"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Is this BPD or normal?

Ease

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Thriller said:
To be honest, it seems it is the opposite. The more I take care of her the better she behaves, but if I "neglect" her in any way she will tend to be more upset. Yes, it is the opposite of what we have learn as PUAs.
But man it sounds like she's punishing you for not giving her what she wants. You might not see it but you sound very 'trained' indeed.

So what if you neglect her? Shes your girlfriend not your daughter, your there for a romantic relationship not to take care of her. IMO the reasonable thing to do when you get neglected is to be sad, not throw a fit and act unreasonable. Thats not right.

And when she acts unreasonable do you ever put your foot down and say NO? Does she always get her way when she throws a fit? A girl doesnt want someone who she can manipulate and get her way with, they want a strong leader that they respect, remember? Crazy but sometimes you really do need to stand up and say no to show that you are the man.

This situation reminds me a lot of my ex. She was very manipulative but i didnt see it at the time, i just fell for her games. Your woman sounds like shes used to getting her way, or has serious emotional issues. Either way do you think its right for you to feel like your walking on eggshells around your girlfriend, scared that she might throw a tantrum?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Thriller

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I agree in that everything she complains about she should feel sad like we all do instead of angry.

I am not sure how one says NO. Whenever she gets angry it just mean that for a few minutes or for a few days the situation is tense, she is angry and i am like "oh not again". In the end she doesn't get what she wants, it is just an awkward, useless period of time. I don't give in, that's why these periods of time last more than a few minutes, because I don't just say sorry and carry on with it (that's another complain of hers, why do I always have to be right).

So I don't think she gets her way, she just gets annoyed and wastes a precious time in our relationship.
 

horaholic

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The girl; I dated that acted like yours used to tell me straight up, that when she threw her little tantrums, to stand my ground, ignore her demands, and tell her to talk to me when she feels like acting like a grown-up. This came from the very mouth of the woman who was doing it!

She is one of the few females I can actually get good advice about females from. She knows the games she plays, even thought she doesnt realize she's doing it at the time. Before I found this site, she told me about what we call shyt-tests here, and about being a man, and in charge, and a leader at all times. I now know that she spoke the truth.
 

Thriller

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Ease said:
But man it sounds like she's punishing you for not giving her what she wants. You might not see it but you sound very 'trained' indeed.
I still don't understand completely what you mean by trained. Is it that by getting angry since the beginning she has managed to make me behave as she wants and now she gets angry less often because I am better "trained" than before?
 
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