"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Is it too controlling giving a time constraint for when she needs to get back to u?

C

Confused

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If you give a girl a suggestion of where you're going to take her out by text and you add at the end of it 'let me know by midnight tonight as i'll need to make arrangements' so that she needs to make a decision.

would this be perceived as being too controlling and needy?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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f283000

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My question for you would be why are you asking for her suggestion on where to take her out? Girls don't want to be leaders they want a strong man to lead THEM. Asking a girl "hey you think we should go here, reply by midnight" you know how wimpy that sounds? You are basically asking for permission to take her to a certain place.

Girls love dates because of the element of fun, romance, surprise and because they get to be led to a man. When you take that away you are already giving yourself a struggle to win the game. When you take all that away it doesn't become a date it becomes hanging out with another of her girlfriends. She doesn't want a girlfriend if she agrees to go out with you she wants a man and she expects a man to set the time/place of where the meeting will take place and where it will go from there.
 
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sodbuster

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just say call by midnight so I can make other plans...make her wonder who those are with
 
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f283000

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Here is what I do which has worked for me so far. Let's say I want to take her to dinner first. I tell her to meet me like a block or 2 from the restaurant I plan to take her to. I don't tell her what we are going to do I just tell her to meet me downtown or wherever I plan to meet. We meet and I get her walking in that direction. Walking together creates bonding and gives her the feeling of being a couple with you. Plus you can use the opportunity to kino and walk with your arm across her shoulder. As you guys are talking you tell her you are starving and you know this great restaurant close to here. It will all seem spontaneous to her which is good you want her to get a feeling of you being an spontaneous guy.

It's better to have an element of surprise and fun rather than telling her everything you plan on doing and taking away that element of surprise, "hey what do you think about going to this place on saturday, then we can go have dinner at red robin, then maybe go to a movie at the theater." You know how that sounds? it sounds like a script. You should have a script for what you are going to do on a date but just don't tell her! The key is for you to know and have the places scoped out of where you plan to take her.

Never ask for their suggestions on where to go. It's your job to take her for a ride.
 
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Confused

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f283000 said:
My question for you would be why are you asking for her suggestion on where to take her out? Girls don't want to be leaders they want a strong man to lead THEM. Asking a girl "hey you think we should go here, reply by midnight" you know how wimpy that sounds? You are basically asking for permission to take her to a certain place.

Girls love dates because of the element of fun, romance, surprise and because they get to be led to a man. When you take that away you are already giving yourself a struggle to win the game. When you take all that away it doesn't become a date it becomes hanging out with another of her girlfriends. She doesn't want a girlfriend if she agrees to go out with you she wants a man and she expects a man to set the time/place of where the meeting will take place and where it will go from there.
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No no, you dont get it. I'm leading but giving her the time constraint of when to get back to me by. for instance it's like 'we'll go to this place blah blah, let me know by midnight tonight as i'll need to make arrangements.'
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Confused

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sodbuster said:
just say call by midnight so I can make other plans...make her wonder who those are with
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if the end of my text is 'let me know your decision by 12 tonight as i'll need to make arrangements.' should i change that to

'let me know your decision by 12 tonight so i can make other plans'

does that make sense?

if i were to say 'let me know your decision by 12 tonight otherwise i'll make other plans' does that sound right?

the plan is to give her 2 options to choose from without too much detail, 1 of which is a surprise.

if i say 'or i'll make other plans' it sounds as if i'm making other plans with her not with someone else..

the text has to have a time already arranged in it or it wont make sense.
 
Kailex

Kailex

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Confused said:
If you give a girl a suggestion of where you're going to take her out by text and you add at the end of it 'let me know by midnight tonight as i'll need to make arrangements' so that she needs to make a decision.

would this be perceived as being too controlling and needy?
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Yes. It is.

Everyone else has explained why. You are NOT leading by giving a time constraint. If in your mind you want to give her til midnight to get back to you, then do so, but DON'T tell her. If she gets back to you 2 days later, you just say: Sorry, I made other plans already.

And why the hell would you need to know by midnight? What in the blue hell do you need to make arrangements for? A charter jet? Your butler to pick her up? What's the point of a deadline if there's no real point to it.

Hell, you might even score yourself one of those women who will ask: WHY MIDNIGHT.

And then you'll say: To make arrangements.

And then she'll text you a: LOL
 
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