"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Is This A Test Or Some Other Bull****

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trverb

Don Juan
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I went on a date with this girl that I have known for a while. This girl has been showing alot of IOI and verbally told me shes interested in me.
Everything was going great. ****y, funny flirting working its charm(or mine). Anyway in the middle of the flirting she decides to get all serious. The other week a friend of mine cheated (kissed) on his girlfriend and the girl Im dating witnessed this so did I funnily enough. She wasn't too happy he did this on his girlfriend.

She then asked me hypothetically (always is isn't it) "what if my friend broke up with his girlfriend and my other friend started to date her what would I think about this"....I told her honestly that I couldn't go out with a girl if her previous boyfriend was always around. That I need 100% percent of her attention and knowing their history together I could never be sure.

She then asked would I think the girl was "damaged goods"(the key word here) because of this.

She then told me she really hates that phrase and that shes been hearing it alot lately....

Now I know that this girl broke up with her boyfriend few months back and is just starting to get back into dating so it isnt too much of a stretch to think she is talking about herself in some way.

Im just wondering is this a test of me or is she just venting?
Any Ideas?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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thedeparted

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Kino, and switch topics. You are losing the frame if you let her go on like this. You got to get her back to a topic that has her feeling good. Otherwise she'll associate you with the bad feelings she's discussing.
 
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trverb

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mmm that crossed my mind so I started talking about a video of animals I saw on youtube(smiles all around). I seem to have gotten my answer that it was a test. I basically let her know that slut behavior doesnt gel with me in a very vague way also held her hands checking out her rings. I think this girl is afraid of guys at the moment and shes just over testing to make sure Im not an *******....
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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trverb

Don Juan
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Kino, and switch topics. You are losing the frame if you let her go on like this. You got to get her back to a topic that has her feeling good. Otherwise she'll associate you with the bad feelings she's discussing.
Click to expand...
I just had a brain wave...wouldn't kino be bad right then by maybe "anchoring" this topic to my touch(sorry crazy thought)
 
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