"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Is my friend settling?

fanatic22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 7, 2018
Messages
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My best friend is 28, great looking guy, about to graduate from a top B school with an incredible job lined up. Basically he’s in the top 1% of the dating market and in the prime of his life. On the negative side he also feels strongly about only having sex with girlfriends and is somewhat moralistic about sex. And he tends to be fairly needy in relationships.

So, he met a 33 year old average looking Colombian woman who ADORES him and, as anyone who has dealt with Colombian women knows, they latch on to you and love bomb like there’s no tomorrow. They’ve been dating for 6 months. It’s been a LDR but they will probably end up in the same city within a few months. He’s thinking about proposing in a few months.

I love this guy to death and I can see how happy he is but I can’t help but feel like he’s settling. He’s been burned really badly in the past so he truly believes this is the only girl in the world who will treat him like this. I have no idea what to do - if I bring this up overtly I know he’d get extremely defensive. Any advice?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ohrein

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 30, 2016
Messages
1,071
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Age
41
You can try to bring it up gently but you have zero chance of influencing him. Blue pill guys that are in love will not be capable of thinking about their relationship with any level of rationality. In ten years I don't think I've ever seen or managed to talk some sense into someone in that situation. Best you can do is try to mitigate some damage and pick up the pieces later.
 
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