"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Is this worth doing?

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Gdupm6

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Dated this girl for about 8 months, she didn't want to be exclusive, i caught her in a few lies... anyways, long story short we used to see each other work a few times throughout the week until i stopped working there and got another job.

She would text me saying she would miss me , and that shes still not ever me etc.. I tried setting a few dates up for us to go out but it just never went through, she says shes too busy with school and no one is really able to keep up with her "busy lifestyle"...

Last week she sent me a text saying that she thinks she failed an exam, and i replied why she feels that way, and since then I have not gotten a response and haven't texted her back.. IMO i don't think she will be texting me.


Anyways, her b day is coming up oct 25 and i was just thinking ahead and wondering if it is worth sending her a happy birthday text or is that too wimpy to do?

I don't know why I have oneitits with this girl....
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I

Iceberg

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It's not wimpy.

If your goal is to bang her, then sure, use her b-day to keep the lines of communication moving.

If your goal is to have a relationship, then I'd say she's way too flaky and to just let communication die.
 
T

tafakna

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Gdupm6 said:
She would text me saying she would miss me , and that shes still not ever me etc.. I tried setting a few dates up for us to go out but it just never went through, she says shes too busy with school and no one is really able to keep up with her "busy lifestyle"...

Last week she sent me a text saying that she thinks she failed an exam, and i replied why she feels that way, and since then I have not gotten a response and haven't texted her back.. IMO i don't think she will be texting me.
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From time to time she contacts you to figure out if 'you're still on hold', and you promptly let her know that you're still available whenever she wants. As simple as that.

Or do you honestly think that a failed exam was any sort of reason to text you?

Ignore a few texts/contacts, ignore her birthday, then after weeks send her a casual message. Let her know your time and willingness is limited... be unpredictable, disappear for weeks, make and break dates... shake her confidence...
 
G

Gdupm6

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Well if i went into depth about whey she texted me about her exam you would know.. I just tried to make it short and easier for you guys to read.

I'm a licensed nurse and shes almost graduating her nursing school, and before when we would be much closer, dating seriously etc.. we had a lot to talk about especially regarding school, tests, different subjects, etc.. thats the reason why she texted me about her exam.

I've had sex with her many times, but the thing is throughout our relationship ive been going to extra mile every time, i always would initiate things.


So i mean after the few times that i tried setting up a few dates for us to go out hang out after us not seeing each other for a while, she just kept telling me she couldnt, shes busy etc.. So i mean how much can i keep trying?
 
T

tafakna

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Gdupm6 said:
So i mean after the few times that i tried setting up a few dates for us to go out hang out after us not seeing each other for a while, she just kept telling me she couldnt, shes busy etc.. So i mean how much can i keep trying?
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Like Richard Feynman would say: "You must not fool yourself, and remember you are the easiest person to fool."

The 'depth of the text' is not nearly as important as the fact that she didn't text you back.

You're missing the whole point: the point is that you shouldn't be trying at all.

Your attitude screams 'backup guy' who will always be there when tough times arrive. That's the recipe for friendship not for a romantic relationship.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Gdupm6

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I completely agree, and this is why i have backed off, i haven't texted her at all, its been over a week, and since weve known each other, this has been the longest weve gone without seeing/talking to each other..
 
G

Gdupm6

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I know i posted this a while ago, but im just bumping to get a few more responses regarding my original post. THanks again guys
 
G

Gdupm6

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nothing new... We both have not contacted or seen each other since the original post.
 
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