"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Keyboard Jockey's Anonymous - Report here.

Cure

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 7, 2009
Messages
304
Reaction score
5
Location
London
I am one.

I know the theory, I’ve read dozens of guides and articles on pick up, I know everything from starting a conversation to escalating to sex, I am very confident about my looks, in good shape, dress well, can make conversation etc.

There's nothing missing except one tiny piece of the puzzle which is that despite looking and thinking like a PUA, I can’t act like one. I suffer almost total approach anxiety, and the longer it goes on, the worse it gets.

I see a hot girl, I know what to say and how to say it, but I walk by or let her walk by without doing anything, and I do this over and over again. I’ve done it at least twice today already.

The first step to overcoming a problem is admitting to it, so this is me admitting to the internet/community that I'm a key board Jockey, good in theory but in practice, paralysed to the point where I’m probably worse than an AFC.

Know a lot of PUA theory?
Spend hours reading PUA material and postings?
Offer advice/comment on others dilemmas without personal experience?
Never apply any of your knowledge in real life?

Post here, admit to it, and hopefully those of us who are in the same boat (I suspect a lot of us) can learn something from each others experience.

Cure.

(and yes I’m well aware of the irony of trying to start a discussion/help group for guys who spend to long on the forum and not enough/no time in the field,)
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

bukowski_merit

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 27, 2007
Messages
1,313
Reaction score
160
Location
Tri-State
Not to hijack your thread... but im just curious... you say you have approach anxiety when you see a hot girl... do you have this same anxiety when they're just average or less? or even talking to a guy? or a UG? Do you have approach anxiety in general social situations or just when it's a hot girl?

im pretty much the opposite.... i seem to only be able to talk to women im really attracted to... and can't seem to find the desire to talk to others.
 

Cure

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 7, 2009
Messages
304
Reaction score
5
Location
London
No worrys mate, its a valid question.

I find, like you, I have no desire what so ever to approach women I dont find attractive. But there seems to be almost nothing in between not wanting to talk to a girl, and wanting her so badly I cant approach at all for fear of the world ending.

I have very little problem with guys or in general situations, Id even say im pretty outgoing.

It's weird, I know I can approach random hot girls and hit on them, doing that was what lost my my virginity, but the longer Ive gone without doing it the less able I am to overcome the boundary.

Cure.
 

thecurtainfalls

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 20, 2006
Messages
285
Reaction score
11
Location
Northern Cali
You need to allow yourself to fail. Period. Your ego is still trying to shield you far too much from a blow that is ultimately not that damaging.

I think there's a common misconception among guys that "failing" in their attempt to pick up a girl has these monumental reflections on their character and self-worth. I think there's also a misconception that it's this huge, horribly awkward thing to get shot down by a girl and that she will forever laugh at the memory of you trying to pick her up. The truth is that it is incredibly common and not that big of a deal. As long as you came off sincere and confident instead of creepy, you will also be respected for your ability to reach for what you desire.
 

Warrior74

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2008
Messages
5,106
Reaction score
230
Hi I'm Warrior74 and I am now a keyboard jockey. lol.

Mainly because I have two girls on my team (one full time and one part time), and I've become complacent. Between my health issues and working on my business I haven't been out in the field for a while. My part timer is moving on, and my full timer is busy with her kids, so I guess it's time to get off my butt and back in the field.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,806
Reaction score
10,039
I'm a keyboard jockey in the sense that I am currently in a (very) LTR, so I can't/won't do pickup right now or spin plates. My girl has thus far proven herself worthy of my interest, so I am not going to reward that by cheating on her.

But that doesn't mean I haven't applied any of what I learn here. One of the things I take from this forum is the motivation to improve myself and be a better man. And it helps keep me motivated to keep the workouts up, which I have slacked off on at times in the past.

I've also had my share of successes and failures with women, so I think I can talk from experience from time to time. It's also interesting to gain insight on mistakes I've made in the past, and on what I've done right. And sometimes, relationships don't last forever, so someday I may have to apply more of what I've learned here.
 
Top