Is There Hope For My Life? (No Girls Involved)

[diplomatic_lies]

Quit college, get a full-time job, save up for a year (dont eat anything except rice, soya sauce, vegetables, and very irregularly some meat), and go back to college.

And yeah, books by Tony Robbins (otherwise known as Anthony Robbins) are great, they really change your mindset on life. You wont get rich reading it, but at least you'll be able to understand your position and improve it.

 

[Zircon]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
zircon is your impotence a permanent condition - is ther no cure?

Did you damage organs?

What did you expect your girl of two weeks to do? Stay with you? It's not like she is your wife and owes you anything. What would you have done if a girl's vagina was closed and damaged and you only been with her for 2 weeks?

No I'm fine now. It just took about 4 years to heal properly, in which time I have taken the proper precautions not to damage again. Now, all I really want is to beat this thing, and the way to do that is to do as well as humanly possible as a cyclist. It's more important to me now than anything else in my life.

Now regarding this chick. I told her about the problem. She didn't have much to say, she was just pretty stunned I think. I think she wasn't up to it - couldn't handle the responibility. The fact of the matter was that I was ok then (physically), but still had the psychological issues to deal with (still have). I felt insecure, and I didn't want it to go any further because I suppose, a fear of failure.

So I told her. She didn't contact me anymore. When I spoke to her she was stand-offish and cool, and was clearly not interested.

So simply, I took a chance which I had to. I knew the risks (I knew this might happen), but I still wonder how inhuman that was of her to react on such a cold way. I don't think you will ever undertand nor feel the rejection that I felt at that moment in time, and it is something that I am unfortunately still carrying with me.

You see, in the end it wasn't that much about her, but how she dealt with it. If she had dealt with it in a mature manner I would be in a much more positive state of mind regarding sexual matters. There are some things in life we can't control, we just manage the risks. Maybe I took too big a risk (she was a really HB - most of my friends rate her at least 9.5), which I have to take responsibility for. I'm not trying to escape that fact. But I'm making the fact clear that there are some of us here (such as diplomatic_lies) who have a pretty rough ride ahead of them.

So stop judging ppl. You might think we're all the same but we're not. You might think the pitch is level, but randomness makes it pretty bumpy. If you end up on a bumpy patch, you have to make the best of it, and never stop fighting.

One thing I know, is that is building enormous chracter and depth within myself, which I believe ppl do not get when life is too easy.

 

[Zircon]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
zircon is your impotence a permanent condition - is ther no cure?

Did you damage organs?

What did you expect your girl of two weeks to do? Stay with you? It's not like she is your wife and owes you anything. What would you have done if a girl's vagina was closed and damaged and you only been with her for 2 weeks?

Very simple. I wouldn't have walked away from her. What would you have done prl?

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Zircon, I'm not judging your character or your worth as a human being. I do empathize with your situation and your loss, but to reveal this to a girl you knew for only 2 weeks is quite a shock to her. I don't know how she reacted, obviously not very kindly. Maybe she thought your condition was permanent and was never to be resolved. Anyway women leave their husbands of 15 years, over erectile dysfunction, let alone a stanger of two weeks.

BTW, 'Diplomatic Lies is a tranvestite - had a sex change.

 

[Zircon]

Yo PRL,

I understand you are not judging my character. I know as well in one sense what I did was a big mistake. However, ath the time, it was necessary. This girl is no stranger to me either. I've known her for about 8 years, happened to have a one-itis crush on her etc.

Now being in the know of my then psychological condition, yeah, that was tough, and to be honest I wanted out. We were together for about 2 weeks, naky panky etc, but I wouldn't let it go any further because I was scared. Yeah I was scared, nothing to be ashamed of. So I decided the best thing was to be honest with her, and tell her as it is.

I still believe through that I found out her true character. You can say what you like PRL, but a woman that reacts in such a way is not worth having around at all, and that's pretty much the conclusion that I came to. I know that in a couple of years we will see each other again, and maybe she will feel something. But from my perspective, what she did was weak and unforgivable. As I said, if she were in that situation, no, I would not have done that, because I believe that people are first people, and secondly they are sexual beings, and not the other way around.

So coming back to the problem, how should I have reacted PRL? Should I just have tried to have sex with her, and let HER find out that way? Should I have tried to hide it from her for 2-3 months, until she gets frustrated and leaves me? Should I have just run away from an attemted relationship? My point is PRL, Ihad VERY FEW options. And none of them were good. In reality I am grateful for what I did. Even though when I think about it sometimes I struggle to understand it, and it unfortunately sometimes sways my belief in human kindness and goodwill.

But either way, I will fight this to the end. And I will use it as a fuel through anger when it is required. Guess what...I'm going to make it. And in full view of that hoe who has no self-belief nor character.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

You did the right thing by telling her right away, I would have done the same. But the response you received should have not come to a shock to you, considering that it was turning into a 'sexual' situation and you were doing a little 'hanky panky' after only two weeks.

These women that are on men's jocks right away are looking for sex, period - so don't expect much from hors that react in such a manner. Hors are not loving, cherishing, and loyal creatures, they are in it for their own sexual gratificatiion and not to show concern for their male partners. No surprise here on your girl's callousness, on the contrary, it is to be expected! Her knowing you for 8 years prior, she should have handled the situation more delicately and with more compassion, I agree.


What happen to Stuartsan who started this thread - whats up bro, waiting for your response.

 

[DJnomore]

Work two jobs

Sounds rough I know.
But almost everyone in your position had to do it.
If your parents have the money to put you through school that is good. If not you need to do it yourself. Read library books if you can get them or borrow your friends text books.

The key in life is making more than you consume. If you can do that you win. If not you lose. For many people the key is to work harder than others. Working smarter is where the money is but till then you need the money to be able to take oppertunities when they come so you work harder.

Sustain yourself with the idea that you are working to be ahead of others not just to catch up. That is important cause it makes you able to do more cause you are doing it to win.

 

[The Iron Chef]

Stuart, it's sad to see a mod of Sosuave going through something like this. In this this situation you're going to have to get REAL creative. When people hit rock bottom, most of them can't crawl their way out, but for those that do (due to some ingenuity forced on by their desperate situation), they eventually end up more successful than their wilddest dreams. I don't know exactly what your situation is, so take a close look at ALL options available to you. Don't discount anything because it's silly or implausible.

 

[jakethasnake]

Stuartsan,

I wish I could offer you better words of support, but please - DON'T EVER GIVE UP! I believe in you, the underdog. Fight, even when you feel that you don't have any fight left in you. I'm praying for you man.


And PRL, are you serious about Diplomatic_Lies? Dayum.

 

[Zircon]

PRL,

Yep you put things into perspective for me, thanks. It is true though that for a while I was a person who believed that there is a certain limit to what you can do to people. Based on my charcter, I would not be capable of doing that to someone.

Now, the real deal is, do I really want someone like that in my life? It's a difficult question at the best of times. I was at the lowest point of my life, and I simply did NOT expect her to act in that way.

This in no way reflects the reality of the situation. This is the way it is, and all I'm trying to do, is for it NOT to affect future relations. It may sound simple, but it is fvcking hard now to look at some women and expect the same from them. It really is confusing, because of the fact that I did not expect it, and now I feel I have to go out there and do it all over again, believe that it won't happen, and at the back of my mind...yeah it's not easy at all.

Anyway, one last thing to whoever started this thread: you will have something to "brag" about when you're made it. You will be able to say you worked yourself up from ground zero to where u r going to be, and no-one can ever take it away from you.

I on the other hand will keep this with me till I die. It's not as if I can tell someone, I had ED, and I made it. You see, if you make it Lost (or whoever you are), it's yours to keep. Just keep that in mind. It's more than you will ever get from anyone else in your life.

Laterz