i was cleaning up my place, and i have this shoe box with memories. not just my ex but girl friends that i was fond of, and of other girls i dated, and girls that wrote me love letters,notes,cards, etc. they date back all the way to high school. I'm out of college right now. I wasn't sure if it's good to keep them for memories, or burn them, literally (don't want the wrong things in the trash). I'm guessing most of you guys would say burn them, but i'm thinking of future things, like wouldn't be nice to have memories of the past. isn't that what life is?
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
items from the past...
- Thread starter Jamesdl
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Well if the things are signs of your AFC past burn then and never look back. I never look back on who I was pre-DJ except to realize the incredible person I am now.
If they are good things that remind you of successess i suppose keep them.
I voted no though.
If they are good things that remind you of successess i suppose keep them.
I voted no though.
TyTe`EyEs
Master Don Juan
I voted yes, but then I read your post.
Burn 'em.
Burn 'em.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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All that stuff is a part of my past, and it will never leave me. Every once in a while I'll go through it all, laugh at the cheezy notes that I was given, look at the pics, etc. It all just reminds me of how successful I was.
I have an ex who I was with for a period of 3 years. There were lots and lots of pictures of me and her. I ended up trashing most of them, but kept a few selected pictures. Most of my memories of my time with her have faded, but she'll be part of my past forever. I can't deny that.
I have an ex who I was with for a period of 3 years. There were lots and lots of pictures of me and her. I ended up trashing most of them, but kept a few selected pictures. Most of my memories of my time with her have faded, but she'll be part of my past forever. I can't deny that.
CableLight
Master Don Juan
I used to do that - saving notes/valentines/etc. Then a girlfriend of mine found 'em and it was a little, how should I say this, odd?
It wasn't embarassing, really, just kinda awkward and I could tell she thought I was still hung up on my previous girlfriends (which I wasn't, it was purely for momento's sake).
After that, I had a thought: I don't need pieces of paper to remember someone. I didn't burn them, but they're gone.
It wasn't embarassing, really, just kinda awkward and I could tell she thought I was still hung up on my previous girlfriends (which I wasn't, it was purely for momento's sake).
After that, I had a thought: I don't need pieces of paper to remember someone. I didn't burn them, but they're gone.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
diablo
Master Don Juan
Keep them. It's not like by having them you're in a state of perpetual one-itis. I've got a box of stuff with sentimental value from my childhood on up to the current day in my closet - when I'm old and decrepit I plan on bringing it down and taking a look at what things throughout my life have meant enough to me to want to save. As for the people who advocate burning the box, that's childish - anyone who hates the past without good cause is a fool.
California Love
Master Don Juan
When you become an old man, you can look back upon them and smile 
.
.I'm more sentimental than some. I'd keep them, they are yours and they are nice memories. Burning them wont do anything to make you more successful with women, or any happier.
Besides, in 20 years you will find them in your attic and have a nice little moment remembering all the tail you used to have the functional plumbing to nail
Besides, in 20 years you will find them in your attic and have a nice little moment remembering all the tail you used to have the functional plumbing to nail
naoi deag se deag
Senior Don Juan
Dude, tell one of your friends and he can make an awesome opener out of this. Keep them just for that.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.