"I'm seeing other guys, just wanted to be honest"

[Unprez]

Holy **** from the title I thought that the OP was a fag...god change the friggin thread title

 

[fertileTurtle]

Holy **** from the title I thought that the OP was a fag...god change the friggin thread title

And you sought it out out of CURIOUSITY, so what does that say about you?

Just joking dude. LOL

 

[TheFlyOne]

From the point she tells me she's spinning other plates, no more "nice dates" from me. I'd still see her but it would be more along the lines of come by my place and watch a movie, or lets get a room and hang out kind of outings. Her other "friends" can wine and dine her. If she's really into YOU that should suffice. If not, NEXT!

 

[TheFlyOne]

Holy **** from the title I thought that the OP was a fag...god change the friggin thread title

So you checked this thread out to see what kind of guys he was seeing to see if you fit the build .

 

[Solomon]

So you checked this thread out to see what kind of guys he was seeing to see if you fit the build .

man ROFLLLL

lol @ unprez post flopping

*sigh*

 

[Unprez]

So you checked this thread out to see what kind of guys he was seeing to see if you fit the build .

ok relax guys it was a joke, and wht the hell is post flopping? I dont think anyone here would read this thread hoping that its a gay ad

 

[MatureDJ]

I think that human relations have evolved such that it is of the highest importance for a woman to have a relationship (whereas for men, it is the sex.) When a woman tells you that she is seeing other men, you should interpret this as low interest, and take the attitude that this is a maybe, and just go on with your natural socializing. You should contact her for meetings sporadically, and if she asks who you have been seeing, you just reply "I don't kiss and tell." If she has any interest, she will be the one contacting you, and the mysterious other man will disappear.

 

[mrRuckus]

This might kind of fit in here.

Last Monday I asked a girl to meet up. I told her it was Monday so i was setting up plans early for next weekend. She said she was already busy the nights I offered. I joked "aren't you miss popular" and she played along with it, "yes i'm very popular." Then she offered that she had time to meet up for a little bit Saturday afternoon. I had a softball tournament that saturday. So I just drop the whole thing.

She tried to contact me on AIM a few times over the past week and i either ignored her or had a tiny short conversation. Yesterday I get a text from her. She wants to know when we're getting together. I said on Friday. She told me she gets off at 4 tomorrow. She says she has to be somewhere at 9.

I just assume one of two things. She's either seeing other guys or is going out like every weekend night to drink. She's 23 so it's likely. Either way, it rubs me the wrong way. I'm probably oversensitive but at this point I don't care enough so i'm considering dropping the whole thing. I don't want to be squeeeeezed into a schedule. That's twice now that she's offered to squeeze me in before another activity and she never just comes out and says what that activity is like most people (like i did when i don't give it a second thought and just said nope i got softball -- oh, look, her mystery is actually making me LOSE interest). Other girls clear up the whole evening and aren't in a rush for their second date or to go out drinking. She's showing interest, but not enough for my tastes. I'm supposed to tell her today where/time we're gonna meet. Maybe i'll just tell her i don't want to be rushed and we can do it another day and she'll get the hint... or think i'm difficult and give up .

Am I just being too weird about this? There's nothing wrong with seeing other guys, but on the same day? I don't want girls or this one in particular enough at this moment to want to deal with it. Even if this becomes something consistent I wouldn't want to continually be squeezed in with her always running somewhere.

I don't really care in the end, but lately i'm being really picky and choosy about things where only the really interested girls i'm really interested in getting to know better are going to get me out of my house. (like the girl i went to an nhl game with!)


(Don't care about any anti-txt or aim comments. I use all options and they all have their uses. It's how you use things.)

 

[decades]

^^that would totally annoy me and I wouldn't be the 6-9 guy. If you aren't the 9-9 guy, what's the point?

 

[Mr. Me]

Don't care about any anti-txt or aim comments. I use all options and they all have their uses. It's how you use things.

Yeah, I see how well it's working

I think the problem you're describing could be worked this way: Don't ask Ms. Popular out for a weekend night. Make it for a Monday or Wednesday (IOW, a weeknight) instead of when she's more likely to have things scheduled.

she never just comes out and says what that activity is like most people (like I did when I don't give it a second thought and just said nope I got softball -- oh, look, her mystery is actually making me LOSE interest)

Yeah, that's why you're posting about her instead of nexting her.

Don't knock being vague about giving details. Maybe it's the way women are wired, but when you're a mystery to a woman, it kinda makes them want to find out more. And their imagination kicks in. A chick I've been on several dates with, when she asks me what I did over the weekend, I give one liners like, "I had fun!" or "I was busy!" and give very little more. Long story short, she asks me how she can become my Number One girl. Did I ever specifically state to her that I was seeing other women? No. But that's her imagination filling in the details... and then, that Kitty Kats Kompete.

I'm supposed to tell her today where/time we're gonna meet. Maybe i'll just tell her I don't want to be rushed and we can do it another day and she'll get the hint... or think i'm difficult and give up .

You don't have to be "squeezed in" to fit her schedule. Pick a day and see if she makes herself fit into yours. If not, say, "next time, maybe" then wait some days, pick another day and see if she makes herself available or not for the next date you suggest.

But don't get into "I don't want to be rushed". Don't tell her your negative feelings about this. Stay cool.

There's nothing wrong with seeing other guys, but on the same day?

She's a free agent, as are you. Same day or spaced apart by a day, how does it really matter, you know?

 

[Colossus]

Am I just being too weird about this? There's nothing wrong with seeing other guys, but on the same day? I don't want girls or this one in particular enough at this moment to want to deal with it. Even if this becomes something consistent I wouldn't want to continually be squeezed in with her always running somewhere.

You're not being weird at all. This is the attitude of a man of value. Your time is valuable, and you dont want to be squeezed inbetween activities because that not only conveys you are willing to accomodate HER schedule first but it also tips the frame in her favor, albeit subtly.

What I do with girls like this is just make her an offer. Pick an afternoon or evening of your liking and see if she accepts. If she wants to squeeze you into a window then just say, "well, maybe another time then." I 100% guarantee you that if she is really interested she will either rescind on her plans or make you an acceptable counter-offer after that statement.

If not, oh well. You win either way.

 

[vitor]

6-9 is dinner time, she is trying to get a free meal before drinking with her girls or hanging out with her movie date perhaps?? Tell her you are going to busy but are free next thursday night. IF she says yes like above great, if not then say "Insert girls name here" it was nice meeting and talking to you it just seems like our schedules will never match it was nice meeting you take care. Say good bye and click.

She will call and ask you out or never talk to you again either way you move on. Things are supposed to be fun, interesting and exciting at the begining.

 

[STR8UP]

I'm probably oversensitive but at this point I don't care enough so i'm considering dropping the whole thing. I don't want to be squeeeeezed into a schedule.

No, you just recognize that you aren't a priority to her so the likelihood of getting down her pants without a long, drawn out effort is slim at best. I have had a few women like this in the recent past and no good ever came of the interaction. It shows that there isn't enough interest. And I'm not the kind of person who says "give up" if you can't make her cream her panties after 5 minutes, but if you are playing phone and text tag like that and she's shooting down offers you have already missed your prime opportunity to get her interest level high enough. Now it's an uphill battle because she doesn't SEE your value, and until you get together you have no way of demonstrating it.

She's showing interest, but not enough for my tastes. I'm supposed to tell her today where/time we're gonna meet. Maybe i'll just tell her i don't want to be rushed and we can do it another day and she'll get the hint... or think i'm difficult and give up .

I say you pick a time and a place that is convenient for you, tell her to be there, and if it is anything other than an enthusiastic "YES", you forget about her and find a chick who has time for you.

(Don't care about any anti-txt or aim comments. I use all options and they all have their uses. It's how you use things.)

Don't listen to that static. It's 2009, not 1959.

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

Texting and AIM is for teenagers and women. I might reply to a text in a pinch but since I got a life it holds no appeal to me.

 

[Nutz]

Texting and AIM is for teenagers and women. I might reply to a text in a pinch but since I got a life it holds no appeal to me.

I'd agree with you about AIM and chat programs in general, but texting is absolutely fantastic for setting things up not only logistically, but for stringing along attraction/interest until you can call. You can take your time, do things when you want, and really cultivate awesome subtext when your text game is tight.