Instagram dm game advice

[Divorced w 3]

You're simping hard on this girl. Never attend something she is doing just because she is doing it. Think about why for a moment - you don't have that interest so what would be the only reason you'd go? Even if you don't have anything else to do, have better respect for your time. As far as the dialogue around this error - 'embarrass yourself / I need training wheels / my cardio's bad' Could you give her a bigger indication that you have no ability in the sack? And then parroting the red flag stuff multiple times back to her? Come on bud. Have some confidence. You're like a puppy with his tongue out following her down the street. As was mentioned earlier, she's just trying to bait you to buy her class here. Take a step back from this one. You shotgun sprayed all sorts of stuff at her in this text. I'm not sure what angle you're going to come back to her with but I would let her ping you next. If she does hit you up, come here before you say anything else to her, we would be glad to spitball it with you.

 

[Bigpapa]

I have to ask you.. why do you think that - that a woman ‘needs’ rapport to have sex with man?
Exactly why do you think that?
Like where did you get that idea in the first place, that she ‘needs’ that…


I had to google Rapport to be sure I undertand it

If Rapport =‘ a close, harmonious relationship between people characterized by mutual trust, understanding, and smooth communication,’

then no, not really. What’s usually needed is her to be comfortable that she is going to be physically safe, mainly.

But women will take a bet on that, if the sexual tension and chemistry is “mad sparks /off the scale/omg he’s sexy AF/ I’m wetAF” it’ll be a quick exchange and all the guy needs to say is “I’m safe babe don’t worry” . If he can address it, That will do.

there can be a big thrill for women when the safety element is in question actually . Thrills and risk talking. Etc
not across the board all women , but it’s definitely a thing. It’s underrated and underused that concept imo.

dude, prositutes run the same game as regular women- to try get rapport with the John to get him to ‘open up’. Trust me on that one. lol.

Because in the past I would go full speed on sexual tension and in the vast majority of cases it would just blow into my face and usually not see her again, despite knowing for a fact that she is attracted to me deeply

when I started adding rapport building, then things improved drastically

a woman can easily be super horny and still not sleep with you if she does not feel safe ( emotionally and physically ) , unless she is dtf ( but this usually happens to reasons outside of you like her being on a rebounds or things like that )

women naturally just gate keep sex way more than guys, because the natural reflexes is that sex can lead to pregnancy. So for a woman just being horny does not mean that she should sleep with a new guy

there are women for whom would just sleep with you solely based on sexual tension, but these are usually f8cked up or higher on testosterone and are small minority of women

at the end of the day, you are free to test whatever strategies you want, and then compare your field experience

 

[Clockwerk50]

Texting 101: text with a purpose.

Not sure what the purpose of this conversation was, aside from you wanting a pen pal and her wanting you to buy a ticket to her class.

Text her again next Tuesday and hope the opportunity hasn't slipped through your fingertips and that she isn't being entertained by another dude who beat you to the race. I can only assume the ball is in her court now, so there's not much you can do.

 

[Cheeky_James]

Because in the past I would go full speed on sexual tension and in the vast majority of cases it would just blow into my face and usually not see her again, despite knowing for a fact that she is attracted to me deeply

when I started adding rapport building, then things improved drastically

a woman can easily be super horny and still not sleep with you if she does not feel safe ( emotionally and physically ) , unless she is dtf ( but this usually happens to reasons outside of you )

women naturally just gate keep sex way more than guys, because the natural reflexes is that sex can lead to pregnancy

LOL at that last part - not since the 1960s dude.
They are aware of the risks of sex , but they also go out and party and drink alcohol Yknow?

(I rarely see alcohol spoken about on this forum btw that’s so weird to me)

Dude , physically . Physically only mainly, tbh.

Go back up and read the reddit excerpt impost and the stories of the Chad guys pickups.

Plus I’ve heard stories from a user here that has 2 Chad friends. They pull so easily. And I’ve seen guys pull easily IRL.

most of the chat in a pickup is just “fluff” tbh.
Just funny bull**** banter, deflecting, reframing. messing around etc etc
I guess that’s in line with safety. And a dash of fun

don’t think it’s emotional safety tho ?
Btw what is even IS ‘emotional safety’ ..idk.

I just use body language , kino stuff to continually touch her softly, it’s like I’m saying “it’s ok, it’s ok, I’m safe , relax . relax”, but I’m doing it with my hands .

My mouth is just talking bullsh1t or being assertive for what I want and moving things along.

really pickup is just the moving things along, the escalating. I learned to dump the “genuine connection” stuff long ago, it absolutely is NOT needed for a one night stand. As it confuses the chick,

 

[HaleyBaron]

Instagram DM is a waste of time. Don't do it. Keep it brief just like any texting.

 

[Bigpapa]

LOL at that last part - not since the 1960s dude.
They are aware of the risks of sex , but they also go out and party and drink alcohol Yknow?

(I rarely see alcohol spoken about on this forum btw that’s so weird to me)

Dude , physically . Physically only mainly, tbh.

Go back up and read the reddit bit and the stories of the Chad guys pickups I posted.
Plus I’ve heard stories from a user here that has 2 Chad friends. They pull so easily.

most of the chat in a pickup is just “fluff” tbh.
Just funny bull**** banter.
I guess that’s in line with safety.

don’t think it’s emotional safety tho ?
Btw what is even IS ‘emotional safety’ ..idk.

I just use body language , kino stuff to continually touch her softly, it’s like I’m saying “it’s ok, it’s ok, I’m safe , relax . relax”, but I’m doing it with my hands .

My mouth is just talking bullsh1t or being assertive for what I want and moving things along.

really pickup is just the moving things along, the escalating. I learned to dump the “genuine connection” stuff long ago, it absolutely is NOT needed for a one night stand. As it confuses the chick,

I heard stories too about the “chads” doing X or Y, but I never saw it with my own eyes despite going to high end places full of beautiful people and having really good looking friends as well

what I did notice is that “chads” if they gonna pull easy it will be average girls at best

I do not really care what works or does not work on average or bellow average girls

now, it can happen that a guy can meet a girl and things happen fast, absolutely. Is that the norm, kinda far away from it

in terms of counterceptives and other stuff, yeah they are here for a while. But even me as a guy I get anxiety about pregnancy or STDs when I sleep with a girl that I know for sure I would never want to see again . And know plenty of guys that went through this anxiety

if guys get pregnancy and STDs anxiety ( because no contraception is 100% safe ), women for sure feel it at least slightly deeper

To me this fixation that a girl really likes me she would make things super easy is as toxic as the fixation women have that a guy whom likes them would move mountains to be with her

as you can see both go on the extremes of the issue and just makes a radioactive environment where nothing can grow. Not even casual sex

but man, if you think is a good idea to go fully sexual, just do it and let us know how it goes. Sharing is caring

 

[crowolf]

Roll off for a bit. A day or two. And if she doesn't initiate back, you ping for once (preferably voice note, a meme or something), and then after she responds, straight up offer to meet. Whether it's coffee or the pilates thing.

I would probably go for a regular date, because otherwise you are too much in her frame. Unless you are genuinely curious to try that stuff. Then go try it but don't hit on her too much. And don't be a nice friendly guy too. Just spike and challenge. While being cool, calm & collected.

You got this!

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Nothing is happening with this girl, IMO.

Also Pilates are pretty amazing for people who lift heavy for a long time because it causes the muscles to shorten and limits the range of motion, so Pilates helps to stretch the muscles back out, increasing the range of motion and promote size and strength gains.

FYI.

 

[Bigpapa]

Nothing is happening with this girl, IMO.

Better to maximize the likelihood of a yes and shooting your shot, than not shooting your shot because the likelihood of success is low

at the end of the day is a numbers game, and a good proportion of the time is not because of you

what we can do is to improve the likelihood of a yes as much as it is up to us

I think the most painful things are when the vibe is good but she is dodging meeting with you, or when she meets with you things are electric and then you never manage to see her again or starts playing games

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Better to maximize the likelihood of a yes and shooting your shot, than not shooting your shot because the likelihood of success is low

at the end of the day is a numbers game, and a good proportion of the time is not because of you

what we can do is to improve the likelihood of a yes as much as it is up to us

I think the most painful things are when the vibe is good but she is dodging meeting with you, or when she meets with you things are electric and then you never manage to see her again or starts playing games

Oh I agree, I'm just disagreeing with OP thinking he has her in the bag.

 

[Bigpapa]

Oh I agree, I'm just disagreeing with OP thinking he has her in the bag.

when she leaves the conversation to die, it is rarely a sign that you are in a good spot

but fingers crossed for the op, maybe he will beat the odds

 

[steeringclear]

Oh I agree, I'm just disagreeing with OP thinking he has her in the bag.

I’ve recovered and dealt with much worse to know that this can be recovered if I do it right. I can continue the path I know and make it a longer path to success or ask if anyone on here knows a shorter path to success.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I’ve recovered and dealt with much worse to know that this can be recovered if I do it right. I can continue the path I know and make it a longer path to success or ask if anyone on here knows a shorter path to success.

Stop wasting time with disinterested women and find interested ones.

 

[Bokanovsky]

There is interest as she's playing along " would be fun to torture you in a class " isn't being polite it's investing in the conversation its not something you would say in small talk lol

OP's responses were poor and the chick knows she holds all the cards that is the problem theres zero tension or flirting

Yes, there is an interest alright. An interest in selling him a ticket.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I’ve recovered and dealt with much worse to know that this can be recovered if I do it right. I can continue the path I know and make it a longer path to success or ask if anyone on here knows a shorter path to success.

But you're not doing it right. You're starting to sound like you have oneitis. Your way to success at this point is literally just leaving her alone. You've already told this woman that you have no redeeming physical attributes, while casting jealous shade on the fact that she gave a personal lesson to other men. I would just step away from the DM.