"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Is there a point where it's too late to make things sexual?

Sevinup

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So, there's this girl I'm trying to get with (Let's call her HB1), but I'm not 100% sure it's going to work out. She also has a friend (HB2) I'd like to get with, but it wouldn't be possible to get with both of them, or at least during the same time period.

I've hung out with HB2 several times, but I haven't tried anything with her, because I'd rather get with her hotter friend (HB1) first. I've done some flirting, some kino, etc, but it could easily be interpreted as a just friends relationship. I haven't made myself seem too interested, but I'm sure she's thought about it as a possibility. She's thrown a few IOIs my way, but like I said I'm reluctant to act on it just yet.

My question is this: is there ever a point where if you don't make a move, it probably won't happen? Like if I blow her off too much and she loses what interest she might have, is it hopeless or would a bit of seducing bring it back? I've been hanging out with HB2 instead because HB1 has been out of town. Should I just stop seeing HB2 until I see how it's gonna work out, or does it really matter?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Chamber36

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Well I'm no pro, but usually if you pass the point where you thought you should have made a move, and the girl is still interested, you got yourself a girl with guaranteed high IL. Just make those girls wait as long as they are willing to.
 

Mike32ct

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When a chick is interested in you, it is usually a limited time offer. However, we have no evidence to suggest that it's too late yet. You might still have a chance with HB2. I would make a move on her because she is the one more interested in YOU. Plus you can make her hotter friend jealous.
 

DonJuanit0

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yes
 
R

Rubato

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Yes. There are few unlimited opportunities in life and even fewer with women. As Mike said, interest is always a limited time offer. If interest is high initially, you may have more room to screw up and may get a second chance.

However

If you're starting to worry about whether you've waited too long to escalate, you probably have. There is only one remedy for this... attempt escalation and find out whether you actually did wait too long.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Zerro

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Mike32ct said:
When a chick is interested in you, it is usually a limited time offer.
This is true, but it's not always a one-time offer. If it is then she wasn't that interested to begin with. A girl can have cyclical interest where it starts out strong, wanes when you waited to long, then comes back again weeks or months later but this assumes that a) you run into her frequently and b) you've avoided being too friendly and stayed out of the friendzone.
 

ArcBound

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Zerro said:
This is true, but it's not always a one-time offer. If it is then she wasn't that interested to begin with. A girl can have cyclical interest where it starts out strong, wanes when you waited to long, then comes back again weeks or months later but this assumes that a) you run into her frequently and b) you've avoided being too friendly and stayed out of the friendzone.
I agree with this except with part a).

I hit it off with a girl pretty good 2 years ago and I messaged her and she was down to hang out. This is after not speaking for 2 years...
 

FairShake

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Ok, what is wrong with the AFC youth of today? You guys seem to be completely unaware of the easiest way to seal the deal (or last year's deal) in the world.

It's called liquor. It works.
 

PapiChulo

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No time limit for high value men that are always in demand. The only reason it's a limited time offer for the average dudes is the amount of options women have. While you are late, the other guy comes and smittens the woman and you become old news (boring). If two people have sexual chemistry there is no time limit in my humble opinion. Than, in most cases the temporary interest is pretty much synonymous with low interest.... go figure. One more thing, you can make anything sexual if you are subtle and ambiguous about it.
 

Zerro

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ArcBound said:
I agree with this except with part a).

I hit it off with a girl pretty good 2 years ago and I messaged her and she was down to hang out. This is after not speaking for 2 years...
Every case is different but yeah, part b) is most critical.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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bigneil

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There absolutely is a point where it's too late. It's the instant where they know they laid it out there for you but you didn't take it (out of fear of rejection). You managed to trick her until that point into thinking you were too confident to care what her response was. Now she suddenly sees that she is superior in your eyes.

He who hesitates is lost. Venus favors the bold.

Remember: her feelings for you are in a constant state of flux. They are either getting more intense or less intense, never staying constant. Therefore there must be a peak interest point. You must make a move before then.
 
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