I'm torn, what is this?

[indisguise]

Hey Guys, I am new here and I really need help..
I've known this girl for over a year. we've been great together I can't imagine a better match for me! we had our fights but everything was ok until we broke up a while ago. nothing really has gone bad between us we just wanted different things and that was ok when we were friends. but they turn to be real problems when emotions got in the middle. (I'm 25, she's 23)

I kept my NC for over 45 days, during this time I started to heal from my misery and the unbearable pain I was going through. at first I was thinking of ways to fix things and work our differences. but then I got more convinced that it isn't going to work. even though she's great and nice and pleasant in every way. but we are different and we want different things.

Anyway, she texted me wishing me a happy new year 10 days ago. I replied to her because I'm healed and she's from the past. and because I don't want to be rude to her. this girl's life is hard as it is and I don't want to cause her misery or pain knowing that she hasn't moved on yet. I honestly want to ease her pain even if that means i get to suffer more. this might sound crazy but I can't stand seeing her in pain..
After I replied to her text we kept talking for a while and got into some arguments about our issues. she's clearly hasn't moved on and wants to get back together but she won't admit it. she wants me to ask her first.
I don't know what to do, I can't stop thinking about her now, all the good memories flooded back and I really really just want to tell her how much I miss her but i don't know where this relationship is going. I'm torn between my emotions and my decision of moving on..

Any thoughts?
thanks.

 

[Tictac]

Make up your mind what you want and do that.

 

[parkthebus]

Will you be able to find better/ a better relationships?

 

[Atom Smasher]

You have a serious case of oneitis. You want to ease her pain even if it means you will suffer more? Think about what you're saying.

This relationship is broken beyond repair. You need to go NC and forget about her. You do not feel pain over the actual girl, but rather your illusion of who you wish she really was. Your mind has created an idealized version of her, and has grown habituated to her presence, like a drug.

This happens all the time to men. You can't imagine being with out her because you have built up that false, idealized image. Regardless of the reasons, just the fact that this relationship is toxic to your happiness should be enough for you to move on.

Read the dj bible and the book of pook.

 

[Desdinova]

I replied to her because I'm healed

I can't stop thinking about her now, all the good memories flooded back and I really really just want to tell her how much I miss her

You were not healed. You wouldn't miss her if you were. You peeled the scab and now that 5hit hurts all over again. Permanent no-contact is the only way to recover. You shouldn't have responded to her if you wanted to heal.

 

[marmel75]

Trust me, she has moved on. All she is doing is seeing how deep her hook is in you at this point. She has probably already fvcked at least one other guy since you broke up.

 

[dustmuffin]

Trust me, she has moved on. All she is doing is seeing how deep her hook is in you at this point. She has probably already fvcked at least one other guy since you broke up.

This

 

[NSX-R]

She has already moved on.
There was this chick where i took her virginity, she was full into me and i dumped her. She was calling me all the and she was crying. After a couple of months she wrote to me just to see how I'm doing.
I was thinking the same thing as you , i was trying to not make her get hurt but guess what. She had already a bf and they got together 10 days after i dumped her.

Stop overthinking and move on.

 

[El Payaso]

I'm going to give it straight to you. You're a pathetic nice guy.

Read these materials: no more Mr nice guy, the predatory female, the manipulated man and the DJ bible.