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Is there any truth to the phrase “out of your league”?

mrgoodstuff

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Yes there is "out of your league. Some very attractive women have no interest in dating anyone who isn't wealthy and willing to spend a ton of money on them.

No loss.
Oh they'll have guys their sexually attracted within their tax bracket that they'll fvck while the rich guys simp out.
 

Roober

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Yes and no...

She will be out of your league if you are not the best version of yourself. If you have maximized your mind, body, wealth, and status, leagues don't exist.
 

Visionist

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I was looking at the young Italian architect couple killed in the Grenfell Tower fire, and the girl was very pretty, an 8.5 or even a 9 to some people. Her dude was slim and normal looking, no exceptionally handsome hunk. I doubt he had money either, since they moved to London together in order to be able earn a normal living.

Interesting.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I was looking at the young Italian architect couple killed in the Grenfell Tower fire, and the girl was very pretty, an 8.5 or even a 9 to some people. Her dude was slim and normal looking, no exceptionally handsome hunk. I doubt he had money either, since they moved to London together in order to be able earn a normal living.

Interesting.
It's like that alot of times.
 

biggoal

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I was looking at the young Italian architect couple killed in the Grenfell Tower fire, and the girl was very pretty, an 8.5 or even a 9 to some people. Her dude was slim and normal looking, no exceptionally handsome hunk. I doubt he had money either, since they moved to London together in order to be able earn a normal living.

Interesting.
Things are a lot different in Europe.
 

Visionist

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Yeah, they're a lot worse, lol.
 

Soldier King

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I thought you already answered your own question because you have the key word to.

Yes in society there are leagues. Based on money looks social status etc. So does that mean you shouldn't approach a highly successful attractive woman because you don't have much money now or very overweight or something else holding you back, ABSOLUTELY NOT, because there is one huge factor that can't be quantified, the word you said POTENTIAL. Will a woman bet on you based on your potential? That's up to her, don't decide for her, just approach and give your all.

Now that being said, you can't always be a man of potential, there comes a time when you can't just promise what you will be, but have to actually change your life and the faster you do, the closer you are to your love :p.

Now I've left out the most crucial part for last. Even if you have no potential and never planning on changing or you simply can't, you can still offer one more thing that can make you stand out and that is, love and devotion :). Now she is gonna be given a ton of attention if she's high value so it will definitely be hard to stand out in this department, but if you have enough you can still stand out by showing her you are truly dedicated.
 

Lynx nkaf

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It is most-true when you believe it to be true because it manifests itself is your energy, communication and sub communication. Women sense it keenly.

You must grow as a person until you find out what your real SMV potential is. ONLY then will you truly know and be able to have the vibe, attitude and entitlement that comes with it.
what if you keep growing and growing, never a break, when would you know you're done?
 

Lynx nkaf

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As true as it may be, and indeed I agree it exists especially in cases of extreme difference in value, I think that the idea of a "league" can be a very counterproductive thing to focus on, at least as a beginner.

Obviously I don't say that a 300lbs loser should think he deserves the high school hottie cheerleader with 0 effort, but barely any men that get into this self-improvement arena fall into this category. Most of them I have seen, including me when I started, suffer from the usual mix of nice guy attributes/low self-esteem etc
Brainwashing oneself with some extra entitlement can only help to get out of this pit. Even if you don't get the 10 that might be "out of your league", your confidence boost is gonna make you more attractive to others.
Dwelling on issues of height, race, money and all that sh!t is not gonna help much.

Thinking about these issues from a place of abundance is perfectly fine. But most people that waste energy on these topics are far from it I believe.
yes you're probably right, gave me confidence that I don't need to make a 'before' record of where I began. Just continue improving. One day, I'll probably realise I'm at the 'after' picture level.
 

Lynx nkaf

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Some women are certainly out of my league but it works both wayes - I don't want to have anything in common with 90% of women. I'd pay for that part of female society to leave me alone forever if I would have to.

League is pretty much 1.5 SMV point derivation in +/-. It's the "we can talk" spread.

Any communication that goes beyound that threshold is official/work related.

For ONS she might sleep with low status good looks guy if in so-so mental shape.

MONEY and GOOD JOB and PROSPECT TO BE SUCCESSFUL is a big YES sign for a female for an LTR but it doesn't mean that you will get your c.ock polished often. It just means that she might be companion (and still withold sex from you if your (L)ooks s.ucks).

That's how this world rolls. Accept it.
So I do a drivethrough of a nicer neighbourhood I fantasize about living in(leave doors unlocked and bicycle out overnight on driveway kind of neighbourhood.)
As I'm driving in to the neighbourhood entrance street I notice a man in a hot tub with some friends.

He's got that 'Dad bod' look but I can tell he used to be ripped by the still visible cut lines of muscles on his upper chest.

And sure, I got disappointed.

Its like, oh no, there's another athlete that let himself go.

I get it.

Now I bet if I had seen him doing something where he's sweating his ass off cutting up a tree or some heavy landscaping in his yard and yes, same Dad bod but hey, look at this, he's getting back in shape, well, alright! now we're talking!
I may have felt a spark of attraction and admiration for him since he's trying.

As it was, Dad bod in the hot tub looked bloated and pasty and it saddened me.

More than it should have for just driving by a stranger, lol.

There might be people looking at me that way....I realised....to take accountability.....but the dynamic will change the harder I try to improve.


I think I get the Law of Attraction now.
 

Dash Riprock

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I’ve never paid much attention to the notion of “leagues”, but I’ve recently reconnected with a woman who is now a doctor, is stunning, and draws in some pretty high status, attractive men and women into her life. And this is one of the few times I’ve felt that a woman is objectively out of my league.

Is there much truth to the phrase “out of your league”? Or is it just a phrase people use to drag others down, and something people tell themselves that limits their potential?
Or punching above your weight class or out-kicking your coverage...but the bottom line is YES.

Men (like women) can be, and usually are, notorious for having unrealistic expectations. Fat dumpy guys with little or no money thinking they should be dating a supermodel and getting all p*issed off when she has zero interest.

Ask yourself an honest question: What do you have to bring to the (dating/relationship) table and what advantages do you have over other guys? Unacceptable answers are I'm loyal, a good listener, stable. Bzzzzzt. Wrong! All the boring s*hit. It might work with a HB4-5, but we're talking HB8+'s here. If you want to date a HB8+ you'd better extraordinary in a number of areas, because hot, attractive women can have their pick of the litter, so why should she choose you?

This is where guys really struggle. Most guys do literally NOTHING in the area of self-improvement; looks, physique, money, dating knowledge, etc. BUT, these are the things that can give you HUGE advantages.

Look, you're a "product" and she's the "buyer." She’s going to be evaluating all sorts of products and will find one that best meets her needs and criteria. The product that meets the most needs will get the sale. Get it? So the more advantages you can give yourself, the better your chances are for landing a hot, quality woman.

I can sum it up in a few brief phrases, but for many of you, it's going to be like drinking bleach because there seems to be a backlash against hard work these days. But here goes:

You want a male model's physique? Put in the WORK.
You want $1M in the bank in 12 months? Put in the WORK.
You want to get better with women and not get dumped so much? Put in the WORK.
You want a better career? Put in the WORK.
You want a better education? Put in the WORK.

Do you see the theme here?

Sure, some people in life are born with all sorts of advantages. That's life, Sporto. Welcome to the club. But 95% of us WORK our assess off to get what we want. No bitching, no whining, no complaining. Just nose-to-the-grindstone hard work. Google “Walter Payton best runs”—this guy epitomized hard work. I bring up Payton because he was a guy who was 5'10/205 but plowed over guys much bigger, never ran out of bounds, blocked his ass off, and gave every ounce of effort on every play for largely bad Bears teams, until his 9th-10th year in the league. He ended up as arguably the great NFL running back of all time on sheer will, effort, and desire. Not size, luck or all sorts of advantages. I have a Payton figurine in my office to remind me to "get it done" even when I don't want to. Use what works for you.

The same principles apply to moving yourself up a few "leagues" to date better women. Put in the W-O-R-K.

Good luck.

~Dash~
 
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Visionist

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It's the age old dilemma of no responsibilities VS great responsibilities.

By the time a man has put in the time, the effort and the dedication to become attractive physically, financially, socially, when the sun is finally setting on all his hurdles and sacrifices, what are women and their attentions worth to him anymore?

If I were a ripped multi millionaire with a seven figure income and celebrity friends, with never a dull moment in my thrilling, action packed lifestyle, I honest to Hell wouldn't give a shìt about any women. They would all be so far beneath me that they might as well be insects.

I wouldn't have time for women, or time to even think about them. How could I?

Sex is only ever a big deal if you aren't getting any.
 
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