I've been pursuing girls like crazy and they've been reciprocating my interest.

[Accension]

I recently made a thread about how I thought that this whole game thing is very misleading: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=174688

I've thought for a long time that it's quite AFC to really pursue girls.
Is this correct?
Because I've basically been texting, calling, sending E-mails and just showing them I want them - it's working.

However, shouldn't our theory be against this happening?
Because I've pretty much had a girl stay over at my house every night this week.
What the hell is going on. Am I no longer an AFC and this is why it's easy now?
This whole success thing is just as confusing to me as no success.

 

[zekko]

Because I've basically been texting, calling, sending E-mails and just showing them I want them - it's working.

However, shouldn't our theory be against this happening?

A lot of seduction ideas contradict each other. The trick is to learn when to use each one, and how to blend them. That's why you need the social calibration and the experience in the field.

In your case, you're saying (I think) that you should consider yourself the prize, be indifferent toward women, and make them chase you. Those ideas all have their value and their place but I don't think taking that approach strictly is going to work very well for most men. Because on the opposite side of it, men are the leaders and the hunters. They are the ones who initiate the interaction, that's what makes them men. That's what makes them masculine.

The vast majority of the time the guy who lays back and acts cool is going to get passed over for the bolder guy who approaches IMO.

 

[SandHawk]

I agree with what's Zekko is saying. It's a matter of mixing/matching and social calibration.

And there comes a time that you will have to chase the girl. That's the entire idea of love, it's bi-directional. She shows affection towards you, and you return it. It's a matter of her chasing you, and you chasing her. If you only be all laid back and cool and unresponsive, she'll pass up on you and she'll go for another guy.

However, many guys who have problems with women are overly chasing the girl. In the initial scouting phase, the girl wants to see at her terms if she likes you, and you on your own terms to see if you like her. Go in too fast, and you'll scare her off. Come in laid back and chill, she'll notice you're not clingy and that you're cool and will allow it. And the moment she's hook onto you, she'll eventually expect you to seek contact too, because otherwise she will lose interest too.

It's a matter of a game. It's giving and taking. I still pursue the girl that I'm considering LTR material, but I will not give in to anything she wants from me or appear on demand. Yet I still show my affection and told her I'm in love with her as well.

 

[bukowski_merit]

As i told you twice in the other thread - unless you're very good looking and/or have money/status - You're going to have a really hard time trying to get women to pursue you. Once you get a harem of women and a rep with women - THEN women MAY chase you (since you'll be too busy to chase them) but that's a long ways away from where most men on here are.

I have NEVER advocated sitting back and being passive about pursuing women. Nor have i seen that doctrine practiced on here. If you want her - GO FOR IT! Be sexual, let it be known that you're into her (without saying it if possible).... However, i think there's a thin line between pursuing and chasing. I don't think i ever chase women, because i think that's going all out. I put it out there, let them reciprocate to it, then build from there.... I don't push... but i don't expect her to pull.... i expect her to stand still while i walk into her.... if she backs up - then i pull back (sorry if this makes no sense lol)

Just follow the basic guidelines of not being clingy/needy, not letting her get away with disrespect, passing her sh!t tests, lead, punish bad behavior/reward good behavior, don't overtly try to be controlling, being ready to move on if needed.... and most of all: screening for what you're looking for!

And again, don't chase.... but it's fine to pursue....I refuse to chase. I will approach, I will show interest. But I will not play the “if you want me – chase me” game. Any woman playing that game is an AW. Field tested.

 

[In$tinct]

However, many guys who have problems with women are overly chasing the girl. In the initial scouting phase, the girl wants to see at her terms if she likes you, and you on your own terms to see if you like her. Go in too fast, and you'll scare her off.

Unintentionally field-tested that this weekend. It doesn’t matter how high their initial IL is, come in over confident, thinking that the rules no longer apply, and before you know it… You are sitting at home alone with that “No Sh!t!” feeling.

Live and Learn

 

[Ease]

I recently made a thread about how I thought that this whole game thing is very misleading: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=174688

I've thought for a long time that it's quite AFC to really pursue girls.
Is this correct?
Because I've basically been texting, calling, sending E-mails and just showing them I want them - it's working.

However, shouldn't our theory be against this happening?
Because I've pretty much had a girl stay over at my house every night this week.
What the hell is going on. Am I no longer an AFC and this is why it's easy now?
This whole success thing is just as confusing to me as no success.

Come back when you've had a relationship longer than 6 months.