Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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It's always the WOMAN who does the dumping

luckster

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evansblue said:
Throughout high school, college, work friends, etc. I can't name ONE SINGLE exception where the attractive girl was dumped. I mean, it's almost unheard of. I'd say 90% of guys on this forum are here because their girl bailed.

This just goes to show you that guys are way more clingy than girls and get way to complacent in their dating lives. It's a startling statistic.
I wouldn't say it's cause of being clingy, but more so because most of the "90% of guys" are the "loyal" type where as the women they are dating might not be. In no way am I saying those guys should be disloyal, but the nature of how the gender structure is laid out makes the statistics that way.

Girls get approached through no virtues of their own, but just by being girls, thus have more opportunities to find someone better and dump.
Guys have to approach to find someone better and dump. But then approaching would look sleazy/suspicious.

In other words, if a guy sits and waits, it's rare something better will drop on his lap. If a girl sits and waits, chances are something better will drop on her lap... no pun intended.

But that's the point of the path to being a DJ, right? You don't sit and wait.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DonGorgon

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luckster said:
I wouldn't say it's cause of being clingy, but more so because most of the "90% of guys" are the "loyal" type where as the women they are dating might not be. In no way am I saying those guys should be disloyal, but the nature of how the gender structure is laid out makes the statistics that way.

Girls get approached through no virtues of their own, but just by being girls, thus have more opportunities to find someone better and dump.
Guys have to approach to find someone better and dump. But then approaching would look sleazy/suspicious.

In other words, if a guy sits and waits, it's rare something better will drop on his lap. If a girl sits and waits, chances are something better will drop on her lap... no pun intended.

But that's the point of the path to being a DJ, right? You don't sit and wait.

^^^this post is sooo real.. and great.. but what is sad about it is that cheating is a part of the normal dynamic of every relationship and yes the male must be always actively looking for his next 2 options.. while the female is being pursued by her next to options.
 

zekko

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luckster said:
I wouldn't say it's cause of being clingy, but more so because most of the "90% of guys" are the "loyal" type where as the women they are dating might not be. In no way am I saying those guys should be disloyal, but the nature of how the gender structure is laid out makes the statistics that way.
This makes me wonder if men's tendency to be more loyal is related to their gender role of being the protector? Since men are programmed to "protect", maybe that makes them less likely to dump (and thus hurt) thier mate.

Another thing is the OP was talking about high school and college age couples. This is the time when the female's value is at its highest (looks) and the male's is at its lowest (not firmly established in career, hasn't reached physical strength peak yet, has not had enough experiences to be fully confident and mature).

So this imbalance probably contributes, although older women are more likely to initiate divorce, too. I wonder if the percentage of women dumping goes down as they get older, and if it decreases in cases where there is no marriage? I wouldn't be at all surprised if that was the case.
 

bigneil

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If you are getting dumped more than you are dumping, then you need to make improvements in yourself, or date women with fewer options.

In my last 15 relationships, I dumped them 8 times, they dumped me 5 times, and 2 other times were mutual.
 
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“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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ositosucio

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st_99 said:
Its true that hot girls do not get dumped. Those are just the facts of life.

Its like a girl wanting so bad to be able to kick the crap out of a guy, its never
going to happen, they just need to accept that.

i have dumped three hot girls just in the past year. One 19, another 20 and another 26. I am 33 and married.

All of them went ape **** and hounded me with a question for weeks after WHYWHYWHYYYYYY
You have no idea how something like that plays with their minds. Because is rarely happens.

Their hamster starts spinning that wheel so fast it drives them nuts.
 

Iceberg

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ositosucio said:
i have dumped three hot girls just in the past year. One 19, another 20 and another 26. I am 33 and married.

All of them went ape **** and hounded me with a question for weeks after WHYWHYWHYYYYYY
You have no idea how something like that plays with their minds. Because is rarely happens.

Their hamster starts spinning that wheel so fast it drives them nuts.

Yeah. I also disagree with the other guy's point. Hot girls definitely get dumped. Just because a girl is hot doesn't mean you're not going to dump her. I mean, after you've had sex with her dozens of times, what's left? You're certainly not going to tolerate BPD behavior, moodiness, stupidity, etc just to bang a girl the 101st time. It's like, "Okay, I had my fun. This is getting annoying now. Time to go."

Obviously they have more men available as rebound options. But they'll still be thinking about the guy who dumped them.
 

Jariel

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I dump about 50% of the girls I date. This morning I finished things with a stripper I'd been seeing because she was getting too clingy.

But my problem is that whenever I'm really into a girl, she dumps me. Must be some unconscious vibe I'm putting out there.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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