thecreature
Don Juan
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How many people know someone who couldn't take the loss and loss the will to live ?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Know any who has killed himself over a gal?
- Thread starter thecreature
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
MartinARMT
Don Juan
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I came close. But it wasn't just because she left, it just added to the fire. I was already headed down the path and was the reason she bailed.
Sadly a friend of mine killed himself about a year ago after separating with his wife. They also had kids together.
I don't know what went on in his head as I never got to talk to him about it, but he looked like he was rebuilding his life from what I could tell and then out of nowhere he ended it. I was so shocked as this was a guy who had everything going for him. He was such a good looking guy, extremely popular, magnetic and had girls lining up to be with him.
I have to confess that I too had some dark thoughts of this nature after my most recent break up. I've never hit such a low point in my life, but it absolutely crushed me and I needed to see my doctor for depression. It's crazy now I look back as I feel a lot better, but the pain I felt at the time was absolutely crippling. I remember how my pulse would pound for hours, I could feel my heart in my chest and this constant churning in my stomach. I can definitely understand why someone going through that would want to end it.
But if you just push through it, it does go away.
I don't know what went on in his head as I never got to talk to him about it, but he looked like he was rebuilding his life from what I could tell and then out of nowhere he ended it. I was so shocked as this was a guy who had everything going for him. He was such a good looking guy, extremely popular, magnetic and had girls lining up to be with him.
I have to confess that I too had some dark thoughts of this nature after my most recent break up. I've never hit such a low point in my life, but it absolutely crushed me and I needed to see my doctor for depression. It's crazy now I look back as I feel a lot better, but the pain I felt at the time was absolutely crippling. I remember how my pulse would pound for hours, I could feel my heart in my chest and this constant churning in my stomach. I can definitely understand why someone going through that would want to end it.
But if you just push through it, it does go away.
thecreature
Don Juan
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Some people aren't strong enough to pull themselves out. Bet his ex wife felt like crap.Jariel said:
I don't know any guys who killed themselves over a woman (although I too have come pretty close myself) but I did sleep with a woman who killed herself over a man. I slept with her before she killed herself in case you're wondering.
She was a female AfC.
The depression that comes with rejection was overwhelming. I am in a better position having done some hard studying and major red pill swallowing. Whereas before, life was about trying to find the 'right' woman to settle down with, I now live without any expectations nor care for finding a woman.
She was a female AfC.
The depression that comes with rejection was overwhelming. I am in a better position having done some hard studying and major red pill swallowing. Whereas before, life was about trying to find the 'right' woman to settle down with, I now live without any expectations nor care for finding a woman.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
JohnChops
Master Don Juan
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My buddy didn't kill himself but he is now clinically depressed because of his girl snapping him in half. He's so sheltered now its crazy. He just doesn't even live like he used to. Very sad to see.
there was a guy who was only 21 who i knew he worked behind a bar , his girl left him or something of this nature......he hung himself only to be found by his poor mum , in all fairness i came very close about 10 years ago when things and brain overload got on top of me .....luckily i realised someone was out of wack went to the doctors.
not a very pleasant experience at all , it just fvcks you up in a way that is scary . without a good network of people it can last a long time.......
i still get the guts churning feeling when i worry , or like all the shyt with the ex , but once the switch goes off in my mind and my mind is made up to get through something i will do my upmost to see through till the end.
anyone going through this as we speak , you will need to get to the docs and seek advice , and remember things can always be worse.
take care of your mind guys
not a very pleasant experience at all , it just fvcks you up in a way that is scary . without a good network of people it can last a long time.......
i still get the guts churning feeling when i worry , or like all the shyt with the ex , but once the switch goes off in my mind and my mind is made up to get through something i will do my upmost to see through till the end.
anyone going through this as we speak , you will need to get to the docs and seek advice , and remember things can always be worse.
take care of your mind guys
Mr_Stinky
Don Juan
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This is why males need spaces like this forum. So they can get support and not succumb to the urge to end it all. If people know there is a light at the end of the tunnel (as provided by forums like this) there is a better chance they will get better
Vantagepoint34
Master Don Juan
My friend Beardme321 can get her back. But he was close to.
It all comes down to how you deal with your break up and your mentality to begin with. A lot of people I know adopt this victim mentality or push blame onto others...this is WAY too common on this site. When they get dumped, they claim the world is against them, life sucks, women are all evil and manipulative and either lay down and let it beat them or they continue their life feeling bitter and refusing to trust again.
Other people accept what happened and take some responsibility for it. They recognise that they became complacent, too needy, and that they became less attractive to their girlfriend...or they accept that they got into the wrong relationship, ignored too many red flags, gave her too much power etc. These people can learn from these painful experiences. Even though they go through the same pain and despair as everyone else, they eventually reach a point where they lift themselves back up and start to rebuild themselves, stronger and wiser before.
I like to think of myself as one of the latter types. I know I fvcked up in my relationship. Although she did some disrespectful and hurtful things to me, I played my part in that too. It's not her fault I changed, I became soft, complacent and needy, and it's not her fault she lost attraction for me and didn't want to be with me any more...that's my fault, in the same way a chick getting fat and letting herself go only has herself to blame when men don't find her attractive any more.
But I took a time out and really looked at why things got so screwed up. I remembered the strong, confident and cool man I was at the beginning of the relationship, the one who whisked her off her feet and she fell in love with, and then I compared it to the needy, goofy lapdog I became at the end of the relationship. I vowed that I would not only get back to my old self again, but I am going to become the best version of myself I have ever been!
When you have a goal like this to focus on, it gives youa reason to wake up and it gives purpose to the pain you're feeling. Each day spent working on becoming a better man is a day well spent. Whereas if you just spend your days getting drunk, stoned, playing games, watching movies and wallowing, each day you sink further into a rut. You also lessen your chances of ever meeting someone else and moving on.
Other people accept what happened and take some responsibility for it. They recognise that they became complacent, too needy, and that they became less attractive to their girlfriend...or they accept that they got into the wrong relationship, ignored too many red flags, gave her too much power etc. These people can learn from these painful experiences. Even though they go through the same pain and despair as everyone else, they eventually reach a point where they lift themselves back up and start to rebuild themselves, stronger and wiser before.
I like to think of myself as one of the latter types. I know I fvcked up in my relationship. Although she did some disrespectful and hurtful things to me, I played my part in that too. It's not her fault I changed, I became soft, complacent and needy, and it's not her fault she lost attraction for me and didn't want to be with me any more...that's my fault, in the same way a chick getting fat and letting herself go only has herself to blame when men don't find her attractive any more.
But I took a time out and really looked at why things got so screwed up. I remembered the strong, confident and cool man I was at the beginning of the relationship, the one who whisked her off her feet and she fell in love with, and then I compared it to the needy, goofy lapdog I became at the end of the relationship. I vowed that I would not only get back to my old self again, but I am going to become the best version of myself I have ever been!
When you have a goal like this to focus on, it gives youa reason to wake up and it gives purpose to the pain you're feeling. Each day spent working on becoming a better man is a day well spent. Whereas if you just spend your days getting drunk, stoned, playing games, watching movies and wallowing, each day you sink further into a rut. You also lessen your chances of ever meeting someone else and moving on.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
VikingKing
Banned
I do. About a year and a half ago I was working for a landscaping company who did a lot of landscaping for the wealthy area of the city I lived in at the time.
The owner and my boss is a pretty good guy, hardworking, very fair, and he would higher guys on probation for drug related problems (not me).
I suppose he wanted to help some of these guys out because if you have a felony drug record, your kinda fvcked.
Anyways there was this one guy, I worked with him for a couple weeks. Not every day but I got to know him he was a recovering heroin addict. Well guess what, he had a child with some whovre who probably also did drugs.
One day I walked into work, my boss comes up to me he looks all tore up. Now this man is at least 40, but he is one of the hardest workers, even though he is the owner he busts his a$$ like a laborer, I to this day have mad respect for this man.
He said so and so is dead. I asked what happened.
I guess this dude was trying to get back with his babies mama, who was probably stringing him along, she eneded up calling the cops.
The guy went into the back yard, pulled out a pistol, stuck it in his mouth and squeezed the trigger.
Now granted, he had other issues in his life, but ultimately I think he was in a very insecure place and he allowed the female that was in his life to affect him that much.
You know he maybe had some issues with substance abuse, but he seemed to be on the right track when I worked with him. He worked hard. Such a waste.
The owner and my boss is a pretty good guy, hardworking, very fair, and he would higher guys on probation for drug related problems (not me).
I suppose he wanted to help some of these guys out because if you have a felony drug record, your kinda fvcked.
Anyways there was this one guy, I worked with him for a couple weeks. Not every day but I got to know him he was a recovering heroin addict. Well guess what, he had a child with some whovre who probably also did drugs.
One day I walked into work, my boss comes up to me he looks all tore up. Now this man is at least 40, but he is one of the hardest workers, even though he is the owner he busts his a$$ like a laborer, I to this day have mad respect for this man.
He said so and so is dead. I asked what happened.
I guess this dude was trying to get back with his babies mama, who was probably stringing him along, she eneded up calling the cops.
The guy went into the back yard, pulled out a pistol, stuck it in his mouth and squeezed the trigger.
Now granted, he had other issues in his life, but ultimately I think he was in a very insecure place and he allowed the female that was in his life to affect him that much.
You know he maybe had some issues with substance abuse, but he seemed to be on the right track when I worked with him. He worked hard. Such a waste.
VikingKing
Banned
That happens a lot. the number one cause of death in the Marine Corps is suicide. Number two is motorcycle accidents.GS750 said:
Never get married before you go on tour, or have a girlfriend. You will come back to her the way you left her, freshly fvcked.
This one guy in my unit came back from Iraq and his bank accounts were cleaned out, and his girlfriend left him.
Starfvcks 64
Senior Don Juan
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And somehow I bet she benefitted greatly from the "emotional trauma" of it all.GS750 said:
Support, attention, etc.
I mean, she had every right to do what she did because it was selfish of him to go to Iraq and leave her alone.
Guys are such jerks, right ladies!
Ladies PM me if you want a nice guy!
PeasantPlayer
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2013
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- 3,068
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People take relationships to seriously....
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Peaks&Valleys
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2013
- Messages
- 1,956
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- 355
I was roommates with a girl who's ex boyfriend killed himself because of her. It happened before we met, and she never talked about it. I found out from one of her friends. When I met her, she was a cool chick and good looking but you could tell that down deep there was something wrong with her. When it came to relationships with guys, even though she was pretty young at the time, early 20's, she was very standoffish, and the only relationships she would have with guys were as friends. When I had heard what happened it kind of made all of the pieces fall into place. I don't know the details about their relationship, but I do know that he ex killing himself did traumatize her. It was too bad, in all aspects. Nothing good ever comes out of it.
countwoofoolah
Don Juan
I find it sad how little respect some of these woman have for armed forcesnoobolgy said:
but yeah agreed , don't go off when you got pvssy on the couch
switch
Master Don Juan
i personally know a guy who was gonna jump to see his maker.
another ive heard who wanted to idk like eat a lot of sleeping pills or drug himself.
and i had a classmate back in the mid-east who was found dead in a drain pipe due to heroin overdose.
(yeah heroin addiction can reduce you to 30kgs,so you would fit a drain pipe)
my junior in college wanted to do it ....havent sen the guy for years so might have done it.
if anyone wants to go dodo on his own ass,better to find someone that he knows and talk about everything for a while, cry cry and then get your balls,become a man and find a new purpose in life.
another ive heard who wanted to idk like eat a lot of sleeping pills or drug himself.
and i had a classmate back in the mid-east who was found dead in a drain pipe due to heroin overdose.
(yeah heroin addiction can reduce you to 30kgs,so you would fit a drain pipe)
my junior in college wanted to do it ....havent sen the guy for years so might have done it.
if anyone wants to go dodo on his own ass,better to find someone that he knows and talk about everything for a while, cry cry and then get your balls,become a man and find a new purpose in life.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.