"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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K guys I actually have a serious Q

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AFCinBC

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Ok, How do you deal with all the lame ass losers out there? Maybe its where I live but theres no clubs, no social outlits besides bars and I have worked in many stores and I find all the ppl I meet DULL BORING STUPID all of the above and they all suck ass, I hate feeling like a prick when they try to tell me about there problems and I'm like.. hey I dont care you can deal with them or kill yourself.... because no one ever does deal with there problems its pathetic and if I tell them how to solve a problem I know they wont do it anyway. So I just ****ing save my breath nod and walk away. It still gets to me though its like I'm the only sane healthy self confident guy around anymore I mean no one holds EC everyone is insecure damn I hate this world anyone have similar problems.

I live in montana so social anxiety is a very common thing for us thers more cows than ppl ..... and the ppl are very clicky cause everyone has known everyone else since there grandparents where ****ing their sheep. I have lived here 20 years and met at the MOST 10 ppl who have any semblance of education or intellect. Drinking is what 90% of the population does here. thats it everyone has some sort of dependancy problem I mean even I had one untill recently I grew some balls and said how about I just be myself and **** everyone else.... If their hot... :p

I'm just lookin for some sort of idea what do you DJ's do ??? snub them?? talk to them about what????? Its like everyone is sooooo scared of change they will do anything to NOT change like crabs in a bucket they pull everyone down with them????
Ok im just ranting but still this is a very common thing for me I look around and I just wana vomit.
Better??
 
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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D

DJ_Dork

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Wow, it seems like you're better than everyone you know. Take over the freaking town boy!
 
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cactus3178

Senior Don Juan
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Your best option is to learn how to make paragraphs ;) That said, since your 20, you probably have a job and a car, right? What's to stop you from moving to a larger town?

It may do some serious good to try another place out for a while, maybe longer. My skew on it is that you'll never experience all that you can by staying in one place all your life. I'm not telling you to become a train hopping hobo, but your young (single too I assume)....move for a while. Why the hell not?
 
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AFCinBC

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I got 2 DUI's when I was 17 I havnt been able to drive since then the System has my balls in a death grip and wont let them go that was 3 years ago and I still have to go to chemical counciling... and my counciler said he dosnt think i have a dependancy problem and he still wont let me stop going.

Thanks for the advice guys I'm thinking you may be right, there is nothing in this town for anyone who isnt 70 and ready to die a peacefull death.

The city I live in has under 40k population
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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cactus3178

Senior Don Juan
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Well, if you do move, nobody says you have to make it permanent. I understand that things cost money, but you wouldn't be hurting anything by trying it out.

F*ck, even go visit some friends from out of town if you've got some. Sounds like things are stagnant in your current digs. Good luck, bro.
 
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