"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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In the middle of setting up a date, the girl goes vanishes...

tomwesten27

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Recently I have been meeting a few girls off Tinder. I get the number, text them to set up a date time & place. We are texting back and forth, she agrees to get together, and when I say okay how about this day we go here at 7pm?

Then I get no response.....has happened with 2 girls recently...

Do I wait a day and text again? Or just delete and move onto the next?

I would guess that if he IL was high enough, she would return my text. Is that correct?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Echoes

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Sounds like pretty low interest to me. Give it one more shot and if she doesn't reply, you'll have your answer.
 

AttackFormation

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They're using you to pass time and feed their ego. Next.
 

bukowski_merit

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tomwesten27 said:
Recently I have been meeting a few girls off Tinder. I get the number, text them to set up a date time & place. We are texting back and forth, she agrees to get together, and when I say okay how about this day we go here at 7pm?
If you're just going to do small talk - just pitch the date in your first message to the woman. Here is how ESPI and others do it. (how to do it and how to deal with resistance to the idea is in there.)

The reason: Their decision isn't really going to change much on if they will go out with you or not if all you're doing is basic banter.

Basic banter will not change anything. It doesn't establish rapport. It doesn't build any attraction.


The only thing i've found to work if you're going to take the "talk before pitch" approach is to get it to sexual rapport asap.

This is what I do. And I detailed how I do this 3 years ago here. And what i do has evolved a bit; but that's the basics of it.

It's not easy though... I enjoy the process, but i don't think most men would (it's time consuming).

And for Tinder - not that effective (it works much better on actual dating sites).





tomwesten27 said:
Then I get no response.....has happened with 2 girls recently...
This is why i suggest you just pitch the meet right away.





tomwesten27 said:
Do I wait a day and text again? Or just delete and move onto the next?
If a woman goes ghost when I pitch a date - I never initiate contact after that. If she does - I repitch a meetup right away (literally).





tomwesten27 said:
I would guess that if he IL was high enough, she would return my text. Is that correct?
Yes.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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nismo-4

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It's because these girls have no interest in you outside of being e-friends.

F**k that sh*t! You can do better.
 

Jaylan

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Im with bukowsi. You have to build tension and rapport before asking them on a date. Ive met up with a couple girls on tinder, and they were always keen about our initial and future meetups.

Take your time to make sure she feels comfortable as well as attracted.
 

the_stig

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Yeah that's typical.

Tinder movies fast, it makes POF feel like something from the 90's. Unlike traditional online dating sites, women on Tinder get to pre-select who they converse with, so when a match comes in, it's already someone who is going to peak their interest and attraction. I've found girls are very selective as to who they "Like" too, several have told me 1 of every 10 men on average. Despite that.. most still have nonstop matches coming in.

So what does that mean? Acting quick and capitalizing on their interest is key. I've had the most luck when setting the date up for the next 24-48 hours, sometimes in even less than 10 messages. Don't underestimate how eager girls can be to meet. Push it out any longer, and odds are they will have found other guys who interest them more = FLAKE.

Seducing with tension and rapport certainly works too, but I've found it is usually not necessary if you run solid game.

Lastly, don't stop to analyze these women. Flaking and losing interest is just the nature of the beast here. I've met maybe 15-20 girls off Tinder, it's a solid app, high rate of flakes, will go from sending nudes to not responding in the blink of an eye, but for every flake there's usually another willing to meet.
 
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