"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Late bloomer

iCatch

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so i just had a convo on aim with a really hot girl and she asked why i don't have a gf. she said a lot of girls in school have a crush on me and i'm one of the best looking guys in the school (yes she really said that) i was always awkward looking in grammar school and freshman and sophomore year. junior year people told me i got hot but i didn't believe them. i thought they were just mocking me. senior year girls started flirting with me like crazy and i had no idea why.

so my question is, has anyone ever experienced this? i was always awkward looking grammar school through sophomore year. now that i look at pictures of myself i do look a lot better. how do i get over the mentality that i'm the same awkward looking guy i used to be?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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TheBucketOfTruth

Master Don Juan
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How do you get over it? Look at yourself in the mirror and see what everyone else now sees. Go out there and take advantage of the situation. Obviously someone has noticed that you're matured nicely, and things have spread from there. A few popular or older girls thinking you're hot can all of a sudden make the whole school think you're hot. Use this chain reaction to your advantage.
 

#41

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Seriously -- you had positive feedback from a neutral source telling you that people think you're hot/sexy/f-able, whatever. That's more positive feedback than most people will ever get from anyone not directly related to them.

If that doesn't boost your self-confidence, nothing will.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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iCatch

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thanks guys. i'm definitely gonna work on this. i was just always this awkward looking kid that i got used to not getting girls.

it's like a fat guy getting really fit. in his mind he's still a fatass while he's actually really ripped.

it's just hard to get that mentality out of my head since i thought the same way for a long time before my appearance changed
 

eaglez1177

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iCatch said:
so i just had a convo on aim with a really hot girl and she asked why i don't have a gf. she said a lot of girls in school have a crush on me and i'm one of the best looking guys in the school (yes she really said that) i was always awkward looking in grammar school and freshman and sophomore year. junior year people told me i got hot but i didn't believe them. i thought they were just mocking me. senior year girls started flirting with me like crazy and i had no idea why.

so my question is, has anyone ever experienced this? i was always awkward looking grammar school through sophomore year. now that i look at pictures of myself i do look a lot better. how do i get over the mentality that i'm the same awkward looking guy i used to be?
Are you kidding me bro? Is this honestly what your worrying about right now? You just got a MAJOR confidence boost from a really hot chick, why the hell are you freaking out about the past? Who gives a sh*t about what you looked like when you were younger! Thats all in the past so it shouldnt affect you at all. Live in the present and realize that your a good looking guy and you should be living up to what everyone says you are.
 

lalahaha

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lol i remember i had this too, people would ask me out, even to prom in junior high school and i would think they would be mocking me or playing a practical joke. to get over it you need to adopt or rather develop the mentality of someone who is worth something and he knows it too, read through the bible it will help you out
 

iCatch

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bump

gonna be a college freshman. tips on confidence?
 

Exhumed

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How can you give someone tips on confidence? You're the fvcking MAN. Speak loudly and clearly and confidently, move like you own the campus, don't be afraid to strike up conversations with people when you first get there. That's what I plan to do, I'm also an incoming college freshman :) I however had to spend time and effort for my appearance to improve.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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