Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Just an FTF or Potential Girlfriend?

montybrown

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How do I tell if the girl that I'm messing with is just an FTF or a potential girlfriend? We both do things bf/gf would do like hold hands, hug, kiss, etc. We just had sex last night. But she refers to me as just a friend. I know she talks to other guys too and I always joke with her like she does the same **** with them and she reconfirms with me that she isn't like that and when I told her something about how all the other guys she talks too she says "I've been with you all the time don't I spend more time with you?" something like that to try to reconfirm me that I'm above the rest. But how do I know if we're just in the friends zone and we fvcking or if she really wants to be my girlfriend?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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aliasguy

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Just enjoy the time with her. Don't worry about whether she wants to be your "gf" or not. See other chicks, just like she sees other guys. Don't get all hung up. Have fun. Be cool.

This is an OPTIMAL situation. Appreciate it.




There's a story about a bird flying through a blizzard. He freezes and falls, landing in a field. A cow walks by and sh*ts right on top of him. He thaws out from the warmth of the manure, and is saved. He becomes so happy he begins to sing. A cat hears him singing and comes over and eats him up.

MORALS:

1. Everyone who sh*ts on you is not necessarily your enemy.

2. Everyone who gets you out of sh*t is not necessarily your friend.

3. If you are warm and happy in a pile of sh*t, then KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.


You, my friend, need to heed the third moral. Have fun. Don't get "exclusive." Don't hassle the girl about it at ALL. And get one or two more going. (She probably already does this - and that's ok.)
 

Lexie

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Don't try to figure it out, ask her. Guys spend too much time analyzing things...cut to the chase and be straight forward.
 

PlaysToWin

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It sounds like she's doing to you exactly what we teach guys to do in the early dating stages to girls they are interested in. Not really a bad thing at all. Just don't overanalyse, don't get onitis, don't get clingy, don't push things further and just have fun and enjoy yourself.
 

yogy

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I am in the same situation :woo: , but it's going on like this for about 2-3 months.I was thinking breaking up with her but now after reading your replys I think I'll keep her :D
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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MooseGod

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lol @ aliasguy... my mom used to tell me that analogy all the time as a kid.


But yeah, as some of the other guys said, don't worry about it. You almost sound like a woman griping about lack of commitment. Why are you so ready to give up your freedom?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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montybrown said:
How do I tell if the girl that I'm messing with is just an FTF or a potential girlfriend? We both do things bf/gf would do like hold hands, hug, kiss, etc. We just had sex last night.
Until you define what you want in a LTR, you'll never know. Guy's typically never define things beyond wanting to have sex with a woman. Sex alone is not enough of an identifier because you could have sex with a friend, a f-buddy, a ONS, an acquaintance or even someone else's GF. Until you define those unique things that you want specifically in a relationship, you'll never know if you're with a woman worth leading down that path.
 
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