"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Keeping LTR IL

I.A.F.Y.B.

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You can tell her. "We don't need to talk every day to show our feelings." Say, your busy doing things and ect.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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itishe

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I've been with my girl for 18 months, and she has done everything on the list you created:

-said she loved me first
-offered to buy my plane ticket to meet HER family in Ohio
-buys me stuff all the time
-texts me good night, etc.
-drives north every weekend (4 hours) to visit me and stay at my house

I know she's deep into me, but I can never trust a woman 100%. I want to know how you keep the IL high in a semi-long distance relationship (ie 4-5 hours away)? I won't be the far away for long, as I'm moving back to my original college city next month so get ready for Spring Semester (1 hour away from her).

Basically for now though I just got my phone and talking to her until I give her orgasms on the weekend.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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itishe said:
I've been with my girl for 18 months, and she has done everything on the list you created:

-said she loved me first
-offered to buy my plane ticket to meet HER family in Ohio
-buys me stuff all the time
-texts me good night, etc.
-drives north every weekend (4 hours) to visit me and stay at my house

I know she's deep into me, but I can never trust a woman 100%. I want to know how you keep the IL high in a semi-long distance relationship (ie 4-5 hours away)? I won't be the far away for long, as I'm moving back to my original college city next month so get ready for Spring Semester (1 hour away from her).

Basically for now though I just got my phone and talking to her until I give her orgasms on the weekend.
Well, looks like you posted this in october so, I don't know if things have changed.

Has this always been a long distance relationship?
 

TheDoctor

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BUMP

Great Post I.A.F.Y.B. I just wanted to bring this to the top of the pile so others can look at it. I've been reading a lot about LTRs of late. I know this thread has helped me tremendously. I have oneitis and have gone AFC on my girl but am battling hard to get out of the trenches.

Tons of great advice / tips here to keep IL high with your girl.

My case: we see each other/ talk to each other too much. We get sick of each other and we haven't really been putting too much effort into making each other happy. We've been just running through the motions. Things have gotten stale on every level.

Need to get things back on track. Any advice?
 

Jon55

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Awesome thread! We need more relationship advice here.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Jon55

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This thread has saved me many times. Bump!
 

handle

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This and the other topic are pretty cool but I don't understand how a lot of these things apply to a LTR... "She always calls you to hang out" "Helps you do stuff / Do stuff for you" "Is affectionate around you and other people" etc... Those are good signs for any relationship, but aren't they kind of hard to gauge in a LTR because you aren't physically together much? I guess maybe I'm a bit confused because those seem appropriate for a normal relationship.
 
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