"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Its staring me in the face, but I still need to hear it

combustiont

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This will be a little long winded but i'll do my best to clip it down.

Met someone pretty randomly online and we BS'd a while, flirted, etc, and she invites me to a hockey game she has an extra ticket for. Cool, free hockey game, I wasn't much worried about her at that point.

We talk, shes with her friends, but we're joking/talking/flirting, even though at the time I thought she was married. I figured it'd be a chase the prize and move on since I thought she was married and all.

We keep talking for a while, hit another hockey game and what not, keep talking. This goes over a couple of weeks. Finally, one night she txts me and says shes bored, I say the same. We live an hour apart, I said "lets meet halfway and get a bite to eat". We go out, get a bite, go over to a friends house for a few (friend of mine), and finally I told her she can crash at my place or roll home, she rolls home with me, we hook up.

This carries on for a few weeks and we start "dating" and shes telling me she misses me, cares about me, etc etc... but something feels off.

Fast forward a few more weeks. I just let things linger, i've been busy with work and working out (and trying to find a new job) so I haven't much been chasing females, not to mention I just can't afford to be going out. We're supposedly a "couple" and whatnot. Cool. I like the girl, has a temper, has looks, has personality, but its not like I won't leave her.

So fast forward to now. I see this girl once a week, for maybe 2-3 hours. Usually a Sunday afternoon. She tells me shes falling in love with me, always thinking about me, always misses me - but if she really missed me, she'd make an effort to see me. On top of this, I still haven't seen her place (she lives an hour or so away). Something isn't right, i'm being hidden, or someone is hiding something from me.

After... i'm not even sure how long its been... two, three months since we started talking, I can't even get an invite to her place, especially if we're dating, I can't drive over and get a piece?

So I call her out last night, asked why i'm isolated from that part of her life, and if shes keeping options open thats cool because I have girls still calling me. She tells me thats ridiculous because shes always texting me and all, talking to me and whatnot but if someone really misses you or wants to see you, like someone else said in a similar thread, they'll make an effort to see you.

Also, she flirts. She'll flirt with damn near anyone. I mean, I flirt too, but at the same time its some **** when its someone you know, right in front of you, thats some **** that I don't like to let fly.

What the **** is up in my head? Someone talk some sense into me.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Furyguy

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If something doesn't 'feel right,' then it probably isn't. Your gut is usually right.

You really give a **** if she's hiding you from someone else? Why? Because you don't want to share her, or are you just upset about the lack of full disclosure?
 

combustiont

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Furyguy said:
If something doesn't 'feel right,' then it probably isn't. Your gut is usually right.

You really give a **** if she's hiding you from someone else? Why? Because you don't want to share her, or are you just upset about the lack of full disclosure?
Don't know. Maybe the former because if shes with other people, I should be out there too, and the latter because... yeah. Tell me whats up.
 

Furyguy

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I don't know dude. You sound really incongruous right now. You say she's not putting in effort but she's given you multiple free hockey tickets, driven out to have dinner with you, agreed to go home with you later that night, and was the one to bother making the initial effort to set things up on that night in the first place.

Imagine it's the same girl, same situation, but instead of "I love you, I want to be with you" from her every day, it's "I don't want something serious, let's keep this casual and fun." Would you feel any better?


Lastly,
i'm being hidden, or someone is hiding something from me.
It is entirely possible that she is doing you a favor here dude. I have been in this situation. It is when she lets you into her fvcked up life that the bull**** really starts flying. There are any number of situations which could cause her to be "unavailable" for the time being (bat**** crazy Christian conservative parents are a good example of this...). You don't need that bull**** in your life just yet.
 

combustiont

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Furyguy said:
I don't know dude. You sound really incongruous right now. You say she's not putting in effort but she's given you multiple free hockey tickets, driven out to have dinner with you, agreed to go home with you later that night, and was the one to bother making the initial effort to set things up on that night in the first place.

Imagine it's the same girl, same situation, but instead of "I love you, I want to be with you" from her every day, it's "I don't want something serious, let's keep this casual and fun." Would you feel any better?


Lastly,

It is entirely possible that she is doing you a favor here dude. I have been in this situation. It is when she lets you into her fvcked up life that the bull**** really starts flying. There are any number of situations which could cause her to be "unavailable" for the time being (bat**** crazy Christian conservative parents are a good example of this...). You don't need that bull**** in your life just yet.
Wow, you know thats a great point. She does have a really ****ed up past from some of the parts i've heard. Also the early stuff like the tickets and all that... another good point. Actually a lot of this makes more sense now.

Awesome.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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DonJuan11

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incongruous: Not in keeping with what is correct, proper, or logical; inappropriate: incongruous behavior.
 

john siegal

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Well...you know what they say:.... "Like Attracts Like...!"

Most be something you're putting out there...

:cry:

PS.
...good luck with the Job Hunt. I would Never go after or get involved with a women (other than a FB) without having some cash rolling in.
 

JEFE

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man, it seems you are falling for this girl.......You are caring to much, just be cool an go with the flow.

let her know that you are a man that looks for what he wants and if she is not putting out..... some body else will.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Tony T

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Funny but just a few threads ago i read you putting down someone for what you determined to be irrational behavior..and now i read this??


LOL!

Man...you REALLY need to get some Psycho Help....and fast!

No insult intended but they've got medication for Obsessive Compulsive behavior....See a Dr. Right away.

Please, we all don't want to see another LA Fitness episode take place!!!
 
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acw

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Bro...don't tell us that you are falling for something like this....lol~!

:eek:

Come on...Girl~

Man Up!
 
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