If you don't want to be with her, her making a move shouldn't mean anything to you. What you are saying is this is all her call. YOU be the leader here. Don't be dependent on her.
3) Somewhat related to my point above, and more of a question. You say that if you get back together it should come from her, yet your post before that one, you said you would be her friend "but getting back together, or even just sleeping together, there is always a price to pay for that!". So, which is it? Are you realizing you shouldn't get back together because of of the price to pay? Or are you waiting for her to come crawling back?
1) Don't expect women to come right out with what they want. A huge part of game is learning how to read women and know what they want/expect. You are gonna deal with that with every single woman you date/hook up with. This case here was pretty easy to decode. Whether she wanted to come over, or wanted you to meet her out somewhere, that was as easy as it gets.
2) Don't give her the power. You say "if she is thinking about getting back together, it's my feeling it should come from her". You need to take the lead here. If you want to be with her, make the move. If you don't want to be with her, her making a move shouldn't mean anything to you. What you are saying is this is all her call. YOU be the leader here. Don't be dependent on her.
3) Somewhat related to my point above, and more of a question. You say that if you get back together it should come from her, yet your post before that one, you said you would be her friend "but getting back together, or even just sleeping together, there is always a price to pay for that!". So, which is it? Are you realizing you shouldn't get back together because of of the price to pay? Or are you waiting for her to come crawling back?
flashpoint
Senior Don Juan
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- Jul 28, 2012
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^^^what he saysPDubb75 said:bignick... couple things here:
1) Don't expect women to come right out with what they want. A huge part of game is learning how to read women and know what they want/expect. You are gonna deal with that with every single woman you date/hook up with. This case here was pretty easy to decode. Whether she wanted to come over, or wanted you to meet her out somewhere, that was as easy as it gets.
2) Don't give her the power. You say "if she is thinking about getting back together, it's my feeling it should come from her". You need to take the lead here. If you want to be with her, make the move. If you don't want to be with her, her making a move shouldn't mean anything to you. What you are saying is this is all her call. YOU be the leader here. Don't be dependent on her.
3) Somewhat related to my point above, and more of a question. You say that if you get back together it should come from her, yet your post before that one, you said you would be her friend "but getting back together, or even just sleeping together, there is always a price to pay for that!". So, which is it? Are you realizing you shouldn't get back together because of of the price to pay? Or are you waiting for her to come crawling back?