Intelligence: attractive or "nerdy"?

[Who is John Galt?]

Is intelligence and knowledge a net plus with women or are they a net negative? I have several books not related to school on my dorm shelf. Should I keep them there to display my knowledge/intelligence and "who I am" or should I put them in an "undisclosed location" so I don't look like a "nerd"?

I have seen some women who are very attracted to intelligence, but they usually have an initial attraction based on physical and other factors. I am not certain as to what the net effect of this is among women as a whole.

 

[golf299]

don't fake being something that you're not for the sake of some girl....definitely not worth losing your identity over.

 

[DJ_Dork]

Neither. You can change subtly how your true behavior but the core remains.

 

[McKindley]

Keep the books out. If a girl doesn't want to be around you because you read for fun you don't want to be around her.

However, you'll probably never meet that girl. Most girls like it if you do things you know are good things to do for personal growth (read for fun, work out, learn an instruments, stuff like that.)

Golf299 is telling the truth. Don't pretend to be some guy you aren't. If you're old enough to be in college then you should have enough interests to where you don't need to fake them anymore.

 

[Bonhomme]

The best way to handle intelligence ...

... is to let it be. Don't try to impress a gal with displays of intelligence or try to "dumb yourself down" for the sake of accessibility, either. I observe that attraction doesn't correlate with intelligence too much one way or the other, though people generally want relationships with those who are more-or-less at their level of intelligence.

So just put your "scholarly" books wherever you put your other books. But you might want to hide any hardcore porn . That's just basic etiquette.

One other thing, though: one should do their best to speak in simple language, unless they know for sure the person their talking with has a good enough vocabulary to hang with it. Talking at the vocabulary level of your audience is just good communication, not "dumbing oneself down," whereas talking "over people's heads" does come across as being a clueless nerd.

 

[Kidd]

intelligence is good.

Stop thinking too much about what women think. Any chick who calls you a "nerd" because you are good with computers or technology is a shallow ***** and is not worth a second of your time.

 

[Cbaoth]

Your intelligence is more important than women. Don't hide it.

Did you not learn this from the book that your username is derived from ?

 

[squirrels]

"Intelligence" is an ability to understand.

"Nerdiness" is a way of life.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by squirrels
"Intelligence" is an ability to understand.

"Nerdiness" is a way of life.

Oh I like that, well put!

Galt, I agree about the books not hiding the books. Several woman who have been to my house have commented on my library. Although intelligence was implied, their main comment was that they were impressed with the variety of subjects that interested me.

Don't be afraid to be who you truly are. Temptation and society may try to dictate who you should be but the fact of the matter is whether or not YOU are comfortable with who you are. If so, why hide it?

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

Originally posted by Who is John Galt?
Is intelligence and knowledge a net plus with women or are they a net negative? I have several books not related to school on my dorm shelf. Should I keep them there to display my knowledge/intelligence and "who I am" or should I put them in an "undisclosed location" so I don't look like a "nerd"?

I have seen some women who are very attracted to intelligence, but they usually have an initial attraction based on physical and other factors. I am not certain as to what the net effect of this is among women as a whole.

if you are intellagent and get high grades, but still maintain a normal life, this is a definite plus, a nerd is negative things because like mentioned eatly, it is a way of life, if you get super high grades and just study 24/7 and never go out then this is a negative thing.

 

[Yotsuya-san]

I agree that one shouldn't hide their intelligence but neither should one flaunt it. Most likely, the average college age girls won't give your bookshelf a second glance so whether it's Shakespeare, Harry Potter, or even manga next to your schoolbooks, it probably will not make too much of an impression one way or another. Most likely, they're only gonna comment if they just happen to see something they like to read too, if indeed they do read anything besides Cosmo.

 

[biker_gixxer]

Is intelligence and knowledge a net plus with women or are they a net negative?

Intelligence is a plus with women and people in general. I've never heard a women complain about having a boyfriend or husband because he's intelligent.

 

[So Many Ways]

Originally posted by biker_gixxer
Is intelligence and knowledge a net plus with women or are they a net negative?

Intelligence is a plus with women and people in general. I've never heard a women complain about having a boyfriend or husband because he's intelligent.

It is definitely a plus. I even get social proofed by female friends because of it. "You should meet my friend so many ways. He's so smart. He went to college, he works with computers...." All the sudden you get instant status among her friends and they'll want to talk to you. Don't hide it.

 

[smoke city]

I agree with the above--with some reservations. Intelligence is definitely something that will help you...but only if she already likes you/is attracted to you. Women generally are not sexually/romantically attracted to men because of their intelligence...they are drawn to your core person. If a woman likes you she will reframe all of your non-intrinsic qualities (especially positive ones like intelligence, physical fitness, etc.) in a favorable light. But if she doesn't like you, she won't give a damn how smart you are. In fact, many women will make stupid excuses for it like you're "not down to earth" or "just book smart" or "spacey" and will spin your intelligence into something negative.
What's the difference between a "complex, sophisticated man" and a "nerdy bookworm"? Or what's the difference between a "confident, physically fit stud" and a "meathead"?

One guy she liked to begin with, and the other she didn't.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by smoke city
I agree with the above--with some reservations. Intelligence is definitely something that will help you...but only if she already likes you/is attracted to you. Women generally are not sexually/romantically attracted to men because of their intelligence...

Oh really? Ever get into a heated discussion about the anatomy with a woman? Given the topic she would probably already be attracted to you but it does go higher when they find out that you know something that they could benefit from.

 

[Yotsuya-san]

Surest way to attract a woman because of your intelligence is not to try to. Essentially, this means not making a big deal out of how educated (note that merely educated does not always equal intelligence) you are. Let those aspects come naturally in conversation and actions.

 

[smoke city]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Oh really? Ever get into a heated discussion about the anatomy with a woman? Given the topic she would probably already be attracted to you but it does go higher when they find out that you know something that they could benefit from.

Yes, her interest would increase. Exactly my point. If you were acting boring and tentative the whole night you would never *be in a heated discussion with her--because she wouldn't care what you have to say. The key word is 'heated.'
I have been in heated discussions about all kinds of subjects with women--though I try to avoid politics because for me it's a buzzkill--and it gets interesting for both people when they have a reason to listen to each other. Usually men are interested in the complexities of the topic itself, but women are more emotional about it--they get more deeply involved in the discussion because they are interested in figuring out the *person.
You have to be an interesting and appealing person first. John Smith may *know more about anatomy than you do, but *you are better at using your charm to spin it into a fascinating story that people want to hear. He'll get the research job for sure, but who will get the girl?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by smoke city
... He'll get the research job for sure, but who will get the girl?

I will of course, I always do. It's the law of the West. The time and space continueum depends on it. If I didn't get the girl the world would cease to exist as we know it. Ever wonder what happened to the dinasaur? They were just born several million years too early, they should have waited until I showed up!

 

[aBAzLLnA]

Wow we have galt and francisco in one post! Where's dagny??

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Smart is always sexier than dumb, the only obstacle is getting to the point where she can find out if you are smart since you should never advertise it.

What kind of books? I'm not entirely sure most women would even care if you had Plato & Aritotle (or even know who they were for that matter) on your bookshelf, but if you had titles like '10 Habits of Higly Effective People' or something similar they might take note. The other thing to consider is that no woman is ever going to TELL you how smart they think you are, that would be anethema for them. It's like them admitting you have confidence, never happens. But she will file it away in her estimation of your character to be sure.