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Is she shy or not into me

Claudio1975

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So, I’ve been out with a woman I met on OLD and she is honestly one of the more attractive women I’ve been with. Her photo actually did not do her justice.

We’ve met twice and we talk, but she won’t give me her number and she seems guarded. I touched her on the elbow but when I was about to give her a hug she was already turned away. My first thought was, she isn’t into me. Ok, that’s cool, but someone else I know says maybe she is just very conservative. Right, sure but for the right Alpha let’s see how conservative she’d be. Anyway, would it be ok to ask, “Are you shy/nervous or just not into me”? If she is then ok, and if not I am happy to move on. I’d just like to know what she is actually thinking.
 

dude99

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So, I’ve been out with a woman I met on OLD and she is honestly one of the more attractive women I’ve been with. Her photo actually did not do her justice.

We’ve met twice and we talk, but she won’t give me her number and she seems guarded. I touched her on the elbow but when I was about to give her a hug she was already turned away. My first thought was, she isn’t into me. Ok, that’s cool, but someone else I know says maybe she is just very conservative. Right, sure but for the right Alpha let’s see how conservative she’d be. Anyway, would it be ok to ask, “Are you shy/nervous or just not into me”? If she is then ok, and if not I am happy to move on. I’d just like to know what she is actually thinking.
If she turned away from a hug, i wouldn't put much effort in her moving forward. A hug is nothing.
Girls will hug anyone. If she isnt even willing to hug you.....

Sad part is if you ask her she will most likely lie. Women rarely are honest with guys, they drop hints and hope guys can read their minds.

You can ask her if she is shy. Get ready to next though.
 

Snake-eyes

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The biggest indicator is her actions, based on what you're saying she might not be into you. I would stop wasting time and next her hard
 

Robert28

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What have you done on these 2 dates you’ve had? I’m trying to figure out why she keeps going out with you if she isn’t interested. You aren’t buying her dinner and stuff like that are you?
 

Frozen799

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2 dates for only a hug from OLD? Wouldnt put any much more effort into this, wouldn't even hope that she contacts me.

Dont ask this question... its pointless.
 

The Duke

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You don't generate enough tingles for her or she is using you for something other than a romantic relationship. Many times they are entertaining several other men on a surface level.

These types aren't very sexual. They get their fix by having multiple orbiters. They put up walls. They have bonding issues. Play a little push/pull with them and they respond but it always ends up being a waste of time.
 

Kotaix

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So, I’ve been out with a woman I met on OLD and she is honestly one of the more attractive women I’ve been with. Her photo actually did not do her justice.

We’ve met twice and we talk, but she won’t give me her number and she seems guarded. I touched her on the elbow but when I was about to give her a hug she was already turned away. My first thought was, she isn’t into me. Ok, that’s cool, but someone else I know says maybe she is just very conservative. Right, sure but for the right Alpha let’s see how conservative she’d be. Anyway, would it be ok to ask, “Are you shy/nervous or just not into me”? If she is then ok, and if not I am happy to move on. I’d just like to know what she is actually thinking.
She's not shy. YOU are shy and projecting yourself onto her. Don't touch her on the elbow so you might get a hug, jab her in the ribs and smile at her. Being respectful and obsessing about how she feels about you is beta. Being outgoing and not caring what she thinks is Alpha. Alpha is a mindset, not a demographic, you can be Alpha at the drop of a hat if you can let go of caring how she's going to see you.

Do not be direct with women you're interested in. Communicate with your eyes, make her want to know what you're thinking.
 

Barrister

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So, I’ve been out with a woman I met on OLD and she is honestly one of the more attractive women I’ve been with. Her photo actually did not do her justice.

We’ve met twice and we talk, but she won’t give me her number and she seems guarded. I touched her on the elbow but when I was about to give her a hug she was already turned away. My first thought was, she isn’t into me. Ok, that’s cool, but someone else I know says maybe she is just very conservative. Right, sure but for the right Alpha let’s see how conservative she’d be. Anyway, would it be ok to ask, “Are you shy/nervous or just not into me”? If she is then ok, and if not I am happy to move on. I’d just like to know what she is actually thinking.
You should be kissing her by the middle of the first date - at the end of the first date at the absolute latest. You are dangerously close to being friendzoned if you haven't already. Absolutely do not ask her if she is just not that into you. That is really weak and you will look insecure to her.

Go on the third date and start using kino immediately. Easiest way is to go to a bar and sit at the bar so your legs are touching. Go from there. Create some sexual tension. If she is ice queen the whole time it is time to move on, brother. It may be too late.
 

flowtheory

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So, I’ve been out with a woman I met on OLD and she is honestly one of the more attractive women I’ve been with. Her photo actually did not do her justice.

We’ve met twice and we talk, but she won’t give me her number and she seems guarded. I touched her on the elbow but when I was about to give her a hug she was already turned away. My first thought was, she isn’t into me. Ok, that’s cool, but someone else I know says maybe she is just very conservative. Right, sure but for the right Alpha let’s see how conservative she’d be. Anyway, would it be ok to ask, “Are you shy/nervous or just not into me”? If she is then ok, and if not I am happy to move on. I’d just like to know what she is actually thinking.
You already know the answer to your question. Look at her actions and you have your answer. A woman who is interested will definitely give you her number without being prompted. A woman who is interested will definitely place herself in the right position to be touched or kissed.

Don’t ask if she’s shy/nervous or just not in to you.

If you go for a hug in the date or a kiss and she pulls back like you have a disease, that’s a huge indicator she is not interested. You can hang out with her again if you just enjoy getting out, but I would consider this done in any romantic sense. Better to find a new woman and take this as a learning experience.
 

Mike32ct

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You already know the answer to your question. Look at her actions and you have your answer. A woman who is interested will definitely give you her number without being prompted. A woman who is interested will definitely place herself in the right position to be touched or kissed.

Don’t ask if she’s shy/nervous or just not in to you.

If you go for a hug in the date or a kiss and she pulls back like you have a disease, that’s a huge indicator she is not interested. You can hang out with her again if you just enjoy getting out, but I would consider this done in any romantic sense. Better to find a new woman and take this as a learning experience.
^^This, exactly.

At best, you are in friendzone. If she reaches out to you again and you simply want more experience hanging out with a hot chick, you could go out again. But your chances of anything romantic are very remote.
 

samspade

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I'm going to offer a counter-opinion. Give it a couple of dates.

Don't ASK her outright if she likes you, as that will sink your chances.

But some girls are just really shy and awkward. They're not good at sending signals, flirting, or showing interest in a way that makes sense to the rest of us.

Of course both could be true: She could be shy and awkward AND not interested. But if you are interested in her, I think you can extend the window a little bit as long as you don't spend too much time/money on her...plus you'll have to make a move at some point.

Caveat, if your instincts tell you she's guarded BECAUSE she's not attracted, listen to your gut then.
 

kasper

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I think she's just keeping you as an option. If I'm not wrong she might have even played some games with you like changing/cancelling plans even when she has time in her schedule or making you wait.

My advise for you is to do the opposite, don't ask her if she's into you, don't ask her if she's shy or don't even ask her out. Don't talk/think about her. For now consider her answer to be 'no' for your question "is she interest in you".

Now do what you'd do if she said no, you probably might move on (to some other better person) and it might work out well.

The answer to your question will be does she try to get in touch with you - if she does, she's interested in you. Meanwhile when you don't talk to her, she thinks that she's losing an option and does everything she has to, to keep your interest on.

If she's the type of girl I'm expecting her to be, don't expect much romance from her unless you'd like to commit to her.
 

Claudio1975

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What have you done on these 2 dates you’ve had? I’m trying to figure out why she keeps going out with you if she isn’t interested. You aren’t buying her dinner and stuff like that are you?
Beer only and we went Dutch. I don’t get it either.
 

Claudio1975

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I think she's just keeping you as an option. If I'm not wrong she might have even played some games with you like changing/cancelling plans even when she has time in her schedule or making you wait.

My advise for you is to do the opposite, don't ask her if she's into you, don't ask her if she's shy or don't even ask her out. Don't talk/think about her. For now consider her answer to be 'no' for your question "is she interest in you".

Now do what you'd do if she said no, you probably might move on (to some other better person) and it might work out well.

The answer to your question will be does she try to get in touch with you - if she does, she's interested in you. Meanwhile when you don't talk to her, she thinks that she's losing an option and does everything she has to, to keep your interest on.

If she's the type of girl I'm expecting her to be, don't expect much romance from her unless you'd like to commit to her.
We were supposed to go bowling last Wednesday and she called me (from a private number) to tell me she had forgotten socks and that we could not go bowling. She then suggested getting a drink at a nearby bar. I told her that I thought she purposely forgot the socks because she knew I’d be her in bowling. I think her changing the plan seemed odd to me.
 

samspade

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We were supposed to go bowling last Wednesday and she called me (from a private number) to tell me she had forgotten socks and that we could not go bowling. She then suggested getting a drink at a nearby bar. I told her that I thought she purposely forgot the socks because she knew I’d be her in bowling. I think her changing the plan seemed odd to me.
Okay, I missed the part where she won't give you her number. That's a little weird. How are you supposed to make plans? Maybe she has a BF. On the plus side at least she offered a counter-plan.
 

Tilex

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I don't waste time on women that won't give me their phone number.

You went on 2 dates and she still didn't give you her number? = Red Flag
You gave her a hug and she rejected you = Red Flag

Come on guy!
The signs of disinterest are clear as water.
 
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Spaz

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Claudio, if I were you, instead of chasing skirts now, I'd focus on myself/you.

1st off you need to cultivate a better look and that goes a long way in generating a better vibe.

Its unfortunate that people are being judged by their appearances but that's the only way a stranger/women has to go by when they just met you.

Spend a couple of months in a gym, hire a personal trainer (I've never recommended this but for you, you'll need it - someone to push you).

At the same time, join up for some boxing classes too, it teaches you foot work, body movements and that helps with ur poise.

Meanwhile while undertaking all these, read up the entire DJ Bible, absorb and practice it until its imbued within ur psyche.

Your life will change for the better, not just with women but in other spheres also.
 

Claudio1975

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So, I did ask the question and got a reply. All I need to say is that if Chris Hemsworth were in the picture she wouldn’t treat him like this, so f
Claudio, if I were you, instead of chasing skirts now, I'd focus on myself/you.

1st off you need to cultivate a better look and that goes a long way in generating a better vibe.

Its unfortunate that people are being judged by their appearances but that's the only way a stranger/women has to go by when they just met you.

Spend a couple of months in a gym, hire a personal trainer (I've never recommended this but for you, you'll need it - someone to push you).

At the same time, join up for some boxing classes too, it teaches you foot work, body movements and that helps with ur poise.

Meanwhile while undertaking all these, read up the entire DJ Bible, absorb and practice it until its imbued within ur psyche.

Your life will change for the better, not just with women but in other spheres also.

I go to the gym. Thanks.
 
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