"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Judging Interest Level

ladodger32

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Alright there is this girl Iv been hanging out w/ for a while, and Iv gone out w/ her once, the problem is Im havin trouble determining if she views me as a friend or in a more romantic way...is there any way to ask or find out how she sees me w/o acting completely AFC? Thanks in advance.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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banGbro

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Come to her, take her hands (optional), look her in the eyes for a moment, and ask her "Would you like to kiss me?"

If she says no tell her "I didnt say you could; I just thought you had something on your mind."

If shes not sure, tell her "Lets find out" and kiss her on the lips softly, no tongue.


See how it feels and hows her reaction. If you feel you liked it do it again. Start touching her too, hands, arms, face and hair, back. Take her to your place and continue.
 

NorPacWolf

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JJMcLure

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Don't waste time worrying about what she wants (most times they don't know anyway), you have to pursue what you want. Take it in the direction you want - leading will come across as confidence (what chicks want). Men lead, chicks follow.

You clearly like her, so you need to escalate - through kino and then a kiss test. A kiss on the lips is how you determine her interest. Never ask her 'how she sees you'!
 

Snow Plowman

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You know the best way, kiss her. If she does then great if she doesn't then just get the interest higher and then try again.

Point I'm trying to make is Escalate, Escalate, and keep escalting and if she stops you then you know where her interest level is at. (Don't get that stopping mistakened for LMR which you can just do LMR techs to bypass, which happens during foreplay)
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Poll

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If you want to know the answer fast, just touch her boobs, if she slaps you, then she thought of you as a friend, if she grabs your package and starts caressing it, then you are in.
 
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The truth is you need to keep spinning until you find the IOI. I found that this weekend without trying at a conference I went to.

I met this girl early on. At lunch time we reconnect; she asks if I'm sitting with anyone and saves me a seat.

She offers to get me silverware and refill my drink.

When talking we have great eye contact; she asks what movies I like; she notes "we're very similar." We really do have pretty good chemistry.

Later she emphasizes some points by touching my arm and leg. She at one point rubs my leg a few times "to make a point." I lean in and do something similar, the old Kino on the back, side, arm thing.

She comes outside with me during a cigarette break. She invites me to go because she knows I'm a smoker and would want a break between sessions.

She asks for my number.

She gives me big hug and kiss on cheek at end of conference, noting how great it was to meet me and how I need to come out to visit her (in Arizona). We talk today; she returns calls.

All in all, a nice girl and a nice positive experience without the usual run-around when you're trying to force something with someone who is only semi-interested or skeptical. The truth is, there is little doubt when she's interested. Don't waste too much time forcing the issue after the initial attempt to generate and confirm interest. At the same time, I set up date with another girl that I ran into Sunday night and helped a bit with her term paper (she's in college). I'm not getting one-itis, but I am enjoying the initial connection.
 
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