"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Is this girl worth my time?

B-Real

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I met a girl bout 7 months ago. We tried to date in the beginning and it went South, but we never stopped talking. Well fast forward to the present:

I just got off the phone and asked her if she wanted to try things again and be like we were 7 months ago. She told me that she can't right cause she has too much stuff on her mind to worry about being somebody's "girlfriend" that it makes her feel like a piece of property.

She said she still loves me and that I am the only guy that she has any romantical interest in but at this point in her life she just can't. So she tells me that she can't stop talking to me. We always talked on the phone cause we live in different cities.

I don't really wanna keep talking to her all the time cause I feel like I'm her little boy toy on a string that she can do what she wants to when she wants to with. I'm thinking about showing her what she's missing. Is that a good idea? I mean should I move on and quit trying with this girl?

I care a lot for this girl and I want to make things work but obviously if she doesn't want to then there's nothing I can do. The fact that she still wants to talk to me everyday makes me think she can have her cake and eat it too, and we all know that can't happen.

So I guess I'm asking should I still talk to her all the time and maybe eventually get back together with her? She told me she doesn't know when she's ready and it could be tomorrow but its just not right now.

Or should I break contact and risk the whole thing? I like this idea cause I think it'll stick better but I don't know if I should risk losing this girl.

Thanks in advance
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Sin Verdad

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So you think one days she's really going to be like "Ok, I'm ready to date you now!". No way. She is keeping you around as a safety. When she says she doesn't want a relationship, she means with you. Time to cut off contact man.
 

B-Real

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Gosh as much as I try to think your wrong, I realize thats what I'm gonna have to do. She has a lot of guy friends that she talks to a lot. When I call her out on them she tells me time and time again that they're just friends, and that she doesn't tell them the things that she tells me.

And when you say I gotta cut my contact I really do think thats what I'm gonna have to do. It's just that a part of me wants to put up with it until I can find another girl to replace her.

I mean is that an option? Could I go along and talk to her everyday and just be empathetic about it? I feel like thats meeting this thing in the middle. I don't know. A part of me wants to just erase her number and make her realize that I have other girls and a life. But the main thing is, only the latter is true. I don't have other girls yet. I have a life, but no girls.

The semester is about to start up here in a few weeks and there will be some good opportunity there. But what sucks is I'm bout to go back to my hometown (where she is) and spend the next 3 weeks. How should I handle that? Gosh I'm sorry I'm just all confused
 

Igetit!

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You want to know if this girl is worth your time,right? Well really,it depends.
If you want to be just friends with her,then sure.She is worth your time. However,if you want to date her,this is a TOTAL waste of your time. In my opinion,she's treating you like a spare tire. You don't actually use a spare tire,you just keep it around just in case. Sin Verdad is 100% on the dot correct. He said it perfectly. It looks to me like you are just another one of her many guy friends.
I've seen this exact scenario a thousand times before. It's like a movie that I've already seen before. It's predictable. In fact, I'm so sure, I'm so positive that I already now what is going to happen, I'll go ahead and tell you.
If nothing doesn't change,and you keep calling her,and she keeps on keeping you in this "I want you/I don't want you" in the middle thing,what is going to happen is that one day you are going to call her or she is going to call you and she is going to tell you about some guy who she just met.And you are going to be angry and confused.Angry,because you are going to feel led on,and confused because she said she didn't want a boyfriend right now.
Mark my words.I PROMISE you,this is exactly what is going to happen.
 

Bloke

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If you ain't getting what you want out of the relationship, then move on. Unless you want to be actual friends.

It's that simple.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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