I am a slightly jealous girlfriend, I read an article on this website that said jealous men should play it cool and not attempt to restrict their girlfriends behaviour, ie: lunch with ex, or male strip club, and she would respect him. Would you say this approach can work in the reverse? Or will "letting" my boyfriend go to strip clubs and lunch with past flames just give him opportunities that he can't resist?[/COL:nervous: OR]
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Jealous girl seeking advice
- Thread starter marianne
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
far from average
Don Juan
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- Apr 22, 2006
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Post a picture.
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/7294/2896/1600/mepic.0.jpg
there's the link to my picture, didn't know how else to do it. It's huge for some reason. Anyways I know I shouldn't hope for any serious advice, but if you could that would be great.
there's the link to my picture, didn't know how else to do it. It's huge for some reason. Anyways I know I shouldn't hope for any serious advice, but if you could that would be great.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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- Nov 15, 2004
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- 11,680
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- 4,877
Forgive the horny newbies on the site. Many of them are still trying to land a woman.
As for strip clubs, they're only entertainment. I have no problem with my woman going out for some entertainment with her friends. Let's face it, most women won't get undressed and squirt whipped cream all over themselves for their men.
I don't know what goes on in male strip clubs, but I'm sure he wouldn't do any of the 5hit those guys do just for your entertainment.
I'm guessing that was on the main site since most of the guys here (including me) don't agree with her keeping an ex in her life. An ex is an ex for a reason.
As for strip clubs, they're only entertainment. I have no problem with my woman going out for some entertainment with her friends. Let's face it, most women won't get undressed and squirt whipped cream all over themselves for their men.
I don't know what goes on in male strip clubs, but I'm sure he wouldn't do any of the 5hit those guys do just for your entertainment.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
spider_007
Master Don Juan
it all depends on how weak your man is, and how much he likes you.marianne said:
Thank you, Desdinova. So are you saying I should just play it cool if he vere wants to have lunch with an ex? Because there's a school of thought that says thats inappropriate, and that I should go with him. I myself have no interest in male strip clubs, or in even speaking to my exes, because I am only interested in my BF. Should I expect the same from him?
:crackup:far from average said:
The quality of the advice you will get here will be proportional to your HB rating. The hotter you are the dumber the advice, the uglier you are the smarter the advice.
Therefore if you are one ugly chick, you will get such gems as: Stick with your man because you can't do any better.
or
If you are a fine babe HB9.99 then you will get gems such as:\
"What time can you be at my house? Don't forget to pick up the condoms on the way and some beer for after sex relaxation.
I just saw your supposed pic and I love those eyes. Does tha t model come with a mute button?
K
My compliments. You have noble features - apperance.
Acting cool about meeting exs is one thing but everyone knows it is not OK, right?
You cant freak out and you cant let him do this. Is he going out with other women because he has reason to believe that your relantionship is not so hot? Is he looking for "insurance" - backup? If so...let him know your interest level is high.
Check your intuition...does he love you and respects you? If not so strong...bad.
Acting cool about meeting exs is one thing but everyone knows it is not OK, right?
You cant freak out and you cant let him do this. Is he going out with other women because he has reason to believe that your relantionship is not so hot? Is he looking for "insurance" - backup? If so...let him know your interest level is high.
Check your intuition...does he love you and respects you? If not so strong...bad.
Thanks also, spider. He seems pretty strong. What brought all this on was that he was camping last month, and hung out with these guys, and two girls that were with them. Apparently the girls gave my BF their phone numbers and said they'd like to hang out at the lake again sometime. (my BF has a boat) What freaked me out was that he didn't tell me about it for a month! He said he thought I'd freak out, but he never called them and didn't plan to. I wouldn't have been so irked by it if he had just told me at the time, when he keeps secrets it feels like he's ashamed or something, and if he has no reason to be, why keep secrets?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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I'm not saying that at all. Read again, an ex is an EX for a reason.
However, I feel the need to inform you that if you haven't been with him for very long, don't expect him to abandon an ex too quickly. AFCs like to hang onto useless, 5hitty things that are of no use
But, if you've been with him for a while (2+ months), you have every right to say something about him showing attention to someone who doesn't deserve it (the ex).
Do you know what the circumstances were for them breaking up?
You would have freaked out matter what, like you are doing now. Get over it. If you keep acting like this he will think you are a possesive bytch and he will lose respect for you. Act cool and he will be able to develop trust in you.marianne said:
K
ha ha actually I've been with him for 3 years! The lunch with ex thing is just an example, there isn't any immediate threat of it happening. I guess I'm actually pretty lucky. He hasn't talked to any of his exes, as far as I know. Plus his dad says I'm the prettiest girl he's dated, and I seen pics of his last GF. Woof!
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
PS I'm going to mexico with my friends this weekend, (my bF was invited but apparently the resort doesn't allow dirtbikes so he declined.) He's going to the lake with his friends. I keep picturing all these women throwing themselves at him, but I'm not gonna say anything. Just be cool, right, like it ain't no thang?
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.