"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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IOI's and Cold Approaching

parkthebus

Master Don Juan
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So I just started reading the DJ Bible and the second post in chapter A says:

"Approach only when you get the initial eye contact. If you walk up to her without her noticing you first, you're setting yourself up for the big R. After the eye contact show her your beautiful smile - when she smiles back that's your que, have at em' Cassanova."

That seems more like someone rationalising themselves out of approaching. What if the girl hasn't seen you? What if she's shy? What if you live in a city where people tend to be reserved and often hostile? I used to live in London and got far less eye contact than I do in Australia and I haven't changed in the way I look, dress or carry myself.

I don't doubt that if, as a rule, you don't approach women who haven't given any eye contact you'll get rejected far less often but I think that advising men not to approach without eye contact is flawed.

Thoughts?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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ubercat

Master Don Juan
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I'd agree - I say harden up and do it anyway. In a big city women will often be pre-occupied or listening to music. If u wait for IOIs you might be waiting a long long.
 
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